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Original poster

Does your child need glasses?

23 replies

Lonelymum · 14/09/2004 21:05

Oh it makes me feel so sad. Ds1 went to the optician yesterday and needs to wear glasses (for reading the board at school mainly). He is only just 8. I know I started wearing glasses at 9 and the whole extended family needs glasses/contact lenses now, but it still made me sad. Did any of your children need glasses at a similar/younger age and did you find there were any problems eg bullying at school?

OP posts:

GeorginaA · 14/09/2004 21:10

Can't help but just wanted to send my sympathies. Ds1 went for an optician visit recently (he's 3) and I've been told he's slightly short-sighted (hardly a surprise as both me and dh are short-sighted) and he needs to go back in 6 months to keep a close watch on his eyesight.

I had glasses for board work only at around 10 years old. The one thing I would recommend is that you stress he uses it for distance work only - I was lazy and wore them all the time and my eyesight deteriorated quite rapidly after that as a result. I think my eyesight would still have got worse, but maybe not deteriorated quite so quick.

lou33 · 14/09/2004 21:13

Ds2 has been wearing them since he was 1. He looks odd without them now, I think! He is 3 1/2 now, but we haven't had any problems so far.

GeorginaA · 14/09/2004 21:19

Meant to say, I think it's slightly different to when we were kids anyway. For one, I think glasses designs are much more flattering now for children's faces and for another, I believe the percentage of children wearing glasses has increased so it's not such a big deal in the eyes of other children anymore. It's not a guarantee they won't get picked on - but if they're going to get bullied it could be any one of a number of "excuses" used.

Goldfish · 14/09/2004 21:29

Ds1 has worn glasses since he was 2 and is now nearly 11. NO one else in our family wears them, but they just seem to be a part of him now. He has not really had any problems. He had one boy in year 5 who called him names but he is like that to everyone. He has had no problems this year at all.

jampot · 14/09/2004 21:49

dd has worn glasses since she was 5 - i did feel sad for a little while but there are so many trendy and cool glasses that I think she quite likes it

beansmum · 14/09/2004 21:57

ds doesn't have glasses (yet) but i have worn them since i was 2.5 and never had any problems with bullying because of them. there were a couple a kids who bullied everyone, including me, but they would have done even if i didn't have glasses. actually i still have a pair of my glasses from when i started school. they were red and yellow and i loved them so much i've kept them nearly 20yrs!

JanH · 14/09/2004 22:02

All of mine need glasses, lonelymum. They've inherited their short sight from me and it seems very unfair that all 4 have got it (2 out of 4 would be OK!) AFAIK none of them has had any problems with name-calling etc.

Can't remember the exact ages they all started wearing them but at least 2 of them were still in the infants. Does your DS do any sport yet? (It's less of a problem if they don't.) My DS1 (16 now) uses daily disposable soft lenses, just for training and matches originally but all the time now. DS2 (11) would prefer lenses but he has dry eyes so can't - he did get a ball smack in the face the other day but it wasn't as bad as I've feared.

Try to be positive for him - I get the impression that loads of kids have glasses now who wouldn't have done a few years ago - he will probably be cool about it!

edam · 14/09/2004 22:45

I wore glasses from the age of 7, never had any real problems. Was teased on a handful of occasions but only by people who were busy calling everyone else spotty, or fat, or skinny, or red-headed, or whatever, so it didn't particularly bother me, IYSWIM. When I did go through a period of really being bullied after moving schools (half way across the country) no-one ever even mentioned glasses ? it was all about accent!

Tinker · 14/09/2004 23:38

My little girl has worn glasses since nursery - she looks very cute, if I say so myself. Not had any problems except one child called her four-eyes but this child also sneered when she got a bike saying it was a boy's bike. Since this child has a unisex name I told my daughter to tell her she had a boy's name

Loads of kids wear glasses now, far more than when I was a child. And if you go to France it seems like about 50% wear them

SueW · 14/09/2004 23:57

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at OP's request.

frogs · 15/09/2004 08:31

My dd1 has been wearing glasses since Reception at her first eye test she not only couldn't read the letters on the chart, she couldn't see that there was a chart (aaargh bad mother alert!). So the benefits of glasses have been pretty obvious to her, and we've never really had any problems about her wearing them.

We've had occasional incidents of other kids grabbing her glasses in the playground and running off with them, and occasional cries of 'four-eyes', but mainly when she was younger (she's now 9). I'd expect 8-year olds to have got over that, really.

You could always practise a couple of smart responses with him for all eventualities -- eg. 'Well I can take my glasses off, but you'll still be ugly", or 'Oh, you really are immature, aren't you' (accompanied by a withering stare).

Good luck -- I'm sure it'll be fine.

efmach · 15/09/2004 10:20

My son has been wearing them since he was 4.5 yrs. He's now 7.5 yrs and has had no problems with bullying. As the years go by, more of the children in his class are needing them.

Thomcat · 15/09/2004 10:41

Lottie doesn't wear glasses Lonelymum, well not yet. I know how you feel though. We went for her eye test last Friday and at the one point one of the many people we see during the appt said that she was boderline and may well have to wear glasses. I know it doesn't really matter in the grand scale of life but it did make me really sad. I just sat hoping that we'd be okay and that she wouldn't have to wear them. I didn't want one more thing to have to think about, one more thing to put her through, as in forever putting them back on her and stressing her out. Luckily for now we got away with it. If and when the time comes it'll make me really sad that she has to wear them. Not because there is anything wrong with it, or that I look at children who wear glasses and think it looks bad or that i feel sorry for them, I don't, I don't even really notice it but I just don't want Lottie to get all the things they say children with DS get / have. She's got the glue ear, she's got the late to walk, late to talk, she's got the low set ears, the mottled skin tone, the slow bowel, etc etc, etc, I don't want her to have the bad eyesight, or any of the other helath problems associated with DS.
I'm sure he won't be bullied at school babes, but I really do feel for you at the moment, it is rubbish.
Lots of love, TC x

Original poster

Lonelymum · 15/09/2004 19:42

Thanks for all the replies. I suppose bullying is a bit strong a word for the reaction I am worrying about. It is just that my ds does not find it easy to make friends and is a bit different to the other boys in his class (not into football and a bit brainier than the average kid - sorry, not boasting here, just trying to explain). The last thing I feel he needs is to suddenly have another difference from his peer group (not well expressed but I hope you understand what I am trying to say).
I am very interested that a number of you say that more children wear glasses these days. I hadn't noticed that. Why do you think that is?

OP posts:

doziduck · 17/09/2004 14:11

Hi lonely mum. Your ds sounds very similar to mine. he has started wearing glasses about 6 months ago, he's 8. He doesn't have alot of friends and half the time i think it's his own choice, he seems more mature than alot of them and prefers to be with the adults. he also does absolutely nothing sporty so is a bit out of it in that respect too. I always worried about him anyway and when he first got the glasses i was so anxious someone would laugh at him but so far he hasn't had any problems, not that he has told me of anyway!

Original poster

Lonelymum · 18/09/2004 18:53

Hi Doziduck, yes they do sound similar. Ds got his glasses today and is absolutely thrilled to be able to see clearly again. (I don't think he realised how bad his sight was until he had it corrected). He seems very cheerful about wearing glasses so I suppose that will help him if any problems arise with other children at school.

OP posts:

hmb · 18/09/2004 19:05

Dd now wears her's all the time (age 7.5). She had them for board work when she was 6.5. She has had no probelms with them and look amazing in them! I wasn't surprised as I am as blind as a bat (-9.5 diopters in both eyes) and wear contacts.

bizzi · 19/09/2004 09:57

My ds sounds similar too to yours doziduck and lonelymum, few friends, not sporty, scientific, mathematical mind - surprised he's mine sometimes
He's worn glasses since he was 5, doesn't like to be without them and was only teased once in yr4 by 3 lads in his class.
I felt very low when we were told he needed them but seeing how his vision improved and his positive attitude to wearing them I'm now just glad something can be done. They can look trendy too!

Tessiebear · 19/09/2004 11:02

My DS1 has worn glasses since he was 3. He wears them all day everyday and to be honest they are part of him and part of what he looks like and who he is IYKWIM He has NEVER been bullied and he is actually the only child in his class with glasses. He does every sport you can think of and they have never held him back. TBH he is so much more able with glasses and it means he is not held back.

Original poster

Lonelymum · 19/09/2004 17:09

Ds hasn't been to school with his glasses yet, but I am really amazed at how good he feels about them. He decided he wanted to wear them when we went out this morning when he had a very good chance of bumping into someone he knew (but didn't).

Also, they do make him look rather intelligent in that way that glasses can, and he actually is intelligent so I am beginning to see how they become part of the wearer's personality and how so many of you have said your child wouldn't be your child without them. I am so pleased that this doesn't look like it is going to be an issue worth worrying about. I'll know next time if any of my other children end up needing glasses!

OP posts:

hmb · 19/09/2004 17:11

The day I was given glasses was astonishing. I was astounded at how much you were supposed to be able to see, as I had never seen this detail in the world before. It was miraculous! Quite wonderful!!!

Original poster

Lonelymum · 19/09/2004 17:15

Yes that is what my son is experiencing right now and why he chose to wear them out this morning. His eyesight isn't that bad, but obviously bad enough to make the difference and he is fascinated by the effect the glasses have on his view of things.

OP posts:

hmb · 19/09/2004 17:20

Enjoy this moment with him . It is one of the most amazing memories of my childhood, fwiw.

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