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weight/in the wrong body

10 replies

Rongbody · 10/03/2015 19:16

I've battled my weight for years and had good periods and bad periods -11.6st-15.5st @5ft7.

I'm living well right now: don't drink or smoke, don't eat processed foods, low carb, I'm active, can walk up steep hills no problem, job that involves no sitting down, lifting weights etc, like gym every day. and yet my BMI is 29.3, almost official obesity.

I can live with it, I'm not that fat actually, I carry it well. Nobody would see me coming down the street and pick me out as obese or anything.

But I really feel like I'm in the wrong body. I have a figure some would be jealous of, all bum and tits. Really jubbly and voluptuous. I don't want it though, I want to be really toned and androgenousy. I have felt, up to now, that if I was just 'good' enough I would get there, just a case of diet and exercise. But now I'm pushing 30 and doing all the right things and nothing doing, I just feel frump beckoning. Unless I live like a MONK, this is it. I'm quite feminist and know that I should celebrate my curves and this is how women are meant to be but I just have a sad voice in my head saying "no - other women, not me..."

I think this is more my shape than my weight IYSWIM and I cant be happy thinking about it - where can I go for help with this? GP? Does counselling for such a thing exist?

OP posts:
2lol2lol · 10/03/2015 19:34

Body Dysmorphia, maybe?

Phoenixfrights · 10/03/2015 19:49

Are you very muscly?

Other than that .... are you perhaps eating large portions or drinking lots of wine or something ?[clutches at straws]

And have you ever been tested for hypothyroidism?

Rongbody · 10/03/2015 19:49

yeah, I think so...I just cant accept this is me - when I look in the mirror and see curves, it makes me sad, if I dont look then I just carry on believing whats in my mind - delusional!

can you get over dysmorphia? :(

OP posts:
Rongbody · 10/03/2015 19:50

nope no wine, barely ever drink and yes I maybe have muscle under the hips because of my work and that's heavy, but I'm not sporty muscly like I'd like to be....

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Rongbody · 10/03/2015 19:51

not been tested for hyperthyroidism - guessing I can ask GP for that. worried that I'm just going to instantly burst into floods of tears if I try telling a GP this tbh

OP posts:
2lol2lol · 10/03/2015 19:52

Quick Google says that CBT can effectively treat body dysmoprphia. It's worth a try? Must be some online self-help fora, too.

2lol2lol · 10/03/2015 19:52

Xpost... GP has heard it all, believe me! You'll have to hit a much higher bar to shock them.

Rongbody · 10/03/2015 19:56

its not the shock its just the..i dunno, crying woman thing

OP posts:
2lol2lol · 10/03/2015 21:51

Don't think weepers are unusual in GP surgery, either.
I browsed here & thought you might relate.
I guess main thing is you must believe that you can do something to make things better.

Rongbody · 10/03/2015 22:49

I will join the forum, I guess its the lack of things left to try that gets to me, like I'm stuck with this. If I make anymore changes to my diet I'm sentencing myself to a life of being one of those awful food bores..you know the ones. It really is an obsession, but isnt getting me anywhere.

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