Lacies, elephants, potato-based snacks... Whatever we are, this is our 57th CANCER SUPPORT THREAD

[WhatWouldLeslieKnopeDo]

Welcome everyone to another cancer support thread. This thread is open to anyone with any sort of cancer. And we have plenty of hands to hold if you're undergoing tests for cancer. We are always pleased to wave people off with an all clear, and there's plenty of room here if the news isn't what you hope for.

So don't be shy! We are a friendly bunch and there's probably someone who has been through something similar. Nothing is off limits here. Scream, shout, swear, stamp your feet...

I'm sorry that anyone needs this thread, but very glad that it's here. Cancer is shit. But it's a little bit less shit when you have people to share it with.

Our previous thread is here

the questions i always ask is

what else should i be doing/what questions should i be asking!

ive just had a phone call from the plastic surgeon - shes cancelling my reconstruction on monday until the urologist have given me the all clear

they have emailed her and said they want more scans of my kidneys plus my lungs now

i dont know whether to be impressed with how the nhs has sprung into action or pissed off that all of this has happened without me knowing - the phone call i had on friday was to confirm the appointment time!

It's good to have a notebook with you for appointments so you can remember what to ask and jot down the response. I must admit that I haven't always done that and am now not comfortable with some of the information I've been given so I intend to address that.
I have left a message for the BCN to call me and also requested copies of the consultants letters which have been sent to my GP. I may also be requesting a copy of my MDT notes. My main worry is the conflicting information and the fact that one consultant seemed incredibly vague about my case and couldn't answer any questions that I asked. It feels very like the left hand doesn't know what the right hand is doing which is a bit of a worry as it's my life in their hands.

Oh baubles that sounds like a lot to cope with ,it's upsetting to have things altered and more tests arranged .

user I'd just add that of course you don't feel strong enough to cope with all this .It's too much . If you think about it ,who would ?

I hope you've not bought all this "being brave and fighting cancer " stuff . Why should people be expected to be brave rather than terrified ?

All you can do is put one foot in front of the other ,ask for help ( like sleeping tablets from the GP ) if you possibly can and let us all try and get you through is .

user you are strong enough. You will cope. To be blunt, you don't really have a choice. None of us do. We are all just muddling through as best we can. I know we keep saying it, but it will feel a bit easier when you don't have the scan results hanging over you

Take it minute by minute if you need to. Use whatever distraction techniques work for you.

And yes to what gingeroots says about all the "fighting" bollocks!

baubles do you have an appointment for the scan? I hope they can explain what's going on at tomorrow's appointment

chewing can you request not to see that consultant again? My team copy me in to their letters. I assumed that was standard practice. I'm sure you can request that they copy you in in future. I hope you get satisfactory answers to your questions

I hope everyone is having a good evening

chewing - good for you ,though I'm sorry you're having to use so much energy to get information you should have .

user I just want to say that if you're falling apart ,crying ,necking gin ,neglecting your family - you won't be the first or last . I know I've been there .Though gin was not my tipple of choice .

leslie when is your next chemo starting ?

Hi Leslie
It doesn't appear to be standard practice here - we have to specifically request copies of any letters. I am seeing a different consultant this week so have loads of questions I would like answered. Not least will be finding out more about the 'special meeting' discussing me that was held at a different hospital but seemingly not recorded on my notes. I am hoping the BCN will call me in the morning as they are usually pretty quick to get back to me when I have left messages before.

ginger I am like a dog with a bone when I'm after information I don't want to be a PITA but I don't think it's unreasonable to ask the questions.

Blimey necking gin?! I've been too terrified to drink anything other than water as someone told me alcohol feeds cancer cells and a list of so many 'bad' foods that I've barely eaten anything since Friday!

chewing - I'm really surprised that you're not copied into letters to your GP .Like leslie I thought that was standard .

You absolutely should be given details ,I hate people knowing stuff about me that I don't know .

And it's important that the "patient" has all the info - it often seems to me that they're the only one who does .
Doctors ,nurses in different departments frequently seem unaware of what's happened outside their shere and are unaware of the whole picture . They don't have time ,or can't get into the right bit of the computer .
And often things get put into notes that aren't correct ,are based on assumptions of what they think you've said re symptoms or SE .

You go girl!

user - ah the mire that is what one should eat/not eat etc .

All I can say - balanced diet ,your body needs to be well nourished .

sorry about the gin reference ,didn't mean to imply that you'd turned into an alcoholic overnight .Just trying to reassure you about not having to be strong or " cope" . Whatever gets you through is coping in my book .

Don't apologise, I've been tempted by wine but too scared!
Maybe tomorrow I will allow myself

I wouldn't be surprised if it's because of a cost issue ginger
My information leaflet about the chemo I'm having says that I should avoid alcohol. I do generally but sometimes you just have to think f* it and enjoy a glass or two.

chewing I can't imagine the cost of the letters makes much difference compared to the costs of all the chemo drugs and surgery and stuff but whatever their reason I hope they'll start copying you in in future.

user unless your oncologist gives you specific dietary advice then as ginger says, just stick to a balanced diet. When you're having chemo you might find you can only stomach certain foods. There's no point making your life miserable by cutting out things you enjoy! Same with alcohol. I don't drink so I don't pay attention to the alcohol advice. But I'm sure it's alright in moderation. Especially when you are stressed at the moment. Whatever gets you through this time (within reason!). Whoever gave you the list sounds a bit unhelpful, frankly. You need love and support at the moment, not additional things to worry about.

I often share this link to the Cancer Research UK science blog on cancer myths. It covers some of the popular dietary bollocks :)

ginger next chemo due on Thursday :) though I have an infected toenail so it might not go ahead I suppose. I've had an extra week off this cycle and it's been lovely. I've felt really quite healthy a lot of the time! I hope you are doing OK

I hope everyone gets a good night's sleep

Morning, I have my pet scan this morning and I'm really frightened it will show up sinister findings.
This thread has been a lifeline during my dark moments, please keep your fingers crossed for me it goes ok.
I need all the positivity I can get.

Good morning useristired my thoughts and prayers are with you. Is anybody going along with you?

Yes I have someone coming with me which I wasn't going to do but maybe it's a good thing.

Yes it is a good decision. I will be sending you tonnes of positive vibes.
You can do this.
You have to and you will.

Useristired. Just about to leave for the hospital too and I'll be thinking about you. Believe me, if I can do it, so can you. I've got Coward stamped through me like a stick of rock !!!

Morning Lacies. Hope it's a good day.

Hi is there a similar support thread for those supporting a loved one with cancer?

Penfold there was one. I'm not sure if it's still running. It will be in either General Health or Life limiting illness. Otherwise I'm sure if you start one it would be popular, there seem to be a lot of people in the same position

There is this thread for those supporting relatives with life limiting diseases, including cancer there are also quite a few threads in that topic by people whose relatives have cancer

Good luck today useristired I hope it goes smoothly

Thank you

Tutti did you manage to sort out the appointment clash? Good luck with whichever appointment you are going to!

Good luck to all those at hospital today. Hope everything goes as well as possible