Lap on Monday, really anxious, come hold my hand?

[IKnitSoIDontKill]

I have a laparoscopy booked for Monday finally after 2 years of pelvic pain and infertility, to look for endometriosis. My surgeon is great, and as surgeries go it's relatively minor, although still a GA. I am just massively anxious about it.

I am a survivor of repeated rape and sexual abuse by my ex husband and the thought of being unconscious with loads of strangers brings me out in a cold sweat. The loss of control, people messing with my body etc is the bit I am finding hard to deal with. I haven't had a chance to tell my consultant this yet- I can barely say the word rape out loud and don't know what they could do to help anyway. Is it worth mentioning it to the surgeon or anesthetist? I had a ptsd related breakdown last year and the anxiety about the surgery is making me worse, and I'm worried I'll cry or have a panic attack and make a total idiot of myself.

I'm stressing about the recovery too, since they don't know how much work will need to be done until they have a look, so it could be a few days or it could be weeks. And I'm not sure what I am most scared of, them finding nothing, or them finding extensive endometriosis that has totally fucked my fertility. It doesn't help that nobody knows about the infertility (my family are awful complicated) so I don't really have any support, apart from dp who has heard it a million times.

I am driving myself crazy worrying about it all. Please can someone kindly tell me to get a grip?

I am not going to tell you to get a grip as it isn't as easy as that is it? After everything you have been through it is natural that you are anxious.
I have had seven laparoscopies over the last 30 years due to endometriosis. I have occasionally thought about how undignified it all is but you have to remember that the theatre team will be doing loads of these procedures everyday. You will have a camera passed through a tiny cut near your belly button and another one a little lower down. Presumably you are covered in a theatre sheet with just your belly exposed. Afterwards you wake up in recovery and are then taken back to the ward on your bed. You will feel a bit sore behind your belly button and will probably have period-like pains and a bit of bleeding. I always found that the worst pain was in my shoulders which is where the gas collects that they use to inflate the tummy. Apparently peppermint oil tablets helps - I chose to have morphine which was lovely!

I do think that you should tell the nurse about your fears when you are checked in. You could even print out what you have written here if that would be easier?

You will be fine. This time next week you will be through it all and back to normal.

Oh and I had two children!

Hi, I've just been told I've got to have my second lap later this month due to endometriosis. This time round I'm much calmer. I suffer from anxiety and panic attacks and was worrying like crazy last time. One of the best things that you can do is talk to them when you get there and tell them you are nervous/scared. Ask all the questions you have -no matter how daft you think you will sound - they have probably heard them all before. Hospitals are quite used to people being nervous.(although nervous was a bit of an understatement for me!). It might help to ask who will be looking after you, who will be in the theatre, etc. I think that I did actually cry! They were absolutely wonderful and let my husband stay with me, and come down to the theatre with me until they put me under. Have you got anyone who can go with you and do some hand holding?

As for recovery, last time I had an endo cyst removed, and was told recovery was about 2weeks. It was a few years ago and my memory isn't great, but I don't remember it actually taking that long. I did get to my sons school play a few days later, although I wasn't exactly skipping along. The longest bit of recovery was waiting for the incisions to heal. I also advise you take a pair of jogging trouser with a nice stretchy waist. Go for comfort! My stomach was still like a balloon for several days and there was no way I was getting any of my normal trouser on, so prepare yourself for this. On the plus side most people go home the same day after their op, so even at its worse it isn't a huge deal physically. I'm a huge wimp, so they have booked me in overnight just in case!

Feel free to ask me any other questions and I'll try to answer, I hope it all goes well.

Thanks

I'll have DP with me and he is lovely and excellent at hand holding. It's reassuring that he might be allowed down with me while I'm put under, it's this bit that's really freaking me out as I think I'll panic due to the loss of control and find it quite triggering. I've had some bad experiences in the hospital I am going to so he is geared up to advocate for me if needed (the good surgeon only works in this one hospital, so I have to go there).

My job is medical, so I know all the ins and outs of the surgery, but I'm not sure it helps when you're the patient. I've noticed the staff tend to be more matter of fact and presume I am fine too, which isn't helpful really. It's the emotional stuff I am struggling with.

I already live in maternity trousers since my stomach is bloated a lot of the time, stretchy jogging bottoms will not be a problem! It has actually been a little helpful that today I am in a lot of pain, for the first time in months, so the idea of pain after surgery is not so daunting right now. I don't drive and we don't have a car, and when I am in pain this is really isolating as I find it hard to get out of the house, especially with my 3 year old, which I think is why the recovery is worrying me.

Also, what pain relief were you guys sent home with?

I had a general for a total abdominal hysterectomy plus extras. Honestly, I don't remember a thing about being put under. The last thing I remember is chatting to the nice Aussie anaesthetist in a sort of store room. He told me off for chewing gum! He was putting an epidural in for post-op pain. Much bigger op.

I don't remember coming round in recovery either. Just waking up on the ward feeling happy (don't know what drug I was on!) that it was all over.

I was sent home with high dose paracetamol and ibuprofen and ranitidine to protect my stomach. Just take them regularly, whether you're in pain or not. As Seedy says, it was the wind that hurt more than the incision.

Good luck! It'll be fine!.

I was sent home with tramadol. They were really good at making sure that I had the pain relief that I needed. I didn't need to take too many, I survived mainly on paracetamol and ibuprofen.