What is it ok to do when you are 'signed off' sick from work?

[Perplexing]

I am worried to leave the house. I have been signed off for a few weeks with depression & anxiety.

I would love a bubble bath with a lush bubble bar for example, but town is 20 minute drive away, and I feel guilty that if anyone saw me shopping, they would think if I am well enough to shop and drive etc I am well enough to work.

I realise thinking this way is probably part of my problem, but am still really worried and would like to know what other 'normal' peoples' perspectives are. TIA.

I always feel a bit like that, even for more minor conditions like a cold or something.

However, ill or not, you have to eat, so I think a visit to the supermarket is allowable. Just don't be caught out having a fun day at Alton Towers.

Pretty much anything is fine, other than doing another job. Go into town.

Thanks. Yep I gave to buy food, although admittedly have not felt up to doing it and cupboards are bare. Just suddenly really felt like luxurious soak with a lush bar...

Actually for stress/anxiety/depression the advice is to get out and about, socialise etc

So pretty much anything really

There is a world of difference between being fit to work and fit to go to the shops

The kitch, nearest town is 5 mins away but doesn't have a lush. Bigger town 20 mins away and does have lush. Is bypassing closer town (and inferior bath products IMHO) ok d' you think?

I just feel so guilty people in North Korea etc will be half dead and still being forced to work. What right do I have to be off work 'sick' and doing something nice (ie buying lush bath product)?

You can do whatever- honestly its fine I was signed off with stress and went into town a few times

Go and get your lush bar.

I've recently been signed off for depression. The GP told me to forget about work and enjoy life with my kids. Take then on days out, go for walks, get my hair cut while they're in nursery, poorly round the shops.

If you are depressed, you need to increase the number of nice times in your life. That might be sitting by a river enjoying the sun, it might be finally sorting out the spare room and getting rid of the junk, it might be a bubble bath. It almost certainly won't be sitting at home worrying about being seen out.

If anyone from work sees you and says anything, hold your head high. Don't give excuses and don't tell colleagues about the reason for absence if you don't want to. A breezy "I really hope to be back soon, but there are a few ongoing issues" should suffice, and if they "report" you to your manager then be ready to explain to him/her that your GP gave you time off to heal yourself and get back to normal. There's nothing normal about hiding indoors so your colleagues don't see you.

Good luck with the depression - and get out in the sunshine!

Better to go out and buy a lush bath product than to spend time neither working nor doing anything that might make you feel less depressed and anxious...

I don't think staying in a house without food in the cupboards, worrying about North Korea is a great cure for anxiety and depression. You'll be off work forever if you think you have to stay off work until you stop feeling anxious and depressed, but don't dare feel anything but anxious and depressed because if you didn't feel like that, you'd think you were malingering...

Rabbit stew, now you put it like that I can see you talk sense... But you have summed up exactly how I feel. Oh well, it's day 1 of medication which I will be on for at least 6 months as this us my 3rd bout of depression.

Hopefully things will improve. Just so hard at the moment, as can't see an end to it.

What right do I have to be off work 'sick' and doing something nice (ie buying lush bath product)?

That is the depression talking, I promise. Please go to Lush this afternoon, and sit on a park bench for 20 mins while you're out.

If you turn your Korea statement around .....

You have a home, a job, and the luxury of paid time off to recover from depression. What right do you have to sit inside and hinder your recovery when you've been given this chance to recover?

Please pick up the nice bits of your life and make a real effort to do them more often while you're off work. It will help your recovery and get you back to work faster.

Good luck, and enjoy your bath

I was signed off sick with depression for two months. I went out of the country several times as my now husband was working abroad, and I went to stay with him. I think you're okay going pretty much wherever you like.

As I said, other than taking up other paid work, pretty much anything is okay.

But but but... I have been explaining to people I can't face seeing them, which is perfectly true as I just can't face talking to people (well meaning friends etc) as I feel scared of them, well not them exactly, but what they will think of me as I feel so weird. I can sort of cope with seeing strangers as they don't know me.

But people will think its odd if I am ok to shop bug not ok to see them, won't they? And Sod's law dictates I WILL see so done I know on the way to / from Lush.

Difficult isn't it? I was once seen by a manager from work and a comment was made about was I better then. Luckily the pharmacist chose that moment to come out with my prescription!!

Yes starfish very difficult. Especially when your problem is anxiety and guilt to start with! Major catch 22 situation.

It's totally ok to go out of the house and do things, it will help you to be up and about and doing things. Staying in the house would make you worse rather than better.

Being able to shop and drive doesn't mean you're fine to be at work, and it's just your anxiety making you worry what people will think.

I assume your manager knows that you are off with anxiety/depression, rather than flu or a bad back or whatever? In which case he/she would understand if anyone decided to poke their nose in and say "I saw her in the shops".

I manage staff. If one of them was off with similar, I'd be glad to hear they were managing to get out and do things, and hope they were starting to feel a bit better. I certainly wouldn't be cross with them.

Starfish, glad the pharmacist appeared and saved the day for you!

A mum- thank you. I still feel really reluctant to go out. Yes manager does know nature of problem but unsure they would be too impressed if I was spotted in Lush.

I think I will ask GP or counsellor for advice, if they say it's ok I can always say I was following advice which would allow me to do it. I will have to wait until next week. I could go for a walk today somewhere in the country. Just feel really bad about buying 'unnecessary' items.

It depends what you are signed off for e.g if you are signed off for leg pain you can't go jogging /dancing. In your case I'm sure nobody expects you to quarantine yourself at home. There is a MASSIVE difference between feeling well enough in yourself to get some bubble bath and feeling well enough to take on all the stress/pressure of a work environment.

Go get your smellies and enjoy your bath. If anyone asks its therapy .
At nearby Lush shop. My nearest one is 1 hour on the train + 1 mile walk to the station.

Oh perplexing, this is your illness talking.

A special bath sounds like such a perfect treatment for your current situation.

I struggle with anxiety too, and have been seeing a counsellor. A couple of sessions back she got me to commit to buy a special bath thing and have a bath with it. So it is officially therapeutic.

Taking time to nurture yourself and your wellbeing is as important as taking your medication in order to get well. It's a bit like keeping up your fluid intake when you have flu. You need to keep up your good experiences intake.

I know that I was frightened of bumping into people I knew at some of my lowest points. I found it helped to have a pre-prepared phrase in my head that I would say to be polite but get me out of there asap.

Now, do you think you could be a bit brave/daring and make it to Lush today?

How can we help?

Istme, thank you...

What sort of phrase did you use to 'get you out of there'? I, especially worried about people I don't know that well, mums at school etc, saying haven't seen you around, are you ok? I'm not ok but if I say 'no' it leads to lots of follow up questions and if I say 'yes' it's a lie and they will wonder why off work etc..

Aha, the curse of the scrupulously honest.

It sounds like you have a nice group of contacts if they would ask those kinds of caring questions :).

And if they're nice, they will also be fine with pretty much anything you say.

So, today is not the day when you want to have a meaningful exchange with anybody - you are on a mission to get Lush stuff.

How about, "Nice to see you, I'm a bit under the weather at the mo and just need to pick up a few things at the shops. Let's catch up properly when I'm feeling better." For somebody you know quite well.

Or change the last sentence to "See you at school/the office/wherever" for anybody else.

Would something like that be something you could imagine yourself saying?

There are plenty of things you can do when signed off - just not working!

For example, I and a colleague have been signed off work with bad backs, and the doctors' instructions both times were to get out and about and walk as much as possible, not to sit around or lie in bed. I went to London and walked round museums and art galleries. It was a nice way of distracting myself from the pain, and of getting better at the same time.

If you feel that bad about it, do you have to go to Lush? Could you pick up somthing smelly from a local supermarket?