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Who is to blame?

20 replies

CercoCasa · 02/01/2018 15:26

Just found out that a very close relative attended an appointment with a consultant that was meant for me to go to, and they spoke incessantly and I was never seen by said consultant as a result, nor was there any follow up to help with my medical situation at the time. This was over 15 years ago and if I had gotten the correct treatment my life could have been totally different.
Who is at fault and what can I do about it now? It was devastating to only just find this out after so long

OP posts:
MorningstarMoon · 02/01/2018 15:53

Did this close relative pose as you? As in did the consultant know it wasn't You?

Also did you send the close relative to pose as You,

How did said close relative know the exact details of your appointment?

retirednow · 02/01/2018 16:12

Why did someone go pretending to be you.

Wolfiefan · 02/01/2018 16:14

I am guessing that as it was so long ago the person who attended the appointment was the parent or guardian of the OP but they didn't take the OP with them.
Not sure what good opportioning blame will do though.

hevonbu · 02/01/2018 16:22

Let bygones be bygones, you can only work with what lies in the future. Your relatives should perhaps have brought you and then things would perhaps be different, and now they aren't. But blaming the relative won't change anything, would it? What can you do? You can seek medical treatment now, and you can seek counseling and talk through the grief from not having had whatever opportunities you lost.

CercoCasa · 02/01/2018 18:13

No I didnt send the relative to pose as me nor did they pretend to be me. They were themselves. I never even knew of the appointment as they would open my post. It was in my early 20s when I lived with them. I only learned of this appointment end of 2017, after requesting medical notes.
The result of them never telling me affected me for years not only my health but also earnings as if I had had the right treatment I would have been well enough to work.
It is a total bombshell and I never thought they culd do that so while I get that not much can be done also counselling wont really make up for a lost life.

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hevonbu · 02/01/2018 18:40

That's true, what's gone is gone. Maybe they did what they thought was best for you, with hindsight you now know that's not the case, but it doesn't change that they thought it was the best option, right or wrong.

hevonbu · 02/01/2018 18:42

Maybe you would have had to work in a horrible job for a low salary, that had not been great either.

If there's any treatment you could start now that could perhaps change things for you on the future.

AJPTaylor · 02/01/2018 18:52

Are you suggesting negligence due to the lack of follow up/checking that you had the correct info?

CercoCasa · 02/01/2018 18:56

Yes, it was negligence

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babyitscoldoutsideX · 02/01/2018 19:00

I would say let it go. Not sure if you're looking for compensation or what but if I was you'd I'd be grateful for the life you do have and move on.

retirednow · 02/01/2018 19:05

They should not have opened your post and should not have gone to your appt. Do you know why they did this or what excuse they gave the doctor for you not being there. Who do you think was negligent.

Ylvamoon · 02/01/2018 19:06

I don't think it was negligent in behalf of the consultant. You said yourself: " I never even knew of the appointment as they would open my post. It was in my early 20s when I lived with them Obviously the fault could be with your relative... Do you have the same surnames and initials? Than it could simply be a mistake.
I agree let bygones be bygones.

CercoCasa · 02/01/2018 19:13

Same surname but different initial so no easy mix up. They have always opened my post whenever I have lived with them.
Not sure WHy they went - probably thought they could sort it out for me.
No the consultant was not negligent but i dont understand why they didnt think it odd the actual patient ie. me did not attend or did not follow up asking me to go or why the GP never looked into it.

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CercoCasa · 02/01/2018 19:16

To be honest, after seeing my medical notes and how unprofessional GP are in their notes, I would urge everyone to order a copy (SCR for £50) and look through - very insightful. You also may learn things about yourself you never knew..or were never told.

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SnowBallsAreHere · 02/01/2018 19:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CercoCasa · 02/01/2018 19:33

^ THIS Exactly. Am not saying ALL docs are incompetant but the SCR is an aye opener to a very flawed system we use yet dont really know how it workd behind the scenes

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frasier · 02/01/2018 19:39

Seeing your own medical notes is VERY good advice.

OP, see a lawyer if you want to put the legal aspect to rest. Find someone who will give you an hours advice for free.

CercoCasa · 02/01/2018 19:51

Yes there are 2 options £10 or £50 for the lot.....not sure how many people actually are even aware or would even get them. Also what was shocking to read was how casual the GPs are in their comments

While it can be distressing to read about oneself or see a situation in a new light...it may not be how you remember it, it is certainly an education.
I believe everyone should have free access to their med notes so they stay fully informed of what is happening to them and what decisions are being made for and about them, that they maybe unaware of.

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frasier · 02/01/2018 20:22

In case of confusion, my post above ^^ is not sarcastic. It truly is a very good idea to request to see your own medical notes.

CercoCasa · 02/01/2018 20:36

It is a very good idea to see how accurate the info they hvae on you is and IF it is actually true.

This lady was wrongly labelled an alcoholic www.theguardian.com/society/2006/nov/02/health.epublic

I now want to be deleted from the database too

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