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Should I take a friend?

16 replies

rocket74 · 18/08/2016 11:27

I have a referral for a breast appointment next week as I have a lump in my breast. I am thinking its a cyst or blocked duct. I hope. I'm expecting tests and to be there about three hours? Should I go to this appointment by myself or do people generally take someone? My DH will have both kids but I could ask a friend? I don't want to put someone out or waste their time. I'm quite good at doing stuff on my own - but what if the news isn't good.
I'm also reluctant to tell too many people and cause any worry.

OP posts:
PollyPerky · 18/08/2016 12:54

Sorry to hear about your appt.

I think the decision has to be yours. How would you feel it it were bad news? Can your DH not find another person to look after the children- a friend?- then he could go with you?

rocket74 · 18/08/2016 13:58

It's early in the morning 8.30 and my DS has SEN so it's difficult to get care - friends aren't really able to care for him. I might try and do some juggling but I feel it's making it more than I hope it is. I could do without the stress of getting both kids and DH up and out the house by 8am as well!!! . We live in a city so traffic is difficult.

OP posts:
PollyPerky · 18/08/2016 15:01

Okay. I think you have to work on the idea of how you would cope if told it was cancer. They will discuss a treatment plan. Are you confident you can absorb it all if you are in a state of shock or distress? This is what you need to focus on. Sorry to be so blunt but it all depends on how you think you would cope. Could you ask your DH to be there at the end of the appt? If you have been told it could be 3 hours (I'd phone and ask beforehand so you know) could he come to collect you? You seem to be a bit in the dark about what to expect- are they doing an ultrasound, biopsy, drainage of cyst if that's what it is? has your GP suggested it's a cyst or a duct? or are you just hoping?

rocket74 · 18/08/2016 15:40

The GP did suggest it was a cyst - but then seemed pretty keen to get me an appointment within the two weeks.
I haven't been told exactly what will happen - the leaflet and letter suggest that initial scan will then dictate what other tests I will need. Hence anywhere between 1 and 3 hours.
I am trying all options to get cover for the kids so DH can be around even if he comes later.

OP posts:
PollyPerky · 18/08/2016 16:00

Do you have a good friend who can come with you? Or maybe come at some point even if not for 8.30am?

NavyandWhite · 18/08/2016 16:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Nousernameforme · 18/08/2016 16:27

If it is the first referral and they haven't said that it will be this and that test I would imagine it would just be a specialist taking a look with a complete medical history and then booking in other tests. The three hours are to allow for a long waiting time as well as the actual appointment.
I haven't had this but i am basing it on people i know who have been checked for various cancers first appointment.
I hope it turns out to be nothing.

NavyandWhite · 18/08/2016 16:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

chewingawasp · 18/08/2016 17:26

I was told to take someone with me as I would get the results on the day. I didn't and was booked in to have a biopsy a few days later although consultant said he didn't think it was anything major ( I thought otherwise). My dsis had travelled a couple of hundred miles to attend for nothing but we had a lunch out instead.
I think if they can confirm its a cyst or something benign on the day they will tell you. If they're not sure they usually want further tests. Good luck.

sadie9 · 18/08/2016 17:30

When I went to the Breast Clinic I went alone, as were most of the women there. There will be other women there in the same boat. And all of you terrified.
If it were me I'd go on my own, and then ring for someone at the end if you need to. Sounds like its more stress to get the kids minded. I always am more reassured by DH to be at home minding the kids, rather than having to worry about him being really stressed at appts with me AND worry if the kids are okay. The staff are really nice and take care of you really well, you won't feel like you are alone.
Chances are all will be fine! You could take a couple of paracetamol an hour before the appt as I find the mammograms a bit uncomfortable, but the paracetamol takes the edge of it if you are a wuss like me. The waiting will be over soon. Best of luck with it.

rocket74 · 18/08/2016 20:43

Thanks for the advice all.
I think I will go alone - I've gone in for operations (day surgery) and a biopsy on my throat on the past so I know I can cope.
The paracetamol is a good idea - I'm not a wuss particularly !!! but I will do this if it helps.
I did ask a very good friend but she has a meeting that day she cannot change - but other than her - I think I'll be ok by myself.

OP posts:
chewingawasp · 18/08/2016 21:33

Bear in mind that the large majority of the referrals are benign Flowers

maisiejones · 19/08/2016 18:45

Nousername, that's not really the correct info. Most breast clinics now do a 'one stop' system whereby you have all the tests on the day. Therefore, mammogram, ultrasound, biopsy, result, in that order. Hence the number of hours required.

rocket74 · 25/08/2016 22:53

Hello all - thanks again for advice last week.
So I went alone which I was totally fine with.
I had a first examination followed by a mammogram and ultrasound. These seemed to prove inconclusive so I had a biopsy. They took 3 samples. Nothing really hurt but a bit uncomfortable I guess. But they still don't know what it is Confused. I think the main consultant was called in.
They told me that normally they can tell clearly whether it's something to worry about, or not to worry about. But they couldn't tell me. So now I have to wait 2 weeks for the results. I'm not really sure where my head is at with it all.

OP posts:
mrsrhodgilbert · 26/08/2016 07:29

Hi rocket, there is a thread called lacies for cancer support which could be very helpful for you right now. chewing who answered above is already on it and has had a difficult time getting a diagnosis. It's a very friendly chatty thread and between us we have lots of experience. Come along and say hello if you would like some help.

chewingawasp · 26/08/2016 08:38

I second what mrsrhod has said. There's a lovely bunch of supportive, helpful ladies on that thread Smile

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