FIL going in for bowel cancer surgery tomorrow....

[mm22bys]

Hi,

my FIL is going into hospital for surgery for bowel cancer tomorrow, and I would like to do something nice for MIL.

I have thought about preparing her some meals (like casseroles), but am after some other ideas.

We normally live away from the family, but I will be here for almost two weeks after his surgery and would like to help out where I can.

Any ideas on what I can do to "help out" would be hugely apreciated.

Thx

Could you arrange for a cleaner to pop in every so often after you've gone so your MIL doesn't have to worry about keeping the house clean. Perhaps even book her a manicure or something else she wouldn't do for herself normally to distract her. My condolences on what must be a very difficult time for your family.

Thx for the suggestion, she does have a cleaner who already comes in once a week.

I am seeing my two SILs tonight so I'll have a chat to them.

Thx very much, appreciate your response,

Sympathies for you and your family. My FIL has been diagnosed this week. Unfortunately there is nothing they can do for him, he has many secondary cancers.

If he comes home from hospital before you go back home, then just offering to stay with him so MIL can go out and about will be a huge help.. It will be good for her to be able to carry on with normal activities (is she has them)...

Also offering to drive her to the hospital and pick her up will be much appreciated, especially if you have trouble parking at the hospital...

Hope this helps

preparing meals is a great idea - I'm not sure if this is what you meant but maybe you could prepare things that can be left in the freezer for them to have after you've gone home again. Offer to do the shopping for her - or show her how to do it online?

or you could even do it for her online and have it delivered, even after you've left.

how independent is your MIL? does she drive etc?

That's such a good idea! You could do her shopping for her online even after you've gone home.

Thanks for the suggestions.

Unfortunately we are in Australia where on-line shopping is in the Dark Ages compared with the UK, but that won't stop me from actually driving to the shop!

Even though she is poorly herself, MIL is very independent and does everything for everybody else!

Thx,

Not sure what you can do but wanted to say I hope it goes well. My father had this a year ago, am glad to say he is fine now.

What about little things like running a bath for her when she gets back from visiting him with some scented candles around it?

Or offering to do a manicure/pedicure for her? Or paying for a beauty therapist to visit at home to do a massage?

TBH though, I would just get in plenty of wine (or whatever she drinks) and rent a stack of DVD's and just sit up with her late into the night watching tv, drinking wine and letting her 'unload'!

Don't forget about FIL though, is there a particular hobby that you could buy a magazine or two for him to browse in hospital? Or perhaps make a batch of home made fudge for him, or choco brownies? Or whatever you think might make him feel special and loved!

BTW, you sound like a dream of a DIL - I bet your DH is as proud as punch of you