Feel crap for feeling crap

[iklboo]

I have (they think) Vestibular Neuronitis, a kind of extreme vertigo. I was off work 9 weeks in Jan, had a diagnosis & discharged back to GP but have relapsed twice. I have now been off another four weeks & have been re-referred to ENT for further tests. Awaiting an appointment.

I'm supposed to be going back to work on Thursday when sick note runs out but yesterday I started feeling really ill again. Slept most of today.

I'm fed up of feeling ill. I'm terrified I'll lose my job (although I'm being dealt with under 'long term conditions' policy) and I can tell my line manager is getting fed up despite what she says about making sure I'm well before I return to work. DH must be pissed off by now as well.

I don't know what to do anymore. Can't afford private for earlier appointments. Feel like I have to go into work or I'm letting everyone down on one hand, feel like crawling under the covers & crying on the other.

Could you get another sick note?

Alternatively, could you talk to work and see if they can reduce your workload temporarily or allow you to work from home?? I've had something similar and I sympathise. It IS horrible. I did get medication for it and it did help a bit.

Try Cawthorne Cooksey exercises. I had hideous labyrinthitis for months and they really sorted it

I've got the exercises, but they're doing bugger all unfortunately. I could get another sick note, but I really hate being off sick. And I don't look ill, which makes it look like I'm taking the piss.

I'll be having a return to work meeting on Thursday when I go back so I'll have a chat about maybe a phased return or reduced hours for a bit. Finally got a referral for the end of November.