To have a 3rd child

[IsItSummerYet]

Need some opinions as I keep going round in circles regarding a third child. I have 2DC's. My health isn't great as I have Crohns Disease which is worse now than it was when I have conceived previously. I also have separated stomach muscles and 3 hernias in my stomach area. This would obviously worsen if I was to have a 3rd pregnancy.

My partner is happy either way although does have concerns regarding my health.

Seeing this written down I surely am being ridiculous wanting a 3rd? I just am increasingly preoccupied with this subject and need to decide either way.

Well firstly, your body has done two amazing things whilst dealing with some serious health problems so well done.

I think if your own health cons outweigh the pros then having a third child wouldn't be fair on the other two. But I also think you have to go with your heart on a decision like this. A friend of mine has similar problems with her stomach and has sadly not been able to carry a child full term which of course would be very distressing for you all.

There is more regret in not having a child than in having one imho.

Not really an opinion either way but it's a complicated choice you have to make, good luck.

Just think of the extra expense, extra worry, larger car, not fitting into two hotel rooms, all the organisation of activities/school run and the logistics of three! Put me off and I am as fit as a fiddle. Be happy with what you have and stay healthy!

I'm expecting #7 in July, so I can hardly advise against a 3rd baby , but as you have health problems it really is not that easy.

If you find it already a challenge to look after your existing children, if your health is likely to deteriorate even more maybe it is best to not have another, sorry.

I totally understand the longing, I really do.
I would have liked even more after this one, but I don't think my body, my emotional and mental health could stretch beyond this one last time.

If I had your health problems I think I would try and listen to my brain telling me what is practical - and let my heart break a little.

I hope this is helpful and I wish you all the best, whatever you decide.

Thank you for your responses. It's very hard head v heart and a lot of what ifs.

I know I should be happy with what I've got but this longing I have to complete my family is almost too much. I should be grateful for what I have and I know there are many many people in far worse sutuations. But I don't feel done and that is something that is hard to get past.

I just wanted to say I understand how you feel. I wanted no4 but also have crohns, a colostomy and a parastomal hernia. My crohns is the worse it's ever been but it's a grieving process for me. I am determined to be happy with what I have. The risk is too great x

Thank you wannabestressfree and I am sorry to hear about your health problems. Crohns has such complex symptoms doesn't it and can be such a nasty illness. I really hope things improve for you.

You too. Feel free to inbox me if you want to chat x