Hospital Phobia

[lonelyinacrowd39]

My DH has recently been diagnosed with a serious illness. He needs major surgery , which is happening in a few days. I am trying to be supportive , but my Mother Died from an infection following routine surgery a few years ago , It was a long drawn out death,6 months after her operation , never left the hospital ,severel bouts of sepsis, MRSA etc at a youngish age, and I'm terrified ! I've avoided hospitals since my mothers death , (all kids were homebirths etc) to the point that they have become a phobia.

I know I need to just get on with this and be a supportive wife , but I am panic stricken.

Sorry to hear about your Mum.

Does your husband want you with him? Some people seem to prefer someone with them, some prefer to be alone. If he would rather be alone then there's no need for you to go.

If he wants you there then I would go with him unless there is someone else who could go with him like his Mum or a friend. Presumably someone needs to look after your kids so maybe could stay home.

I am very nervous of hospitals / GPs but sometimes you have not much of a choice. I've been ill myself and just had to go and you do get used to it - if I am very worried about germs I flash wipe things after but hospitals are cleaned a lot and its not needed but if it gets you through then do whatever you need to. Sorry about your husband - hospital will be his best hope of getting better. It's very rare for MSRA /sepsis etc.

Thank you for your reply penguin. As it happens My husbands surgery was postponed at the last min (he was ready to go down to theatre when an emergency case came in) So it will be rescheduled in a few weeks no doubt.
We have no parents between us, so no option of anyone else being there for him. He says he understands if I don't want to be there but I know he is feeling scared and would prefer it if I was.

Once you are in surgery there are lots of nurses to look after you and don't think you would be allowed in there anyway. When I went in DH stayed all the time but there's not much point staying when someone is in surgery, its just the waiting before hand and collecting.

I would wait with him if you can manage it. If not don't worry maybe he could take a nice bag of things to take his mind of it like magazines, books, maybe a card from you and kids, slippers, a travel book to somewhere you are going on holiday to or puzzle books, whatever he's into really.