Please help, please don't laugh

[alwaysawake]

Its really stupid but I've had a phobia of dentists ever since I was little and it's got progressively worse, especially in the last couple of years when I've had a really bad NHS dentist. Last Xmas one of my back teeth broke, leaving only about half the tooth and I had an emergency filling and the NHS dentist was so bad in the appoinments after that I went to a new dentist to register in April. They said they'd have to extract what was left of the tooth which was fine but I was so freaked out about dentists that I couldn't bring myself to make the next appointment and have stupidly let it drag on until now.

Now my tooth's started really killing me, woke me up today and its pathetic and childish but now I'm sitting here nearly in tears because they pains terrible but I can't imagine going to the dentist. I want sedation and then I could manage the treatment but surely no-one's going to do sedation as an emergency treatment?

Please help, has anyone been in this situation? What can I do, I can't have my tooth messed around with while I'm still conscious, I'll freak out and I can't take this pain.

Poor you, it sounds awful.

Haven't been in your situation, but have you chatted to the dentist? They must be used to this - loads of people have a phobia about dentist appointments. I'm sure they have a plan for people who are nervous.

Good luck [smile}

oops, I meant

When I went to the new dentist I told him that I had a phobia and he didn't seem very impressed. He told me off about the state of my teeth (as I never go to the dentist unless I'm in pain), which yes I deserve but it doesn't make me feel any more confident!!! Dreading what he'll say this time, after I've left it 6 months and again am only going back because I'm in pain.

He said I could have the sedation no problem but that also freaked me out (I've got a general fear of anything medical, was in labour for 9 hours before I'd even try gas & air), that's why I didn't go back. But now the pain's really bad I'd be happy to have sedation, as long as I can have it quick

Feel really embarrassed at the thought of having to explain why I've left it so long and then beg for an appointment. They might even say I can't be registered any more then I'm screwed

My best friend is a dentist and she has a few patients who have a similar phobia and I know they are anaethetised in hospital ( as opposed to in her surgery) for their dental work. So don't think you are alone and it will be taken seriously as any other medical condition. I feel so sorry for you but I am sure you will be taken seriously.
Good luck and I am just sorry my friend practices in Melbourne! Tilba xx

We cross posted! I think you have absolutely the wrong dentist for you! I don't understand the English system re being registered. We can go to see any one we like... as long as we pay their bill of course. Have you got some good pain relief??

Thanks for the reply anyway tilba, and welliemum. There just seems to be too much to think about, therefore worry about - ie, do i get sedation, will that make me woozy for days, do i have it without, will that leave me screaming in the dentist. Argh, just wish i knew what it would be like. Thanks for the reassurance though.

I need someone who takes NHS patients because I can't afford to pay upwards of £100 so that leaves me in the registration problem. I'm taking paracetamol atm which is keeping it bearable, will nip out for ibroprofen when the shops open.

You need to find a dentist who is symphatic and understanding. You will get no where with any other type.

I would suggest that you have sedation, this will make you sufficiently comfortable. If you are screaming then noting will get done and the dentist will rebook, therefore more time/effort/money.

What worries you about sedation?

You will onbly be woozy for that day, no longer. Sedation is dispersed quickly by the body.

Give me some more info...what are you woried about?
What happened to make you hate the dentist?

What's the pain like? Throbbing, always there? Sensative to hot/cold?

What piankiller are you taking?

Are they working?

Thanks hauntedsandcastle, will give you as much infor as I can.

I'm worried about sedation because of the warning leaflet they give you, don't lie on your back (how do I know when I'm asleep), small risk of stopping breathing (don't really want to die, at least not because of a tooth extraction), I'm very congested at the moment so won't that make it even worse? Plus what if the sedation doesn't work properly and I know what's going on all the way through?

I'm worried about the extraction, if I'm fully conscious it'll freak me out just having someone pulling a tooth out. If I'm sedated will I come round to blood pouring out? (You can tell by now the sort of irrational panic that goes through my head!)

I'm only worried about the pain, dentists in themselves don't frighten me in the slightest, its just the prospect of pain. I've had quite a few experiences where I've been having work done and got sudden sharp pain despite having the pain killing injections, and they've needed to be topped up and thats left me convinced that no matter how much numbing they do I could still have horrible pain at any minute which is the thing that scares me witless. I've heard numerous people say they didn't feel anything from an extraction but the possibility is still there and thats enough.

I've had sympathetic dentists but a couple of appts down the line they've always seemed to forget and not tell me what they were doing, or do something that freaked me out and I was left more scared than before. The last one I had did a root canal filling that somehow had green smoke coming out of my mouth. I don't know if thats normal or not, I was too freaked to ask!! But I physically couldn't go back there after that.

The pain is always there but worse when I bite and I'm taking paracetamol which is easing it enough to cope with.

Sorry to ramble!!!

Right, you know you can take paracetamol every 4 hours, so 2 hours after that take nurofen. That way you have a constant flow of painkillers in you. Not ideal long term, but will help you get thru this. Try clove oil. Put a little on a cotton bud and put it on the tooth. If you feel you need.

The smoke was normal, ok. What happens is we put a soft plastic material called gutta perca in the root canals when we remove the nerve, as we can't leave it empty. The easiest way to smooth it & remove the excess is to use a hot instrument to melt it off.

Once you have had sedation you should have a responcible adult with you for the rest of the day. The back thing i think is to stop your tounge blocking your airway. I have never given this advise, ans if you think about it, whe you are in recovery you are on your back. But anyway, that would only be (I would think) for that day

You will not have blood pouring out. There will be blood, and it will look like alot, but iy mixes with saliva which gives it extra volume. If you bleed you can roll up a hankie & bite down on it. Pressure will stop the flow. But if it's straight forward, bleeding shouldn't be a problem.

If you are sedated & properly numb, then you shouldn't feel anything. If you do the dentist should top up the local. If you are numb, then you should only feel the sensation of something being done, which hopefully if you sre sedated wouldn't bother you!

fear of the dentist is common. Most of the patients I saw who were nervous firefighters, policemen etc. And a dentist I used to work with was petrified of seeing a dentist! I had a patient who was terrified of injections and insisted we pull a tooth without it! We did, wasn't nice tho! It isn't only you. It's hard, I know but explain to the dentist how you feel, even if you have to do it at every visit, they are human and do forget (although that's no excuse, all patients should be treated at potentially nervous, and a note should be put on your records)

If you always have pain present, then (obvious I know) it wil only get worse. The fact that the paracetamol is helping mean there is hope. Maybe all you will need is a filling, which will be alot easier.

Keep it as clean as possible & let me know if you need anymore help.

Thanks, relieved to hear the green smoke is normal but very surprised the dentist didn't explain it as she knew how panicky I was! Thanks for the advice, so funny that a dentist was scared of having anything done

I haven't got any ibruprofen at the moment but going to buy some today and take in between paracetamol. The dentist last time said he was extracting it because he didn't think a filling would last and I'd need to keep having work done so maybe the best option.

Do you know what they'd be likely to do in an emergency appointment? Would they extract the tooth then and there or do something temporary and make me come back?

Ok, so an extraction it is. DI wouldn't have though they would sedate you and take it out on the emerg appt. I take it that it is an emergency appt and not a pre booked one?

They may give antibiotics, painkillers and rebook you. If yo think you could have it done without any sedation, they may take it out.

Unfortunately, dentists don't always explain, and they should. But saying that, that's what we are for, the nurse should have known you were nervous and pointed it out (I made it my job to make sure any dentist I worked with knew if any patient was nervous)

Can you take somebody with you who could sit in with you? Another thing with nervous patients is that you don't always take in what's being said (no offence) as you just wnat to get out of there asap!

Yep, I'll be phoning up at 8 for an emergency one, I don't have one booked. I could get someone to come with me for the sedation but its hard to always get someone for the routine appointments but I try if I can which does help a little bit but I'm just one of these people who only relaxes if someone's constantly explaining everything every minute, which I appreciate is hard when you're a busy dentist but would still be nice! I will explain to them every visit now until they get bored and help me out

I've thought about having it without sedation but the idea of possible pain gets me, and the memory of one of my mum's extractions where the dentist literally had to kneel on the arm of the chair and yank it out. Granted that was at least 10 years ago but I've got the idea in my head and as its the very back bottom molar and broken so there's only half left I've got visions of it being terrible to get out.

The very fact that you have seen it happen doesn't help! One reason we suggest that children don't attend treatment appt's with their parents!

The dentist isn't too busy to explain it to you, just can't be bothered!

Let me know how it goes

Yep, too true, I definitely won't be taking dd into any of my appts! I'll let you know what happens, thankyou so much for all the help, its been a godsend.

You're welcome, glad to have helped

Good luck

hi aa, just wanted to say I also had/have a phobia of dentists. when I was a child I had a vile dentist who several times didn't believe when I said the anaesthetic hadn't workedyet & started drilling. so went to years and years w/o seeing a dentist. 9 days before ds was born one of my teeth crmbled completely and so I forced myself to go. my dentist is not lovely, she is actually very rude (only local nhs dentist) but by this time I was in pain so forced myself to go.

Ack. this is not making it seem a whole lot better. ok, my point is, it got way better as the appointments progressed (I had a lot of work).

DH was like this - from being quite young, could easily manage to faint 3 times while lying down, during one appointment. In the end he was prescribed Diazepam to take prior to his appointments, which combined with using a walkman to cut out the noises helped him get through it all.
Ironically, since having to go through surgery and chemotherapy, the dentist doesn't seem so much of a issue for him now, though wouldn't suggest that as a therapy for you!!!

Dh hates the dentist too (he's the strapping firefighter Haunted mentions)

But he now has a really sympathetic chap who is brill - he does remind them everytime he goes though that he is nervous and doesn't do pain well. He's recently had some root canal work done and was fine. The key is getting a dentist you like and who is understanding.

Dd recently had two extractions (adult teeth) and I sat with her whilst she had them done - like you she was worried about the pain and the blood. She was fine, there was some blood but not a huge amount and it took much less time then I expected (having never had a tooth out except under GA I didn't know what to expect).

I hope you've managed to get some help today alwaysawake. Toothache is horrible.

In the longer term what about hypnotherapy to help with your phobia and to teach you some relaxation techniques.

FillyjonkthePumpkinEater - when I was a child the dentist didn't even do anaesthetic and just drilled anyway - at least yours tried! It didn't help that we had a dentist who was later discovered to be carrying out unneccesary work (i.e. extra fillings) to boost his income, so you could never go there without having something done. No surprise that I hated going to the dentists then.

On top of that, when I was a student and living away they sent a bill one day for a missed appointment (middle of the day, middle of the week, in termtime) which I definatley hadn't made. Unfortunately they also made another appointment to replace it a week later - but by the time they'd got round to posting it to my parents a day later and 2nd class, they'd got round to posting it on, the uni internal post had got round to delivering it, and I'd finally got it that date had gone too. Double the fine this time Then they did it again and doubled it again, despite me phoning them when I eventually received the first one (didn't tell me then that they'd made another appointment I didn't know about, just waited for it to arrive, too late, by post). By this time the fine was more than I had to live on for a term.

I never did pay because I'd never made any of the appointments, and couldn't afford to anyway. They then struck me from their list and told me that no other dentist would ever take me on. I'm not really sure if that was true then, and even if it was may well not be now that NHS dentistry hardly exists any more. I know now that I really should go, but really don't know what reaction I'll get if I do, given the circumstances.

saggarmakersbottomknocker, it's always the one you least expect!

Odd thing is he's not too keen on heights either Haunted

Hope you're sorted by now always.

Thanks for all the messages, I summoned up some courage (just to phone!!!) and phoned the dentist, luckily I was still registered and they've booked me in for the extraction on Wednesday! As they're a private practice, taken me on as one of their few NHS pity patients, they don't do emergency appts for NHS but the ibroprofen is working a treat and I can go to the real emergency one over the weekend. Not looking forward to weds but I'm having sedation so hopefully will be ok I'll change my tune on Tuesday and be panicking.

Thanks for all the help, especially early this morning when I was trying to decide if the pain was really worse than facing up to the dentist!!

AA, if it's any help to you i had two back teeth removed under sedation last year, one was very broken because i had left it sooooo long due to dentist phobia.
Anyway the sedation was fine, felt no pain just abit of pressure, really was quite out of it, came around when they finished, wobbled out to dh who drove me home. Lay on sofa for the rest of the day. Next day felt fine except for jaw ache but sedation had no after effects.
Hope that helps a little, Good luck.

Thanks tunise, need as much reassurance as I can get How did you feel by the evening, I've got mine early in the morning and hoping to be 'normal' by the evening to put dd to bed, go to sleep without worrying etc etc