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CFS in teenager, can anyone with experience suggest a routine?

183 replies

overthemill · 16/12/2013 09:46

Dd 14 recently diagnosed with CFS and waiting to see specialist cfs paediatrician out of our area as there is no one in our area. We know from reading that she needs a routine. She is really severely affected at present and is almost bed bound though by using bottom to come down and hands and knees to get up she is managing to come downstairs each day. But what routine should she have? I try to get her up around 10 but it takes about an hour ( more on days when I insist she showers) to get her out of bed and dressed. Most days I have to dress he and clean her teeth. She gets down, eats breakfast and stays on sofa until bed at 8. I try to encourage and stimulate her but it is very hard. Mainly we watch tv and chat a bit. Tbh she doesn't watch tv it's background for her. She can't bear bright lights or noise so lots of day we sit with curtains closed. She can't read or concentrate and a conversation is hard as she forgets words. Last week I got her outside (about 15 steps for me) to see her rabbit. Eating is hard as she struggles with smells and tastes and has to est same plain food every day. No variety at all. She tolerates eating but wouldn't do so unless I basically forced her! When she gets up to go to loo I have to help her up and provide balance for her as she is so dizzy and she faints frequently. I am scared to leave her alone. I get up to her several times in night and during evening when she is in bed.

So, what an earth can I have as a routine? What should she be doing? Today a maths tutor from medical needs team is coming but she expects to come say hello DNS leave. They font think she's well enough for tutoring. After Xmas we are hoping for a physio to assess her and an ot who can suggest ways she can be more independent as she hates me having yo provide intimate care for her.

Any ideas from you people with CFS experience? Am happyish to wait for specialist input but feel I may be making her worse!

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newestbridearound · 04/02/2014 20:50

Ooh Kate do you know Louise? I've sent her a letter for (hopefully!) her book. She's such a sweetheart and it's a great idea.

Over definitely bring it up with the specialist. I think the main way to diagnose POTS is a tilt table test, not pleasant but can give a diagnosis and therefore a better idea of how to work with it.

CFSKate · 11/02/2014 12:05

Hi newestbridearound, no I don't know Louise, but I'm a big fan of the Let's do it for ME fundraising campaign.
The agenda for the conference is up now that's in May, and there's a report from the Bristol meeting here

newestbridearound · 11/02/2014 12:11

Just been reading through the links, very interesting. I agree Let's do it for M.E is great and one of our best hopes in the long term.

Overthemill how is everything going?

overthemill · 13/02/2014 10:56

Sorry for delay, everyone here has been in bed with horrendous cold. Even Rosie who despite cough sneezes and streaming nose says she feels the same as always. Things not great otherwise. Trying to get specialist referral. Struggling. Spoken to psych team who are overseeing her and because of my reports and feedback from home tutoring team they are trying to get advice about an admission because she is do ill. Don't know how I feel except total despair.
DH being much more helpful now he's been at home 3 weeks and sees so much more if her. Feels like we are a team again

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overthemill · 17/02/2014 08:10

Just waiting now for historic first ever home visit by GP who will take blood!
Talking with dietician about possible tube feeding as weight loss speeding up and it's now worrying apparently. Poor dd is trying so hard but energy required to eat along with almost total aversion die to smell taste texture makes it really hard

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newestbridearound · 18/02/2014 16:21

I know quite a few people who are tube fed, whether due to their M.E, eating disorders or conditions like gastroparesis. It seems scary but most of them say that you do get used to it and having the procedure done was fine. What sort of tube are they considering? How does your DD feel about it? I hope seeing the gp went okay, well done on getting a home appointment, they are always so reluctant to do them.

Thinking of you both Thanks

overthemill · 18/02/2014 18:49

GP visit went really well, very kind and thoughtful. Was shocked that since she saw her last (September!) dd no better! Results due Thursday.

But also had today first visit to local paediatrician for Rosie. Exhausting but thorough and so very helpful. He's prescribed 10 mg of amitripyline (?) which is low dose antidepressant for bedtime to help her sleep through the night and reduce her pain. He wants her up by 8.30 in the mornings (rather than 10.30) and is really clear: complete rest if she is tired - she must exert herself! He says this is the body's way of saying it needs rest. He's happy for referral for Bath to go ahead but usually refers to GOSH. He was so calm and soothing and Dd loved him. He will chase yesterday's bloods and will let us know if anything unusual is found. Also saw hospital dietician who was nice but bit fierce about food. Came away with carrier bag full of supplements for Her to try to give her more calories. Don't hold out much hope of her actually consuming them tbh but we'll try! Feel much better now. It was so hard to get Rosie to the hospital but feel pleased that we managed it all by ourselves!

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overthemill · 18/02/2014 18:55

Tube feeding not considered best option at moment. To be considered if this next 4 weeks go badly

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chocaholic73 · 19/02/2014 16:09

Glad it went well and you have professionals on side. Hopefully that will make things easier for you. Think they will only do nasal feeding as a last resort. I presume you have tried Ensure?

overthemill · 19/02/2014 18:45

No what is ensure? A supplement? They're pushing fortuni products which she can't cope with as they are too rich tasting

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chocaholic73 · 19/02/2014 19:51

ensure.com/ - they're a nutritional shake - they're very keen on them round here for people who aren't eating! You can get them on prescription cos they are very expensive.

andthenthereweretwo · 19/02/2014 22:14

Im not sure if this has been suggested before but I would seek an occupational therapy referral as routine, energy conservation and pacing is their area of expertise. I work in adult community mental health team and see people with additionsl depression and anxiety and OT assessment and input is def indicated as ideal treatment in this clinical area. Hope this is helpful.

overthemill · 20/02/2014 10:53

We have visit today from adolescent psych and cpn as our usual one is on holiday and we haven't seen anyone from that team since November. I'm hoping they will be helpful - I know cbt is sometimes suggested for cfs patients but tbh I think we need help as a family coming to terms with huge change to our lives. Dd isn't bored, doesn't notice what month it is and doesn't really care about anything except how ill she feels or how much pain she's in but we are struggling with change - so I am am climbing the walls with boredom as I've been alone for 7 days with her and only entertainment is hospital visit (friends quickly fallen by the wayside and DH away). Also we have to have everything really quiet, little light, etc due to her hypersensitivity and we only have a sitting room so until she goes to bed at 8 everyone sits in the dark silently!!!!

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overthemill · 02/03/2014 15:57

Just a catch up. Still wAiting for referral to come through. She's lost loads more weight. Life is hard!

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newestbridearound · 03/03/2014 18:41

If she's still losing weight can you take her back to the gp? Is she eating much or still struggling? Have been thinking of you both x

overthemill · 04/03/2014 08:52

She sees 3 different dieticians all off whom are scratching their heads not sure what to do. There's going to be a meeting with her new local paed but I'm hoping that the threat of tube feeding which is only next step will speed the specialist referral

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Matildathecat · 04/03/2014 12:03

Sorry, I've nothing to add, as no experience of this (other than SIL with ME, she's much better). I just wanted to offer you support. Your situation sounds unbearable. I hope you are getting some kind of respite and I'm shocked that your friends have fallen by the wayside.

Is there any local support groups that might offer you help or advice? Any way I'm glad your medical team are supportive.

Best wishes.

overthemill · 04/03/2014 18:57

Well we are back in hospital! Just had blood done which took an hour because she is so cold. Results will indicate immediate course of action. Nightmarish as lots of crying poorly babies and so much bright light! Dd sitting curled up completely covered by blankets to blot it all out. Been here since 4. Hope we get home tonight

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chocaholic73 · 05/03/2014 19:31

just saw your message. Hope things were sorted and you are both now home and DD is more comfortable. Can really sympathise with the difficulty in getting blood .. my younger DD has this all the time.

overthemill · 07/03/2014 13:45

Yes back home though on daily decisions about tube feeding or not. V stressful. Also had major movement on referral. Went ballistic when we were refused for incorrect reason so stirred it all up and contacted v senior person in CCG and finally getting help. They are personally contacting hospitals finding out which one can offer first apt and following funding decisions through. Really kind but LNG why such a huge fight!!!!

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HuiledOlive · 07/03/2014 17:16

Oh Overthemill I'm so sorry to hear things are still so dreadful for your poor dd- and you too.

You sound as though you are doing an utterly tremendous job getting her the very best medical care out there. Well done! Its bloody hard and most of us give up. What a great mother.

I don't know anything about feeding tubes I'm afraid so can't offer much help.

In terms of adjusting as a family, I had some counselling which helped me enormously in dealing with catastrophe living as it was termed.

Sending you my best wishes and hope that things begin to turn around for you and yours soon.

overthemill · 07/03/2014 17:45

DH wants therapy for us all as he's worried about how it's changing our dynamics and impact on other dcs. It's v tough but we are trying to work it out with no support at all! Everything is different, nothing is the same. Even down to having to have lights off all the time because she's light sensitive. I can't believe how our life has changed

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HuiledOlive · 07/03/2014 17:57

If you have the money Optimum health Clinic is excellent for nutrition advice.

HuiledOlive · 07/03/2014 18:01

Sorry Overthemill I didn't see your last post before posting.

I think your dh is sensible in wanting some sort of therapy for you all. ME is like a tidal wave over the whole family. Its hard for others to understand just how far reaching and fundamental the effects are on you all. And it sounds even more serious for your family than many. It is really important to look after yourself even in a tiny way. I found counselling helpful and my dh had some too. The dds had support from the school.

overthemill · 07/03/2014 18:36

But great news now because had phone call from hospital cfs specialist team offering home visit next week or week after! It had been our first choice but they were full but now after I called and left tearful message detailing all her problems weight loss etc the lead consultant called himself making an exception. Said bureaucracy had gone mad and he was doing the sensible thing. So so happy

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