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Original poster

I'm getting so annoyed with dh's weekend headaches... any suggestions what he could do?

23 replies

emkana · 03/03/2007 20:16

He's quite stressed at work atm. He used to get headaches every weekend pre kids, because he used to sleep too long (til lunchtime), now he gets up at about 9am the weekend and he's been a lot better, but with the pressure from work things have been bad recently. He went to bed at 6 pm and is unlikely to reemerge before tomorrow morning , two weeks ago he spent he spent all weekend in bed as well.

He drinks one cup of coffee a day, otherwise tea and squash. Has no more than a pint of beer a day. Diet not massively healthy, but okay-ish. No exercise. Doesn't go to sleep until 12.30 am on a weeknight (often later the weekend), gets up at 6.45 am on weekdays.

Would be grateful for suggestions as this is really annoying, for me and the children and of course for him.

OP posts:

Lilliput · 03/03/2007 20:20

Do you think he may be clinically depressed?

Original poster

emkana · 03/03/2007 20:26

Hadn't really crossed my mind, he seems cheerful enough.

OP posts:

hatwoman · 03/03/2007 20:27

fresh air and exercise. loads of it if possible. if not encourage him to walk more - walk to the station, get off the bus a couple of stops earlier etc. reading in bed (ie not trying to go to sleep with the tv/computer still whizzing infront of your eyes) early morning weekend engagements that mean he has to get out of bed. and - maybe most importantly - tackle the source of the stress at work.

FluffyMummy123 · 03/03/2007 20:27

Message withdrawn

Lilliput · 03/03/2007 20:28

everyone is right, fresh air and exercise might do the trick. Good way for him to spend more time with the kids at the weekend too.

BettySpaghetti · 03/03/2007 20:28

Is he drinking enough liquid (excluding caffeine/alcohol) ? DP gets headaches if he doesn't drink enough water through the day.

RustyBear · 03/03/2007 20:29

Does he get them on holidays too?
Apparently stress headaches can be worst after the stress is gone - our headteacher, who is prone to them got a real stinker just after OFSTED - she was fine during the inspection, but it was when the stress let go that she went under.

FluffyMummy123 · 03/03/2007 20:30

Message withdrawn

MuminBrum · 03/03/2007 20:31

Early bed, no looking at screens unless absolutely essential (TV/computer), fresh air, exercise, positive thinking. If they are migraines he could try asking the GP for Imigran or one of the newer migraine remedies - they work like magic for many migraineurs.

Original poster

emkana · 03/03/2007 20:32

It's tricky for him to get exercise, he leaves the house at 7.30 am, commutes to work by car and there's no other way to get there (workplace is in the middle of nowhere), gets in at 6 pm, then we eat together with the kids, then he helps put them to bed, when all this is done it's 7.30 pm and I can understand that he can't be bothered then...

he should do more at the weekend, and I think he would probably feel better if he got up earlier at the weekend, but he thinks more sleep is the way to go...

OP posts:

FluffyMummy123 · 03/03/2007 20:33

Message withdrawn

MuminBrum · 03/03/2007 20:34

I think you're right, he needs to get to bed and get up at a reasonable hour at the weekend, but I completely appreciate that it is very hard to encourage another adult to do this! As for exercise, could he go for a brisk walk at lunchtime, or is his workplace not in an environment where this would be possible?

FluffyMummy123 · 03/03/2007 20:35

Message withdrawn

Original poster

emkana · 03/03/2007 20:43

It's nice though that he's there every night to eat with us and to help with bedtime... sigh...

He could go for a walk at lunchtime, if he wasn't so bloody lazy - he prefers going on Amazon I believe.

OP posts:

KTeePee · 04/03/2007 10:13

Why's he staying up so late during the week if he has to get up early in the morning? - think this is adding to the problems tbh - can see if he is stressed he may find it hard to get to sleep but it's not fair on you if he then spends the whole weekend in bed "catching up".

Agree he needs to do some exercise and that on the way home from work would be good - if you can cope without him being there for children's bedtime a couple of nights.

Catbabymummy · 04/03/2007 10:20

Does he drink a lot of coffee during the week? I had this problem as well, I also have a stressful job and drank 3-4 mugs of industrial strength coffee during the week, but only had the odd cup of tea at the weekend. Then by Saturday teatime I would have a banging headache. Once I cut down on the coffee during the week, I was getting far less headaches. Basically I was undergoing caffeine withdrawl every weekend....

MrsJohnCusack · 04/03/2007 10:34

this happens to my DH, but not so much since I managed to get him to stick to these rules:

drink LOTS AND LOTS of water every day. Not other drinks, water
do not sleep for too long - guaranteed headache (used to happen to me too - sleeping in for ages at the weekend made me feel absolutely dreadful)
get fresh air and exercise as often as possible. Boring, but it works
get OUT of the office at lunchtime - this is absolutely essential. Do NOT stay sitting at the computer. Go out for a walk
check caffeine consumption and reduce as much as possible - and drink more or less the same amount each day, don't vary it wildly day to day or drink much less at the weekend. Ditto alcohol.

All this should help, but obviously the stress is also a factor that need to be looked at - when stressed, all of the above will help though.

used to happen to me often at weekends - as soon as the source of the stress (work) was removed a hideous headache would ensue. Took me ages to get DH to do all this, but he has had to grudgingly agree that it's really worked (and makes out it's all his idea as well...)

Surfermum · 04/03/2007 10:40

If it's a stress headache Syndol, which you can buy over the counter, are fantastic. I get them when I get stressed because I tense my shoulders and jaw and that knots up the muscles in my neck, resulting in a pounding headache. I used to have to go to bed with them as I couldn't function until someone recommended Syndol. Take one and 20 mins later they take effect.

I'm another who gets them after the event. I cope with the stressor, relax and then bang!

sandcastles · 04/03/2007 11:09

Does he get neck/shoulder/back aches with the headaches?

Do his teeth & jaw hurt?

Possible he could be clenching/grinding? Could it be that Friday/Saturday night he is letting go of all the stress hence grinding/clenching?

Mercy · 04/03/2007 11:15

Could it be migraines?

Some people get them only at the weekend, after work etc.

I went through a phase of getting them everyday after school when I was in the 6th form. I had to see my GP, keep a diary and was prescribed medication (short term)

3littlefrogs · 04/03/2007 12:25

Absolutely agree with everything Mrs JC said. My husband used to be like this every weekend too. Running on adrenalin all week then incapacitated with headache all day Saturday and half of Sunday. You feel sorry for them, but it really spoils the family's weekend.

mosschops30 · 04/03/2007 12:51

sounds like a tension headache, has he tried taking syndol or boots own brand for tension are very good.

maybe he could try some sort of relaxation on a friday night with a tape or breathing exercises/hot bath etc

Catbabymummy · 04/03/2007 14:07

Syndol is very good however it always makes me drowsy. I too suffer from migraines but they tend to hormonal though stress makes them worse.

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