arm in a sling - any tips on how to manage? family seem to think we can carry on as usual, but I have a chip in my shoulder and in pain

[HoraceCope]

had a fall a couple of days ago, onto outstretched arm

yes, i do work, I have a dh and 3 teens, so all able to help - i expect i wont be back to work just yet

Delegate what you can't do make a list and ask who would like to do what.
Don't force yourself to do more as it will delay healing as well as obviously the pain.

thanks, its the clothes washing, they seem to be just expecting i can do,

Well you can't. Say "i cannot do the washing. You will have to do it or you will have no clean clothes. At xxtime I will tell you how to do it". DH probably easiest target, but you know your family. Oh, and if you have dd and ds make sure dd doesn't end up doing it.

ds not here most of the time and yesterday he was here but let me down badly

I think you need to do less than you're doing to help yourself heal, and also to make it clear that they need to step up. You've got a houseful of people who should all be able to get dinner sorted, make you drinks etc. Point out that you have looked after them all when they've been ill or hurt and now it is your turn.

Have you spoken to DS about yesterday, or has your DH?

the dds have school work as an excuse and i wont see ds today, he did not come home last night and works this pm, but i will text him to come home and shape up,
am cross about the clothes washing malarky, will put them in machine but cannot will not hang them up, see how many of them trip over the basket

Time to stand your ground. DH can do your washing, the teens can do their own. They need to learn anyway, now's a perfect time. Don't be a martyr, just tell them you can't do it therefore won't be doing it.

How about cooking and cleaning? When I had a big op last year we bought decent ready meals, DS did the hoovering and some washing, DH sorted food and bins. The washing was the thing I needed most help with as I couldn't lift.

Soll is not an excuse for not helping with the washing. It takes 5 mins to put it on, 15 mins to hang. As it's not a pissing contest I won't tell you about the girl I'm mentoring who has been looking after her family as well as achieving good grades because her mother has been ill for years.

You deserve much better OP, as TQ says, remind them what you do for them when they are feeling ill. And have some and a to strengthen your resolve before you go and kick some arse.

Just don't do it.

Seriously.

No one will die through not having clean clothes.

And other stuff. You tell them: 'I need help. I do a lot of things for you to make your lives comfortable. If you can't be bothered to help me now, when I need it, I will damn well make sure that when I get out of this sling your lives will be a lot less comfortable. There are no clean clothes for you this week. If you want that to be the case every week from now on, just you walk out and leave me to it. I'll be fine, and I'll have clean clothes in the future - you will not. And maybe no dinner or clean sheets either.'

But I am not particularly nice to people who take but won't give back, unless they are under 12.

thanks,
time to put my foot down, and indeed teach them how to use washing machine, and to cook etc.,

Don't do it. If they won't help,I would take each pile and dump their dirty clothing back on their beds.

Ping yourself a ready meal. They will learn how to cook quickly