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Original poster

Has anyones Dh/Dp had/considered a vasectomy??

27 replies

cataloguequeen · 28/07/2006 07:10

Good or Bad feelings?
Any regrets?,how did you feel?... I've read all the leaflets would like to hear from some real people about their real experiences/opinions please!!.

Thanks

OP posts:
geekgrrl · 28/07/2006 07:44

my dh had one and we feel very liberated.

Seriously though - it wasn't too bad for him, he was a bit of a wimp about it all afterwards - lots of inspecting of stitches, 'I think I've got an infection!!', that kind of thing. Took maybe 2 weeks to heal completely.

It just feels like a huge relief really, knowing we will definitely not have any more children. It's been 1.5 years and we have no regrets whatsoever.

agalch · 28/07/2006 08:09

Hi cataloguequeen

My 4th was due last Sunday and i am making an appt for dp to see gp next week with a view to having the snip so will watch this thread with great interest.

Friends have said that if i don't want anymore i should have it done instead.I think tho it is a simpler op for a man?

Original poster
cataloguequeen · 28/07/2006 09:07

Yes agalch it's much simpler for a man a 20 min op a local and tight pants for 1 week virtually scar free!

for a woman you have a general, 2 hour op with scars (keyhole if you're lucky!!)more risk of complications etc no comparison imo.

My dh and I decided about 2 years ago our agreement is if anyone gets snipped it's him even though my mil thinks it should be me,not likely love think I've done enough thank you!!

He was supposed to have in done in November last year but he had a freakout!!(quite literally) and refused I just said ok.. but he now has an appointment for next week seems like he really wants to go ahead...I'm going with him for support and sending the kids to grandma for the night so I can give him some tlc and also my dds always seem to aim for that area! so I'm not surprised he wants them out of the way lol

gg your dh sounds just like mine such baby

OP posts:
Feistybird · 28/07/2006 09:10

Just the same a geekgrrl - even down to the inspection of stitches!!

It's been 2 years - I am (imo) too old to have more kids, so the decision was quite easy for us.

Raggydoll · 28/07/2006 09:12

mine had one on tuesday - i can't wait to not have the depo jab - he won't be clear 'till jan though so i have to have 2 more

DumbledoresGirl · 28/07/2006 09:16

Dh has had one. Unfortunately it took along time for him to get the all clear (2 years) but now that he has it, we have no regrets. He has had no side effects and I think it makes sex more enjoyable and spontaneous. I have just had a scare when my period was late, during which I read a lot about the failure rate of vasectomies, but on the whole, I think they are more reliable than other methods.

bubblepop · 28/07/2006 11:28

dh had it done and i was preg again 3 months later.now he's had to have it done AGAIN. apparantly though, it is quite unusual for it not to work. now that we have the all clear we both feel totally relieved, but we were both 100% certain that we did,nt want more children.you've got to be really sure thats what you want..

geekgrrl · 28/07/2006 12:00

can I just share my top embarrassing moment with you? It's vasectomy-related..
As I said, dh was very keen on inspecting his stitches because he was so worried about something going wrong. Anyhow, he's a bit portly and it's obviously not all that easy to inspect the bit between your legs so he got me to take a very close-up picture with the digital camera so that he could reassure himself that his knackers weren't going to drop off.

.... A few months later my parents came to visit. We have no proper TV but a huge screen (12ft across) and a projector which we use for watching films and also, looking at our photographs, particularly when my parents or the in-laws come to visit. By that point in time we'd forgotten all about the 'nads pictures - until they suddenly appeared in all their 12 ft glory in front of dh, me and my parents!!

Original poster
cataloguequeen · 28/07/2006 12:07

Pmsl geekgrrl...what a sight for sore eyes!!!12ft nads priceless

I must take a picture now just for posterity and black mail purposes

OP posts:
monkey · 28/07/2006 12:48

omg. surely much more embarrassing for your dh in front of his in laws!!!!! Will he ever look your mum in the eye again? Os indeed she him? OMG.

beckybrastraps · 28/07/2006 12:51

My dh is just waiting for the word from me! He'd make an appointment this afternoon if I finally said "that's enough". Thing is, even though I REALLY don't want another child, I just can't tell him to go ahead just yet....

Gobbledigook · 28/07/2006 12:52

Dh had one about a year ago and was clear after about 4 months I think. It was a simple op for him, he didn't really make any fuss. He was a bit sore for a couple of days but fine after that.

No regrets at all - we have 3 boys (5, 3 and nearly 2) and are quite sure we don't want any more children.

Knowing there is no chance of getting pregnant is great and I'm a better person in lots of ways for not being on hormonal contraception.

zoeuk1 · 30/07/2006 11:20

my dh had one about 3 yrs ago. no compications, took about 20 minutes and he walked out the hospital (bit like a cowboy!). its great.

Nemo1977 · 30/07/2006 11:24

My dh is going to have one next year after db 3 is here. I am sad about the idea but also know how quickly I get pg so if we had an accident we would be stuffed as we will have 3 under 3.3yrs and would need a new car, bigger house etc if we had more which we just cant do. I think I would go on having kids as I am only 28 but we just cant so vasectomy seemed the bast option to us.

Pollyanna · 30/07/2006 11:32

beckybrastraps I am in the same position as you - dh wants the snip but I can't quite categorically say I don't want any more even though I know I don't really want (and shouldn't) have any more.

crazydazy · 30/07/2006 11:54

My DP had it done too as I get pregnant very easily and he was fine after a couple of days and even then was just a bit sore.

I don't regret it because we had decided that we only wanted 2 children and we got boy and girl so felt our family was complete.

DP makes comments every now and again like "....at least you can still have kids" etc but I tell him that I know that but don't ever want anymore kids.

hulababy · 30/07/2006 12:10

I am interested in how old your DH's were when they had their op, and how they felt about having one.

May have to make some big decisions about contraception in next few months and obviously want to consider all options available.

crazydazy · 30/07/2006 13:02

DP was 33. It was the best thing for us as I was hopeless at taking the pill and I got pregnant when I had the coil fitted and we felt we had completed our family so it was the obvious choice for us.

DumbledoresGirl · 30/07/2006 22:14

Dh was 36 but I don't think age is really the determining factor. We had completed our family (4 children) and both knew we didn't want anymore. I am a bit older than dh and my last pregnancy had had a few problems I didn't experience with the other pregnancies that I felt might be age related, so that was another reason (if it was needed!) to not have more children.

I have to say, once the operation was performed, I did expereince a few slight qualms along the lines of "Now I can't have any more children" and it felt like my menopause had come early, but I think that was just because the idea took time to adjust to. There weren't any real regrets. Dh did not experience those qualms at all. I think he was completely happy with the idea of never being able to change our minds about another child, but then he had only wanted 3 children and had had to have been persuaded by me to have the fourth so I think he was already one child over his comfort zone!

geekgrrl · 31/07/2006 09:00

dh was 33 or 34 when he decided to do it - but as DG said, age isn't the factor. For us, it was knowing that we have 3 children and absolutely do not want any more.
dh was fine about it - his dad had had one too and his family are very open when talking about such things, so I'm sure that helped - to dh it was just the right and manly thing to do for his dw.

Nemo1977 · 31/07/2006 10:01

I am 28 and dh is 29..will be 30 when he has the op.

Tortington · 31/07/2006 10:07

no regrets i dint want any more. he didn't want anymore - i told him i was sick of coils tablets and doctors sticking their hands up my fandooky and I HAD ENOUGH. so declared unless he sorts himself out we woild have millions of children.

appt at doctors next day he fairly ran to the hospital!

hulababy · 31/07/2006 15:59

Thanks all.

Was only concerned about age thing because of the possible what ifs for DH's future should anything happen to me....I know, not likely, but you never know.

DumbledoresGirl · 31/07/2006 17:07

I have known it to be suggested that the woman is sterilized as her fertility is shorter lived than the man's, Hulababy. It is a valid point of course, but has to be weighed up against the fact that female sterilisation is a more complex op than a vasectomy.

hulababy · 31/07/2006 17:07

No, definitely DH's turn to go through something! I have done the pregnancy/having a baby bit

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