How to help DH to be healthy?

[shebird]

DH smokes, drinks and is over weight. I am terrified that he is going to have a heart attack or get cancer. I have tried talking to him and he agrees that he needs to adopt a healthier lifestyle but it never happens. There have been a few attempts at quitting smoking using patches, Nhs and ecigs. He lasts a few weeks but then he gives up as soon as anything stressful happens. I have nagged and talked and tried everything. I just despair that he does not have any willpower nor does he seem to care about the consequences. Any bright ideas on how to kick start someone to care more about their health before it's too late?

You aren't going to want to hear this, but it's his life and his choice how he lives it and if this conflicts with your value system then you have a whole set of other choices to make.

He will stop smoking, drinking and eating too much when he is ready and only then.

The only area in which you may be able to exercise some control is in what food is in the house and what meals are prepared, but that won't stop him eating crap at work.

Sadly, you cannot make him do anything - he will do it if/when he is ready.

Sorry OP but I agree with Rockin. Your nagging may well be having the opposite effect to the one you want it to.

I'm slightly overweight (BMI 26) and my slim DH sometimes gives me helpful tips re how to lose weight. He honestly tries to be sensitive but the upshot is that I now eat healthily with him and snack in secret. Even though I would love to lose the weight myself!

shebird apart from the smoking! that could have been us a few years ago. I have actually cried out of frustration because I was convinced he was on a path to a heart attack or morbid obesity.

Things have changed though, he still overeats but the thing that has made the difference is that I finally got him to the doctor. The go did some basic tests and it turns out that my DH had low thyroxine. After a wile of being on the tablets he noes goes cycling once or twice a week, takes more of an interest in the DC and copes with stress at work much better.

I also do the usual stuff like buying no or very little crap, keeping the fruit bowl out and full, adding lots of veg to spag Bol, curries etc and if I do a roast his plate is half veg. I am also trying to do veggie meals twice a week.

I agree that it is his life and only he can change things but I just find it so frustrating and I am sad that he doesn't seem to care about the consequences enough to make a change. The odds are stacked against him because of his lifestyle and a family history of heart disease and cancer.
I try not to nag as I know this does not work but how long do I let it go? I just feel like the clock is ticking.

I cook from scratch at home and I do not buy junk food so I think diet wise he is not too bad. The excess weight is down to beer and lack of exercise.