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Original poster

I think DH is dying

58 replies

TerrifiedandWorried · 25/11/2018 19:15

He has been unwell for ages (years) and has now reached a point where his left leg has completely lost any muscle tone. It's skinny and wasted. He has severe pain on and off and has had bouts of temporary paralysis from waist down. He also has periods of severe shaking. He is suffering from depression as a result and has twice attempted suicide (that I know of).

He had a lypoma removed from his spine 14 years ago and I think this is muddying the waters. An MRI showed nothing on the original surgery site so they have done another one. He has had nerve conduction tests which show that he has lost 85% function.

I don't know why I'm posting really. His next appointment is 3/12 and he will get results of MRI. I'm assuming it is MND or MS. I cannot see any good ending for this.

OP posts:
Original poster
TerrifiedandWorried · 26/11/2018 08:21

He won't do anything until the 3rd. Believe me, I've tried!

OP posts:
KatieTheBitch · 26/11/2018 08:25

I'm so sorry you're facing such a difficult time. Are there any support services available to you at the moment? I really hope you guys can get the information, support and services available to you. And look after yourself too please, you are also going through a difficult time and need to be at your strongest.

KatieTheBitch · 26/11/2018 08:26

And if you're really worried you can call your local hospital and see if anyone can take him in involuntarily for his mental health, if you're really concerned about suicide them you need to do what you can to keep him alive. Then the medical care would be available there too xx

Original poster
TerrifiedandWorried · 26/11/2018 21:07

I'm not currently too concerned about suicide. I'm concerned that diagnosis on Monday could trigger it though.

OP posts:
Lushmetender · 27/11/2018 21:16

Try to reason that knowing what is wrong will best equip you all to make future decisions and know how to make him comfortable. Equally it will help you knowing what the options are. Could be anything! Best not to second guess. I would just asking if you think your husband knows more than letting on he’s so reluctant? Just a thought.

Lushmetender · 27/11/2018 21:17

FYI if he’s not able to make informed decisions due to state of health ie if you feel he’s incapacitated by his mental state, then maybe you can admit him yourself to get him checked out. Hope you get the answers you need!

Bluesheep8 · 28/11/2018 18:53

anniehm MS isn't necessarily chronic and not all cases require medication...

TakeAChanseyOnMe · 30/11/2018 14:42

I suspect the muscle wasting is due to damage from the original surgery. If the muscles aren’t getting normal nerve signals, they can become inactive and waste due to inactivity.

Shaking can be a result of weakness. Brain fog is very common if you’re in pain constantly.

Thinking about you both for Monday. FlowersFlowers

Original poster
TerrifiedandWorried · 30/11/2018 17:51

Thank you x

OP posts:
Oldstyle · 30/11/2018 18:15

My partner was waiting for an MRI after a test showed possible prostate cancer. His symptoms got rapidly worse while we were waiting, ditto the pain and his MH, but he was a bit like your partner and refused to do anything. In the end I phoned the hospital without him knowing and begged for an urgent appointment. I was in tears on the phone. They called us in then and there. I told him what I'd done and actually I think he was relieved. Probably too late for you since you've got an appointment on Monday but I recommend it for future reference. I also called out the out-of-hours doctor on many occasions when he was saying not to bother. There are two of you involved in this, and you have a right to do whatever you think is best for both of you.
I do feel for you. Hope you get some clarity on Monday. x

Schuyler · 02/12/2018 13:33

Wishing you luck for theappointment. Flowers Whatever the outcome, I hope they can also refer for some psychological support for your husband.

HollowTalk · 02/12/2018 13:38

Wishing you all the luck in the world for tomorrow.

AlicaMaudsley · 02/12/2018 14:05

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hewhinessoshewines · 02/12/2018 14:11

Thinking of u

QOD · 02/12/2018 14:20

Gosh what a nightmare. Best wished for tomorrow

Original poster
TerrifiedandWorried · 02/12/2018 16:45

Not much sleep has been had here over the last few days. We have a comprehensive list of symptoms to show consultant plus video of one of the episodes of shaking. DH thinks there won't be any kind of diagnosis tomorrow. I'm not sure we could bear that.

Thank you for kind comments.

OP posts:
Fightthebear · 02/12/2018 20:03

Best of luck for tomorrow op.

MerryInthechelseahotel · 02/12/2018 20:18

Yes, another one here wishing you both all the best tomorrow Thanks

hewhinessoshewines · 03/12/2018 16:03

How was it

Original poster
TerrifiedandWorried · 03/12/2018 16:14

Just got back. No diagnosis.

OP posts:
H1dingInSight · 03/12/2018 16:18

I’m so sorry. Did they suggest next steps?

NicoAndTheNiners · 03/12/2018 16:21

Have they suggested further tests?

Original poster
TerrifiedandWorried · 03/12/2018 16:25

They're going to discuss it in their weekly meeting. And then lumbar puncture/blood tests probably. He didn't even introduce himself to us and clearly wasn't listening. We gave him the list of symptoms and he's adding them to DH's notes.

OP posts:
NicoAndTheNiners · 03/12/2018 17:06

Sometimes it is a process of elimination I guess. Have you got an idea of timescale for another apt?