I had two thrombosed external haemerrhoids when I was 8 months pregnant - they were extremely painful, much much worse than childbirth. I went to 3 GPs (Easter weekend so couldn't see my normal doc), first was absolutely useless and gave me suppositories and told me to get an anal cream from the chemist. Went back to my GP as I was getting worse and she sent me straight to a colorectal surgeon. He saw me and refused to treat it as he said I was too close to giving birth. That took 8 mins and cost $280. One thing he did recommend was Xylocaine jelly, a topical anaesthetic. Get this at the chemist and ask for the highest strength they have (I didn't need a script)
I then told a friend who told me she'd had them too (things ppl don't talk about re pregnancy!!!) And her gp had excised them for her. So I went there in urgency and had them excised, meaning local anaesthetic injected with 2 needles (horrifically painful for those moments) and she scraped out the blood clots from the giant grapes that surrounded what used to be a normal butthole. I really recommend this as it gave me instant relief after days of pain to the point of tears and inability to sit or do anything other than lie in bed.
That was 8 months ago and I now have a ginormous 7 mth baby and until last week, a set of ginormous skin tags to match.
The ASTs were really bothering me hygiene-wise, and I was very embarrassed so sex hasn't been the same though my husband insists he's not at all deterred. I went to see a different (!) Colorectal surgeon a few weeks ago and his bedside manner was much better and he told me it was a simple procedure. Last week I had the operation. I didn't know what to expect so I'll add my experience in this too.
I was an outpatient in a day hospital - checked in at 2 pm. Had my husband drop me off and he was told I would be 3 hrs and he would be called an hour prior to when he needed to escort me (escorts required in order to be discharged as driving not ok and fall risk etc).
I was taken by a nurse to change and remove my watches etc and given a beautiful backless gown. I was then taken to see the anaesthetist who was a bit gruff, I had to ask him what his plan was as he wasn't forthcoming - apparently the choice of anaesthesia depends on whether they can operate while you're on your side or they need fuller access to tape your bum open so you're on your tummy. So it depends on what your surgeon does. I was put in a bed and wheeled to a treatment area where nurses were busy and I fell asleep briefly until someone came to ask if I'd had an enema. I thought I had escaped this but sadly no. I eventually had a nurse who was a former resident of a communist nation shove Me on my side and bark at me to pull my knees to my chest while she inserted the enema. If you don't know what this is, it's a warm liquid they fill you with that makes you empty your bowels rapidly. She told me to hold it as long as I could and when I asked how long that range tended to be she barked EVERYONE DIFFERENT. Thanks for that. It took me about 3-5 mins I would say to run to the loo and empty like i had food poisoning while backpacking in South East Asia. I cleaned myself as best as I could and hopped back into the bed and was then wheeled to the theatre. Anaesthetist jabbed me three times before finding a vein for the cannula, administered happy stuff and then they had an oxygen mask on my face and I was out like a light.
The next thing I knew the barking nurse was barking at me to WAKE UP. That's about as pleasant as it sounds...she yelled my husband's phone number and called him, barked at him ONE HOUR and there I was. I was quite cold as tends to happen under general.
Eventually I was told to get up and walk to a chair where I was given sandwiches and tea by a much gentler nurse. Watched miss Marple and read a magazine i had brought and changed into my civilian clothes. Anaesthetist and doc both saw Me and said it was fine and out I went off home with some opioid Painkillers.
I'm 7 days on and haven't taken any pain medication. First BM was 12 hr after and was loose (remnants of enema?) And painless. I've eaten my normal diet since and had bleeding each time. Mucus and light bleeding seems to be the pattern so I've been wearing pantiliners and pads. BMs every day now and they're much more painful than the first as there is no anaesthesia! I have a warm salt bath on the go straight after as it is eye watering pain. Still nothing compared to the original thrombosed haemerrhoids!
My surgery was a simple excision, no stitches. I looked straight after the dressing came off the following day and it looks back to normal, which I'm v happy about! Now just hoping the painful BMs subside asap as well as the light bleeding.