Gut instinct says it's cancer

[eleast]

Could I have some words of comfort please. I have a referral today with a gyno as my doctor wants to check for cervical cancer (then tells me not to lose sleep!) I'm terrified. I've convinced myself it's advanced cancer. Not helped by bleeding after sex last night. I've had a few episodes of spotting over the last 8 months as well as irregular periods lasting 10 days for the best part of a year. Also have frequent watery discharge and back pain.
I have an 18mo old and a 3 yo old and all I can think is how confused they will be when I'm gone and won't remember me. Plus I'm terrified of dying, like panic attack petrified.
My appt is 2pm but I was up half the night googling unable to think of anything else. I just want to run away from it all. All I keep picturing is being told it's cancer, I feel so sure of it

Oh bless you.
I won't tell you not to worry because of course you are worrying.
Just offering a handhold and good wishes that everything is ok x

Gut instincts are unreliable. Trust me on that!
You had a baby only 18 months ago which can play havoc with you gynaecologically hence spotting, bleeding and discharge - and backache.
Your GP is being proactive in referring you. Worrying yourself into a state is perfectly normal. However, you will go to your appointment and, trust me, it doesn't matter how anxious you are, the consultant will be able to deal with it.
Just get through the next few hours (you can!) and report back.

Thank you, that's partly why I didn't go to the gp for a while because I assumed it was hormones settling but the gp said it would have gone back to normal by now. I just freak out at the mention of cancer and I've read countless times that symptoms mean it's advanced.
I'm sitting here with my 1yo old who just came and gave me a hug and is blissfully unaware that inside I'm breaking down with fear and panic. I know my DH will raise them well but I don't want to leave them.
My mom always says if it's 1 in 10 why do you think you are that 1 and I always say back why do you think you aren't. That's my attitude to life.

Well, I would beg to differ with your GP.
I totally get your panic but I've been in your situation a few times, been convinced it was Worst Case Scenario and been proven wrong by specialists.
Just grit your teeth and get through the next few hours.

Symptoms like yours don't means it's advanced necessarily. Advanced would mean problems with lungs, spine - more distant to any cancer.

I had cervical cancer 3 years ago. I had symptoms sort of like yours - bit of pain, bit of bleeding, very tired (not that I'm suggesting you have it though!) - I had very early stage 2a cancer which was treated with chemo radiation and I've been all clear since.

I won't tell you not to worry because you will be sick to your stomach with what ifs but I will tell you that IF it is cancer, it is not the death sentence it used to be, the treatments for this disease is very good and you will get through it with amazing amazing cancer support teams who envelope you in care.

But, you know, you might just get told everything is fine and it is just your hormones - hold onto that little thought as well xx

But you are 9x more likely to be one of the 9, and the odds wont be anything like that high.

Worryingalldaylong you have no idea what your post means to me. All I've read is that early stages don't get symptoms. And I know I shouldn't google it but I'm my own worse enemy.

You can probably all guess I suffer with health anxiety. I was the 13 yo old who would think she was having a heart attack if she had chest pain! And it doesn't help DH isn't well, he's been having pain in his side for months now and no one can work out why, he's the kind never to complain but he went to a&e twice in that much pain, even on tramadol he feels it. So in the back of my head I'm scared we are both dying.

My appt is at 2pm so I'll try and distract myself for 7 hrs but when the kids are playing my mind just goes back to it. I've been a rubbish mom lately worked up with worry.

lifetime risk of cervical cancer is minute 0.6% (I actually remember this from when I drove myself mad consulting Dr Google )

And, as worryingalldaylong proves, there are many positive outcomes. Glad you're ok, worrying.

Please, please try not to worry. 9 years ago I had bleeding after sex and my gp sent me to the gynaecologist.

They did a smear test, revealed SIN III and I had a colposcopy and lletz procedure. The results came back - cervical cancer.

I had an MRI and a blood test and then a cold knife cone biopsy. It turned out to be grade 1a1 cervical cancer and that was all the treatment I needed.

I've been fine since and went on to have two children. At the time I was terrified, especially when I heard the C word, and google just made it worse.

I'm not saying your story will be the same as mine but I'm trying to say that, if it is cancer, it doesn't have to be the end.

Take care, look after yourself, and avoid google for the time being.

Do you check for cancer regularly? Where I am there is a screening program running, and I (and everyone else) is called in for a checkup every other year, a routine exercise. And a similar screening program is running for breast cancer, which means you go every year on something. Anyway, could it be that you've not had a checkup for some time and the doctor is just doing it as a routine measure?

please don't worry till you've got something to worry about. Spin it round and try and make the next few weeks as special as you can and find some way to relax because whether it's cancer or not that's going to be some good skills to have (yoga/meditation) for you and your kids. I've given myself some serious health issues from stressing about stress it's so silly I wish I could go back in time and give myself a hug and tell me to calm down....

Between friends and family I know loads of woman that have had the same issues of you and a few got treatment for dodgy cells we are just so lucky here that we have the NHS and they can treat the cells before it becomes anything more sinister.

Good luck for today's appointment

Hevonbu we have regular smear tests I think it's every 3 yrs. I was meant to have one when I was pregnant with my youngest so had it after he was born, so my last smear was 13 months ago and came back fine. We don't get any other routine tests on the nhs at my age (29) but I do check myself and try and keep aware of things simply because on my dads side his dad died of stomach cancer, and his mom, Nan & a few of his aunts died of breast cancer (he lost his mom when he was a young teen). Then last year his sister lost a battle to spinal cancer after beating breast cancer years before!

Good luck today. I had a horrible appointment to rule out something scary recently so I know just how you're feeling.

A normal smear a year ago is reassuring (assume you are the OP with failed name change?)
Not sure I'd have had sex the night before a gynaecological examination but it's too late now!

It is possible - of course it is - probably not even 1 in 10, even with your symptoms though - but it's far more likely to be something like an ectropion. And cervical cancer gives symptoms quite early because you get bleeding etc. There are some cancers such as ovary that present very late because of where they are.
I hope it's a good appointment - they may not give you a definite answer today though, you may need further tests. And if they are all clear maybe that is the time for seeking some help regarding your health anxiety.

Agree that gut instincts are unreliable when it comes to health.
I totally understand though op, a couple of years ago when my dc were 1&3 I had a noticeable lump on my thyroid and when I went to the GP they referred me for an urgent scan at the head and neck cancer clinic...as you can imagine I completely lost it and convinced myself that I had cancer or they wouldn't have sent me there. They were just being careful in checking, I turned out to have a cyst that had haemorrhaged.
They are just being cautious, I'm not going to tell you you haven't got cancer but it's still less likely than other things. Hang on in there

Did they do a blood test?

I had the same symptoms. Was refused a smear test as I wasn't due another one.

Pushed harder for one and was instead given an internal.

Where they found a cervical polyp.

I had it removed at hospital and was in and out in an hour xxx

Yes it wasn't an intentional name change it's because I went from the laptop to the phone! I just didn't like the original name so made another later on
Yes i had blood tests back in October as the gp originally thought it was pcos but all my bloods were fine and an internal scan of my ovaries were fine too. That's why she stared focusing on the spotting as I originally went as I was fed up of having 10 day periods! I have had cervical ectropion (sp?) about 8 years ago when I was on the pill but I'm not on any contraceptive now we just use condoms (hence didn't think it would affect the examination).

I know I probably won't get an answer today but just speaking to a gynaecologist might make me feel better. I have actually started counselling recently because of my anxiety!

A CA125 blood test is a massive indicator to if it is cancer or not.

Blackteadrinker I don't think they would have thought to test for those, she was looking at my hormones and thyroid I think. Though a dear friend who has had numerous problems down there and took years to finally get an endometriosis diagnosis told me that hormone blood tests have to be done on certain days and more than once. I don't know how true that is though.

CA115 is a marker for ovarian cancer not cervical cancer. So it's not relevant here.

Good luck OP

Hope all goes well today OP and it's nothing to worry about.

If however you do need any help or support in the future, or even now this morning if you are struggling, please contact

www.jostrust.org.uk - they are a massive source of support and help.

Good luck OP.

And I know its easy to say and hard to do, but please stay away from Dr Google! Earlier this year I Google-diagnosed myself with MS, then a few months later I diagnosed DP with lung cancer (thankfully decided not to share that one with him). Neither turned out to be the case at all . I really hope yours turns out to be nothing serious, and statistically that is by far the most likely outcome, but even if it is bad news, all the worrying beforehand won't help.

Can I just say a massive thank you for the replies this morning. I go over it so much in my head and it helps to actually get it out and voice my worry to someone even if I can't see them. And I'm really grateful that people took the time to read and reply and offer comfort. I feel a lot more hopeful now than I did at 5am.