Ritalin for mental numbness/apathy/burnt-out-ness?

[kiritekanawa]

Anyone have experience of ritalin/other methylphenidate drugs prescribed as an adult?

I have been feeling mentally numb, apathetic, exhausted, burnt out, for a long time, at least since the beginning of high school. I've also been depressed on and off, and been treated for it. At the moment I'm not depressed.

Until recently I also had intermittent (sometimes quite frequent) periods when my brain felt totally awake, energetic, able to function, and as though it could burn holes in paper because I could concentrate so well. I used those good periods to do well at school and uni, get a PhD, be a (reasonably good) scientist - but in the last few years it has been more and more of a struggle.

Last year I felt appalling almost all year - had about 2 days where my brain worked, spent the rest of the time forcing myself to go to work, procrastinating a lot, going home at night and hiding under the duvet, and sleeping a lot on weekends. This year I've given away the scientist job for something low-powered, which makes it easier, but I don't feel any better.

GP has done blood tests, everything has come back fine (including thyroid/pituitary tests, which are fine by anyone's definition). I exercise a reasonable amount (run about 20 miles a week, cycle, mountain trail runs on weekends); I eat healthily with lots of oily fish, nuts, vegetables, fruit; I am in a stable, committed, loving marriage; we're reasonably financially stable, own our own house, etc..

On the face of it everything should be fine. But I feel absolutely awful.

Would ritalin help?

Has your GP suggested it?

yes. Though it has to be prescribed by a psychiatrist here (not in the UK), and psychs in the public health system will usually only see people with acute mental health symptoms. This isn't acute and I'm clearly functioning as I am capable of exercise, having a part-time job, etc. So I'm having great difficulty getting the GP's attempts at referral to stick. Can't afford to go private, don't have spare hundreds to shell out per appointment (and haven't the spare money for private health insurance either).

If GP has suggested it and is willing to refer to psych, then maybe go ahead and do a trial. Maybe try some over the counter stimulants in the meantime, if you think that might be the answer?

Ds has taken different stimulant meds on and off for ADHD (obv they work in the opposite way for ADHD, and seem to slow everthing down, rather than speeding it up). Some of them are better than others. A lot of parents will trial caffeine boosts etc in advance of meds for ADHD to see if there is any difference in function.

Do you have employment benefits? Not sure where you are, but some employers do provide a psych self referral service?

No employment benefits, no. I work freelance, and get not enough work for not enough money. DH has a proper job, with employer benefits that extend only to him; but as DH is paying for everything, the money doesn't really stretch to getting into private healthcare.

Wish we were back in the UK. The NHS is bloody marvellous, even in its currently totally stretched form. And we had good jobs with employer benefits and pensions there. Life is nice here, but you do wonder what will happen if you get really sick. Very little is funded or available in terms of drugs or other treatments. There really aren't a lot of options and people often die waiting for treatment here.

Think it was just TSH. I asked for all the possible thyroid tests, but got told "this is what's available on the public health system". As usual.

Are you a perfectionist? Do you procrastinate because you can't see a way to do it perfectly? Do you 'hide' from things that need done by being 'busy'?

stargirl, no. I'm too tired to be a perfectionist. And have always been too interested in stuff to give much of a toss about the finished product.

Procrastinating was more because I can't think through this brain fog, and can't concentrate. ADHD inattentive form sums it up pretty well, though I also have (diagnosed) Asperger;s.