right, i was just cleaning the worktop in the kitchen and found 3 of peters pills. heres the problem

[misdee]

he doesnt remember dropping them or not taking them. 2 were heart drugs, carvidilol and something else, and a multi vitamin. I have also found pills on the floor before which again, he doesnt remember dropping or not taking.

i dont know what to do really.

and obviously we have 3 young children, i dont want them taking heart meds at all!

Eeek. Were they definitely not there yesterday? Or could he have forgotten them a previous day?

thats the thing, i dont know, its my junk worktop. so could;ve been there a week or so. (its just where he takes his meds, toolbox and stereo is.) but he cant be missing taking his pills.

Eek. Nasty one. Could you keep his pills in a specific place? Or use a dispenser so he only takes out the exact dose he needs at any one time? I keep my medicine on a very high shelf that even I can't reach without climbing because I am paranoid about ds finding it.

I think you may need to make a chart for taking pills I have had to because I can and do forget at times aswell as having taken the3m twice on a few occasions which is dreadful.If any of your children had taken adult dose carvidilol you would know about it

They wont have.

DS has lived with my two heart tablets every day since he was born five years ago.

I dropped a tablet behind the bathroom scales last week, meant to pick it up, school run forgot.

He handed it to me the next day.

This is not 5 year old behaviour, he totally understands and always has done.

Even as a toddler he knew they were yakky doodles.

HTH

Won't help just now I know, but can you get one of those medicine dispenser things marked with each day (you can get them divided up further than that if for eg he needs to take three lots in a day). Would help then to know if he's missed any (though not if he's dropped any and not noticed, admittedly!)

he has one of those boxes and sort out his pills for the week on a sunday. each time his alarm goes off, he transfer them to a white paper pot and takes his pills. he swears there has always been the right amount in there. BUT he says he takes 2 at a time, but he cant see how one could;ve fallen from his mouth without him knowing. but i do think thats whats possibly happened.

the box of pills is kept locked up in his mediine cabinet unless he sorting them out or actually taking them.

its the dropping and not knowing that is scariing me.

sherlock, dd1 is like that, but dd2 isnt, and dd3 definatly isnt, the kid eats crayons fgs!

Ah right I see. But he has been v. poorly/groggy/sleeping a lot recently; although worrying it's not really surprising if he has dropped some and not realised.

You coud either you make sure you're watching him taking them (surreptitiously perhaps!) - or go and have a quick look round after he's had them just to see if he's dropped any.

he has a poor memory anyway since his stroke. he tells me stuff over and over. so i know he has dropped them as i dont touch his pills. i did offer to take over it tonight if he would let me. he looked really upset that he has done this.

That's what I was thinking - poor guy, there's so little he can do at the moment anyway, and to realise he can't even manage to take his pills by himself .... hence why I suggested watching him surreptitiously (I'm sure I've spelt that wrong!!).

i know, i feel thatby offering i have said i dont trust him to do it.

sorry honey, am not doing a good job of cheering you up here!

misdee - it must be a terrible worry.
There are a few things to consider, aren't there?

1.Obviously Peter needs his medication
2.Equally obviously there is NO WAY you can risk the girls taking one of his tablets.
3.But maybe not so obvious - he is suffering such major sh*t and it must be really important for him to feel valued and with some measure of hope that there will be a positive outcome to all this.

So somehow you need to meet the first 2 absolutes whilst remaining deferential to the 3rd point?

I don't know... I feel awful even trying to offer any kind of advice for this nightmare. You're the ones who are living it but I think you must like to hear opinions or you wouldn't ask?

You're doing a lot already - he sorts his pills and has an alarm. Hard to know what you can do without 'interfering'. But no1 priority must be to keep your little ones safe.

misdee - just read your last post... he must have a lot of trust towards you - you've done your best right through all this. Can you somehow say that you need to help him till he gets his transplant? Would that seem more positive - it's not that you don't trust him - you only need to help out while he's in his current state.
Or would it feel too much as though you were crossing some barrier that can never be undone?

Can't you work on training hte children? SOrry I can't remember how young your youngest is but I know a family where there have been drugs in the fridge and/or left lying around since the children were tiny but since they could understand the children have been drilled. (Their situation is due to blindness, disorganisation and complete exhaustion of various family members - and very little outside help.)

Hope you can do something.

even after his transplant, he will need a heck of a lot of drugs and the effect of his stroke will still be there.

Think your youngest is 3? Is that right misdee?
Could he maybe always take his pills in the bathroom? Then you could do the 'never eat anything from the bathroom floor' routine. Even very little ones would understand that. Would also be easy for you to scan the floor regularly as it would be a small room.
Clutching at straws, I know.

bathroom is full of medical equipment.

youngest is 23months.

Do you have a 'best plan' of your own?

no, i just dont know what to do. i guess as long as we remember to keep the kitchen gate shut then it'll be fine, but dd1+2 can open the gate to the kitchen, but dont always shut it after.

When my ds1 could open the gate to the kitchen I got a combination lock from Halford's. It was a bit of a pain, though.
How about you show them what daddy's pills look like and say if they ever find one they must bring it straight to you and you'll swap it for a reward. Maybe even make a game of it? Would that get the message home?
Sorry - just don't know what else to suggest.