Tiredness - how much is normal for parents of under 5's, and how do you know if tiredness levels are beyond normal?

[scoobysnax]

How much tiredness is normal and expected for parents of young children, would you say, and how do you know if you are more tired than is normal and should get medical advice?
Hard to define, I know, but I was wondering if others could help me build up a view of what is normal for parents over 30?

Tiredness makes me irritable and judgemental

namechanger ?

too knackered to spell your new name

if in fact it is a new name, If not then just too lazy

who d you think I am, what was my old name?

only had this one.

I know its a silly one, but just like to pre-empt my obtuse opinions

I don't know
I'm a bit tired right now so sorry if I have offended you

S'ok,you haven't this is where we come to offload our spagetti brains.

I only ask because someone asked me before if I had changed my name - thought there was a conspiracy.

Conspiracy theories etc...... effect of lack of sleep. Infact I should be, my 3 month old is sleeping like the proverbial, so I should follow suit.

Clary , come back, how do you do it? A full time job, three kids, you do chores and have the time and energy to write to mumsnet. Please can I be you?

Dunravin, actually I write on mumsnet at work! (shh) tho as of now (today!) have internet at home so now will certainly get no more chores done
How do I do it? Well, wanted lots of kids so cannot complain; have complex childcare dance that DH and I do (I get up early, he drops off am, I pick up some pms, he is off this day, me that day etc). All are good sleepers as I said, just do chores when I can (house very untidy but at least everyone is fed and in clean, ironed clothes). Would describe myself as "busy" but not tired.

I think being knackered is just part of parenthood. I was a SAHM, and my cleaning lady came one half day a week. Everyone congratulated me that my ds was such a good sleeper (only since reading posts on here have I realised that we were truly blessed, never had to walk him about at night, no trouble with teething or stuff).

When ds was 15 months I got him into nusery 2 afternoons per week (Tues and Thurs). You know what I did with those afternoons? I slept! and those extra 2 - 3 hours twice a week did make a huge difference. Scooby, try taking EVERY opportunity you have to sleep. get some childcare if you can afford it just to give yourself a break and sleep. If children are napping, YOU NAP. Sod the ironing or whatever needs doing, catch up on your sleep whenever and wherever you can.

If you try this and find that you NEVER feel any better for it, then try your G.P.

But don't try the trick so many of us did when we became mothers, of keeping your domestic and social standards up, using valuable sleep time to do it. Guiding a new life into the ways of the world, and doing it properly is an energetic, no draining , business. Be kind to yourself, and catch up when you get the chance.

Thinking about this I do think eating and drinking choices make my lifestyle a bit easier ie busy not tired...I don't drink alcohol since, when pg with DS1, I felt so much better not drinking; ditto coffee (never drank tea anyway); also drink a lot of water (1.5l/day at least). I know this all makes me a bit odd (esp not drinking coffee or tea, my MIL thinks i'm crazy i'm sure) but it does make me feel better and more energetic. Oh and don't forget to eat, yes it sounds daft but a friend with lots of children is always tired and I'm sure she's stopped eating too (getting very thin...) This is no help of course for those with bad sleepers!

scoobysnax - I guess that many of us would say being very tired is a "normal" part of parenting but somehow that makes is seem ok or less of a big deal than it can be at times. I reckon it is a bit of a red herring to think of it as "normal". While it is comforting to think that you aren?t the only one and that it is a typical part of parenting, extreme tiredness that comes after endless broken sleep and constant demands and worry feels anything but "normal" - more like "horrific sleep deprivation that is sadly commonplace" (not nit picking, just tired and not prepared to think of it being ok becuase it is just one of those parenting things - it is a big deal and I am going to moan about it!

Hi scoobysnax and all the other tired mamas out there

Just thought you might be interested to know that I got my thyroid levels checked recently and it turns out, surprise surprise, that mine is on the underactive side.
With medication I will get the balance redressed and have increased energy levels and the tiredness will reduce significantly.

I was so happy when the doctor told me this I cried. There is light at the end of the tunnel - I don't HAVE to feel absolutely knackered at three o'clock every day, I can get my life back and have the energy to drive and take my kids out!

And have the energy to sort out the baby's night time routine, too.

So go and see your GP and ask for you thyroid activity levels to be checked, it's just a blood test.

Hi Suzywong - caught up with htis form the other thread - I am going to visit my GP coz I'm convinced thigs aren't quite right. I'm forever getting colds, feel tired and drained. As an example: Easter weekend was laid low with achy body, headache and then went on to get full blown "heavy" cold. 3 weeks ago I started again, had 2 weeks of achy body, head achy, tired and drained, temperature and then a week ago started this v. heavy cold. I am still full of cold, gone form tickly cough to chesty cough, sore tounge, can't breathe and even when I have I've lost my sense of smell. Even when I'm better I know it will only be a couple of weeks before I "get it agian"...anyway, sorry to have moaned.
I am so gald to hear that you have solved your problem - hope the medicatio kicks in quickly!!.
I'll look out for you onthe loose a stone thread!

thanks Sonnet
Blimey all that doesn't sound like much fun at all, I'm sure your GP will suggest a blood test for your endocrinology (a new word I learned today).

Best of luck

Glad it's been picked up mrs Wong .

Hi Suzy, I notice that Sonnet said she'd see you on the lose a stone thread. Just wondered if you knew that with an underactive thyroid your metabolism is slower therefore you are prone to weight gain. Forgive me if a) I'm jumping to conclusions or b) you knew that anyway, but thought it may be of interest to you!
I'm totally pooped (to use a Balamory phrase) just now as ds has for the past 4 nights decided to wake in the middle of the night for play time.
Makes you begin to dread the night.

thanks for you concern Posey, I did raise this with my GP and she said I was doing very well, in that case.

Why oh why do they do it? (the kids that is....)