Thinking about death

[overduemamma]

I know abit morbid for a Sunday night but I just wonder does anyone else think about death? I'm 27 I've lost a lot of close people around me and sometimes when I'm on my own or having a quiet moment with one of the babies I find myself thinking about death. I've pretty much planned my own funeral. Told partner what I want playing etc. I often find myself thinking about what if my children died? Obviously this would be the worse thing ever to happen but is it normal?!! Then I'll end up getting upset! It's just so annoying and I don't know how to get out of it x

Anyone?!?

Yeah I do sometimes. I lost my dad and someone else close and you start to think about your own mortality.

Are you a relatively new mum? Big life changes and the responsibility of parenthood can be really overwhelming and it is normal to have a degree of thoughts about death and to think about planning.

However, obsessively ruminating over it to the point where it is taking over much of your waking time isn't normal and it is worth having a chat with your GP, midwife or health visitor about.

Yep! I go through phases though. When I was younger, I also experienced quite a lot of deaths-the majority of them shocking and untimely. I think it made me quite anxious-I thought death was always round the corner and I just could never relax.

Thankfully, I've got past that but I do sometimes have to stop myself going down on the route of "oh, I'm going to die one day. Definitely. How will it happen? When? OH god, what if it's awful...?" Etc etc!!

Also, having lost a number of people close to you is likely to trigger thoughts of your own plans. It's good to discuss your wishes with your loved ones and to make sensible plans for the future, should the worst happen (things like Wills, Advanced Care Plans, guardianship of your children etc). It's a very taboo subject, I think. As a society we are very worried that talking about things like death might bring it closer or somehow 'wish it into being'. It doesn't, it just makes it easier if the unlikely does happen.

I'm a mum to a 3 yr old (almost) and a 5m old girl and now you mention it I have started thinking about It more since I've had her. I don't think about it to the point it's unhealthy I just wondered if anyone else had these thoughts. In terms of talking about it I've told my partner what I want at my funeral etc x

I lost my Nanna in Feb this year. She was the first family member I've lost since being an adult. My grandad died when I was 11 and my uncle when I was 13. My grandad and my uncle were ill though so kind of expected but my Nanna was fine. She had had a cold for a week or so doctor on the Monday said it was a virus. We had tried ringing her Wednesday evening then first thing Thursday morning my mum went to her bungalow (she had a key) and found she had collapsed in the hallway and passed away turns out she had pneumonia. Anyway after her death I started to have panic attacks about death and me dying. Lasted a couple of months I'm not too bad now but I do seem to have a different outlook on what might be and do worry more than I have befor

I do, a lot,though I haven't lost anyone except through extreme old age. I work in healthcare though so see a lot of people who have developed illnesses unexpectedly.

I find practical action really helps, so have decided on guardians for ds, written a will, got life insurance. The existential stuff I then worry about less.