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Original poster

vaginal pain really serious can't find help anywhere!!

27 replies

scared1997 · 27/09/2014 22:21

Before we start, I am not a mother, I have only just turned 17 and can't speak to my own mother.
I'm too scared to see a doctor but when I've mentioned this briefly to my doctor during.other things they are clueless. I am depressed because of it and in constant pain. Here's my story;
A year ago my boyfriend at the time fingered me and I was in unbearable pain and also bled. This wasn't him 'popping my cherry' or anything. I left it hoping it would get better- my period came 2 months late after that. I had sex once with protection and the pain was too much. The right side of my vagina wall feels a bruised kind of pain when touched which makes contact painful. Months later, with no sexual contact my vagina entrance swelled up and the whole entrance isn't visible kind of looks like cabbage leaves. This died down a but but still looks like I don't have a vagina entrance. I've missed my period for about 6 months (it'd been a year sinse I had sex so can't be pregnant) a month ago I had sex for about 5 seconds at a party drunk and took emergency contraceptive which started my period for 4 days.Oh yeah I contracted genital herpes from the tw*t. It's been 1 month 2 weeks and I haven't had my period again yet. Doctors won't look inside me. I also now got a yeast infection because of antibiotics I was taking for tonsillitis. It is just too much and I'm becoming depressed. I've only just turned 17 and my life is ruined I'm in constant pain and scared I'll never find love because of herpes and also scared I've become infertile. My doctor says she can't look inside my vagina but my sexual health clinic won't either and GUM doesn't know.

I think a pelvic exam would be best but I don't know who to go to- i haven't mentioned this is incredibly difficult for me because of my age and also because I have bad social anxiety, but I can't tell my mother this either. I've cried myself to sleep for the last few months every night, if anybody could help me or give me advice or had anything similar please please help me

OP posts:
LoveBeingAwakeInTheNight · 27/09/2014 22:27

You poor thing, have you been to the sexual health clinic? Think they would be best. They are fab

sunnyrosegarden · 27/09/2014 22:28

You poor thing. Why on earth won't the doctor look? Maybe a clinic would be better?

EBearhug · 27/09/2014 22:32

Why won't the doctor or the sexual health clinic look? Is it possible to go to another GP?

gamerchick · 27/09/2014 22:33

I don't understand why nobody will look. I've had my gp look at various things down there on more than one occasion.

Go to your STI clinic on the days they are on. They are there for your sexual health, not just to see if you have an STI. You need a full screen and check up. They take swabs and have a look at the area.

I go every couple of years for a check up. Like going to the dentist.

Shakey1500 · 27/09/2014 22:33

Have a virtual hug (())

I'd revisit the GP and absolutely spell it out to them how you are feeling about this and if they won't examine you, insist on being referred to somewhere that will. Try and summon as much assertiveness as you can.

Can I also reassure you- a very good friend of mine contracted herpes when she was slightly older than you. She is now 30, getting married next year and has given birth to a gorgeous, scrummy perfectly healthy baby boy.

Original poster
scared1997 · 27/09/2014 22:48

The sexual health clinic have said it's not run by medically qualified staff so they can't give me individual medical advice :(

OP posts:
Original poster
scared1997 · 27/09/2014 22:49

The sexual health clinic have said it's not run by medically qualified staff so they can't give me individual medical advice :(

OP posts:
gamerchick · 27/09/2014 22:50

You've been for a full screen?

usualsuspect333 · 27/09/2014 22:52

I'm not quite sure why your GP won't take a look.

sunnyrosegarden · 27/09/2014 22:53

Have you actually asked your gp to look and they have refused? If so, you need to change doctor.

gamerchick · 27/09/2014 22:56

Remember OP we were all 17 once. We've been there.

LoveBeingAwakeInTheNight · 28/09/2014 05:37

Walk in centre?

Ask your gp for a redder to a gynecologist and complain to the practice manager if they refuse.

sykadelic · 28/09/2014 06:40

You'll definitely want to get checked out because it sounds like this all should be relatively easily treated.

Genital herpes is able to be controlled with medication. You're able to have sex and have children without passing it on as long as you aren't having a flare up. I believe you'll just take medication but you should always use protection until you're with someone you're comfortable telling about the condition.

The yeast infection (thrush) I get from taking amoxicillin so I was told by the doctor who prescribed it to tell future doctors I was sensitive to it (and what my reaction is) so it doesn't get prescribed.

As others have said, we're all young once. This is just a hiccup. I know if feels bad right now but you CAN get help.

Is there anyone in your life that can help by taking you to a doctor and being that voice for you if you don't feel comfortable doing it yourself?

joanofarchitrave · 28/09/2014 06:49

It can help to write down what you need to say before you go to the doctor. I know it feels like hell on earth to have to say it but you are going through hell anyway with all these worries and no-one to advise you.

This link is to the Brook website for sexual health and advice for young people. They have some drop-in centres, maybe there is one near you? I do think that would be best of all, you need to see someone face to face. Do you perhaps have any relatives, aunts or friends who live near a centre that you could stay with? Say that you want to look at a university or go to a show or something?

If there is no centre near you, then a GUM clinic really would be best, they have seen EVERYTHING and should be kind to you.

bonzo77 · 28/09/2014 06:51

Are you in the uk or elsewhere?

headlesslambrini · 28/09/2014 06:58

Have you had a smear test? If not ask for one. If there are any issues they they should refer you to a gynea.

StrawberryMojito · 28/09/2014 06:59

If you really can't talk to your mum, is there an aunt, cousin or friend you could confide in. I think you could do with some support when you go to the doctor, someone to argue your case and find out exactly what their objection is to examining you because it doesn't sound right to me. Could it be because you are under 18 and unaccompanied? Although they could easily have a nurse in the room.
Revisit your GP or consider changing.

EmNetta · 28/09/2014 13:12

Lots of good advice here, and all I can think of for GP refusing exam is because of your age, and that perhaps GP believes DM should be involved. I'd find another one, and/or use a specialist centre as soon as you can- you've suffered for quite long enough.

Original poster
scared1997 · 28/09/2014 14:54

Thankyou all so much for your advice you've all been lovely :) I told my mum last night, she was really angry and called me horrible names and said Noone will ever love you because herpes but I've decided to ignore this. My mum said she'll take me somewhere soon when I'm better from tonsillitis, brook is the place that refused to look, I live in the UK, thankyou everyone :)

OP posts:
pillowMaxFlower · 28/09/2014 14:57

I think you need a new GP. This sounds very odd.

missnevermind · 28/09/2014 15:16

My doctors run what they call a CASH clinic. Contraceptive and Sexual Health.
It is a huge practice and they will also see people that are not registered there.
I have popped in for a chat and a 'rummage' without having to book appointments in advance. Do you have anything similar in your area ?

sykadelic · 28/09/2014 17:55

scared It's good that you've spoken to your mum. I'm sorry she reacted badly but it's likely she doesn't know much about genital herpes/STI's and is worried for you and didn't know how to express it. Even mums aren't perfect sometimes.

There are people that will judge you, but then people judge for all sorts of stupid reasons (long hair, short hair, tall, short, skinny, fat), so all it shows you is who sucks and who doesn't :)

Please let us know once you've been to the doc and been treated correctly.

Thinking positive for you!

EBearhug · 04/10/2014 12:58

scared, I hope you're doing okay and you've seen a doctor now.

TongueBiter · 04/10/2014 13:08

Could you ask if there is a nurse who deals with sexual health at your clinic? Hope you get it sorted - I have a daughter your age and would hate to think she was dealing with this alone.

maddy68 · 05/10/2014 21:59

Our local hospital has a drop in clinic. They do through examinations and they are lovely. Herpes is only the same as having a cold sore. It's really nothing to worry about. Just avoid sex when you have an outbreak. (The same as you wouldn't kiss someone with a cold sore) when you first contract it you may. Get frequent outbreaks, once you have had it for a while you. Can go years without one. It really isn't anything to stress about, many people have it (it's the last taboo I think) if you get a bad outbreak you can get. Anti vitals to take. You can also take them as a preventative measure and it stops attacks happening at all.