Binge Eating - how do I break the cycle...?!

[Looneymum]

I am sure there are already threads on this topic so sorry if I am going over old ground.... here goes! I have basically binged for as long as I can remember (I am 40 next year). During some of my life I have managed to control it, probably because I was at work, although there are always a good few eating hours when getting home. Since having the kids and not working, things have reached a peak. Take today for instance, I have been this morning and done a step class at the gym which works well as the kids (DD1 aged 4 and DD2 aged nearly 2)go to creche. Once back home though as lunchtime approaches, I managed my two salad rolls, the kids leftovers then some chocolate and sweets. DD1 is now at pre-school for a couple of hours whilst DD2 has a nap. I have already spotted the chocolate icecreams in the fridge and know there are some spicy crisps just crying out to be eaten. So here I am, hoping that someone can tell me what this is all about. Why do I feel so desperate to eat until I feel like I am going to burst, only then waiting until that feeling goes so that I can eat some more...? Any thoughts... please help.. Oh, by the way, I am about three stones over weight.

danceswithmonkeys, I too get excited about the opportunity to eat freely ie. hols etc. It just seems so sad to get excited about food and not much else, it truly rules my life. We are off on holiday in August and I vowed I would lose weight before going (but in the event have put on about a stone). Once on hols I will feel like I need a treat for being on holiday - bizarre of what?!

Have you looked at the Eating Disorders Association website? That's a good place to look for advice/recommendations about help. To find a properly qualified counsellor or psychotherapist visit the BACP or UKCP websites. Unfortunately the therapists who work at the link I posted earlier aren't based in your area. Remember it's not about food. Yes, if you starve yourself or avoid certain foods that you feel are 'triggers' (I don't think they really are: in fact it's the difficult feelings that come first, and to avoid those difficult feelings you then reach for a comfort food to cover it up) then you might feel better in the short term, and a sensible diet (like Slimming World) will help you to feel more in control of your weight. But it won't solve any underlying issue. Although lots and lots of people will try and take money from you and say that their miracle diet/food/supplement/medicine will solve your weight problem forever. When people say therapy's expensive they forget about all the money they've spent feeding their food addiction and avoiding their feelings.
I'll shut up now! Hope you get the help you need.

Hi - I was feeling all mental - as well as being busy so avoided this thread and have been thinking. I am really glad to see other people have joined in - not my thread but thank you all for posting. I have decided I will get some help - start at the Gp, be honest and see what he says. I am not really overweight - on sane day I know that - but do clearly have a problem.

Arabica, thanks for pointing me in the right direction. I have found a counsellor that doesn't live too far away. Unfortunately when I rang earlier I got her answermachine - I hung up! The kids are now fed and running amock so I think I may try again and see what she thinks!

Apronstrings - I hope you have good luck with your GP. I was really disappointed with mine, you would think they would see someone is distressed and point them in the right direction.

Thanks for all your support - please keep posting with all your pearls of wisdom!

Apronstrings, why not try talking to the Eating Disorders Assn first about what kind of help you might expect your GP to proivide. I did this and they suggested writing a letter to the GP to hand in before my appt. It said what I felt the problem was and named the hospital I felt I wanted to be referred to for help. This was back in the 1980s before bulimia was as well known as it is today. However it is still a useful strategy when there's doubt about how seriously you might be taken.

Well I have made some progress on the counsellor front. I have booked an appointment to see her on Wednesday so I am hopeful. The slight downside is that she is going away for a couple of months and then she only works 9-5pm which will give me some childcare issues but where there is a will....!

glad your getting somewhere l/mum ...you are def not alone

i think the cards/invites project is a really good idea and you dont sound the slightest bit thick btw.

oh!..and start thinking of another name for when your self esteem picks up

I am currently stuggling with this myself (am now 41 and have been binge eating since I can remember) It is definitley worse when I am depressed and when I was a SAHM for a year months - after the 'can't be bothered to eat I'm so tired stage' I put on 4 stone in 6 months. I have lost this now with a strict diet (find it a lot easier now I am back at work PT) but I know the real battle begins now - the struggle with eating normally (whatever that means) and putting food into it's proper place in my life.

I have decided to try overeaters anonymous - I did go for a while a few years ago and found it difficult but amazingly supportive and helpful. Don't know if this would help but it is free - counsellers (usually) cost money.