Tamoxifen bus shelter -42

[Gigondas]

Dragging trolley onto new thread.

That's a bugger about the nodes really, and it is horrid news to deal with especially when you weren't really expecting it (I had exactly the same thing happen to me - and like you I burst into tears - and it took a few days to get myself together again).

It's a good idea to keep yourself occupied and do practical stuff while you wait for your surgery, - PJ shopping v.sensible! Make sure you try to get some rest and relaxation and plan a few nice things to distract yourself.

It's great that your bosses are being supportive, - is your BCN a nice approachable type? - mine rung me every other day when I was waiting for surgery - and it kept me going, or are there any cancer support centres near you - I've always found them very good for a supportive chat if you need it And of course we are all here and rooting for you too xx

Thanks for the positive replies.

Yes Kurri my BCN is lovely and very approachable. Sadly she was on holiday today! In fact she has been away for both times that I have had results! I did tell her that if she didn't like me, she only had to say She'll be back next week and I will try and arrange to go in for a chat. Maybe a bit more detailed chat. Funny how after your appointment people ask you questions, and you suddenly realise that you didn't think to ask the doctor that?! I suppose at the time you're just letting the initial shock sink in!

I do have a very good cancer centre near me. I will try and go tomorrow afternoon, to say hi, and see what help and support they can offer.

Xx

Sorry you didn't get the news you wanted really and like the others say it does take a while to get used to.
Are you going to be having chemo after the Op - I think you originally said it wasn't on the cards but I'm guessing that may have changed now?
You also said you are having scans - is that a CT scan? Between us on this board I think we have had every possible scan at some point so if you have any questions do ask.

Retail therapy is def the best thing to do - come back and tell us if you found any nice PJs. (My onc office is by some very nice shops and I feel obliged to have a little shop every time I go there - particularly as I get free parking at oncs so it would be rude not to take advantage.)

oh poo really that's a pain but fingers really crossed that it's nowhere else - think the nodes hold it up on it's travels anyway - retail therapy definitely a v good idea.
Wine also xxx

really sorry you got such rubbish news, but it's lovely your bosses are so supportive. Bowel cancer is a bit different but mine was in two nodes. Someone on here described them as the dustbins of the body as they collect all the rubbish, so they catch the cells before they head elsewhere. Still pretty scary to know it was on the move though, I know, but they will give you whatever treatments are necessary and it will more than likely all be okay :)

I'm home now. Procedure was cancelled. I don't mind that at all, just hated being there waiting, I ended up crying for most of the wait they've changed the admissions lounge as it used to have a waiting area where you could sit with your relative until the time of the op, just going into a bay to do the paperwork and obs etc. but they've changed it now so my dad wasn't allowed to wait with me and everyone just sits in individual bays for the whole time. I took a puzzle book but it didn't distract me enough and I just kept thinking about my other surgeries and how I'll never be normal and I got really upset :( that's not like me at all so hopefully I will soon shake it off. Thank you all for your good wishes :)

Oh bugger Really , I'm sorry to hear that . So glad you have such supportive bosses , makes such a difference not having to worry about that side of things .
I've had CT , MRI , and bone scans . So any questions , ask away !

Ruby you didn't get anything done ?
What a bugger !
Have they rebooked you ?
(I was cancelled when I went in for my mastectomy , and I burst into tears too . So you're not alone there)

Oh Ruby - sorry you got upset, its horrid having to sit about doing nothing with no company - too much time for your mind to wander and to start thinking about 'stuff'. You've had a hell of a lot to deal with - it would be strange if it didn't get a bit overwhelming a times. And a bit rubbish that you had to sit and wait on your own, - our hospital is like that, - and its OK if you don;t have to wait long, but hanging around for hours alone is miserable.

Annoying that your procedure was cancelled (although good that you don't mind) -have they given you a new date?

Anyway big you are a gorgeous girl and we love you xx

Oh no ruby -I cried when cancelled my procedure and boo that won't let your dad wait with you.

Really - sorry it wasn't better news but glad bosses supportive and you got some pyjamas. As others have said, node involvement is common and lots of others had it and are out the other side.

Ate lots of bread, brioche at weekend and had gorgeous meal out at bistro which ended with proper crepe suzette.

Knackered today so spent most if this morning asleep and arm hurting like hell still - more painkillers needed I think plus day of woo tomorrow again which should help.

Oh no Ruby what a pain. I hope you get a new date asap. When are you due to start Uni?

And another vote for ruby the amazing here x

Hello all, I'm new to this thread

I had lumpectomy 11 days ago, and sentinel node removal. I was given my results today. Lump classed as 6mm grade 2. But cancer cells were present in one of the five nodes removed. I'm so disappointed!!!

I meet the oncologist tomorrow. I'm expecting to have Onco DX test to help them decide if I should undergo chemo or not.
I went into appt expecting to get details on when I'd start Radiotherapy ...

I'm holding it together, but I feel sick to my stomach.

P.s. Really - the story of your surgery is almost a complete replica of mine! Down to the admission time, delayed surgery and resulting overnight stay.

Hello MomOfTwo -and welcome to the thread, although of course sorry you have had to join us. Sorry also that you had bad news today - it is a a shock and takes a day or two to get your head round it, and I'm sure we all identify with that sick feeling - its quite normal to feel pretty wobbly until it sinks in.

from you user name I'm guessing you have little ones? - there are several people on here with young DC who will be able to give tips on how to talk to children about it all.

Its good you are seeing your onc, tomorrow - not too long to wait before you get more info. and a clearer plan of action. IME having some sort of plan, and knowing what the next step is, makes it a bit less scary and uncertain. And you can focus on what is coming next and deal with that.

Do you have someone who can go to appointments with you for support? A tip I always say is to write down anything you want to ask and take your notebook in with you - its very easy to forget what you wanted to say, and also handy to write down anything they say, because again - it can sometimes be hard to take it all in. (Or if you have someone with you, they can take notes for you)

Good luck with your appt, tomorrow - I hope it all goes well and you feel a bit less shaky afterwards. Stick around for handholding, cake and [tea] xx

Really...drat and double drat. Large for you whilst they sort that lot out. The odds are still jolly good at the moment, by the way. In case that helps.

Ruby, argh re today!! Not what you need.

Gigs, grr re hurty arm. Not good. Woo aplenty tomorrow, I hope.

MomofTwo, welcome! Though sad you're joining us of course as no-one wants to be on this journey. Hmm, small slow grumpy lump, yours then. Always scary when anyone finds out there are cells in nodes, but the nodes are there to stop the cells going anywhere else. They're the fish net for the body. So it's not the bad news it first sounds like. Luckily the modern treatments are not fun but they really do work for nearly everyone. Let us know what's what with oncologist tomorrow?

Better be all round, I think.

DH got home to find the police in our garden after an attempted break in. Luckily nothing taken and no damage done, though neighbours had stuff taken from their outbuildings. Argh.

Oh amber - that's a bit scary - glad nothing was taken, - not a nice feeling though that someones been trying to get in.

really sorry it wasn't better new, bugger - but as has been said it's the node's job to catch all the "rubbish"

momof2 - welcome but sorry you find yourself here and that you didn't get better news today. Any qus just shout, nothing is off limits here :)

gigs I`hope you get some relief from the pain in your arm :(

ruby* - cancellation is rubbish :( I'm not suprised you cried

amber - wow that's a bit scary - I hope you and DH are okay, it can shake you up a bit - passes medicinal

to everyone else

Spent this morning trying to get my craft room sorted - we swapped DS's bedroom and my craft room over during the school holidays and there have been boxes of my stuff stacked everywhere for weeks... (DH says I have enough stuff to open my own shop ) - so now I'm knackered... Enjoying the last few days before my next poisoning as I'm expecting to be in bed this time next week...

Ruby I'm sorry it was cancelled and that you had to wait on your own that's just rubbish I would have cried lots too x x

Mum of 2 welcome but sorry you have to be here. 6mm and grade 2 sounds positive but shame about the node. Hope you find this thread as supportive as I have, ask us anything at all, rant, cry, talk about your day whatever will help x

Amber that must have been really scary

Hugs all round I think x x

Welcome Momoftwo , shitty that you have to join us , but you are very welcome !

Amber that was scarey I'm sure !
Thank goodness nothing was taken .

I need more wool .
DDs teacher goes on maternity leave in a couple of weeks , and I'm meant to be making a blanket for her .
Need to get my arse in gear .
I was thinking yellow and white as we don't know what flavour she is having ?

Very jealous of Betsy having a craft room !
(Although friend who is a primary teacher told me they have a craft table at school . And the standing joke is it stands for "Can't Remember A Fucking Thing )

Sorry your day didn't go to plan ruby but you sound fairly positive and upbeat about it.

Hi mumoftwo your right our stories sound very alike, sadly! You'll be glad you posted on here, these ladies are a fountain of knowledge, and are amazingly supportive!

I have just had the best end to my shit day. I went down to help with my little monsters bath time. They were soooooooooo excited about me being there. They both told me they had missed me so much, and that they love me, and when was I coming back to take them to school/nursery. Then the youngest told me, I looked so pretty! He is a little charmer, but seeing how excited and happy they were, to see me, made my day!

I am going to help out tomorrow evening too. I can't wait I love the fact that the children don't care about the surgery, or the fact I've been dealing with all this crap. They care about me, being back with them dealing with their lives. Kids are an amazing pick me up

Xxxxx

he he topsy Can't Remember where I've put A Fucking Thing would have been perfect for my old craft room, but I'm determined to be more organised now (don't have a choice really as the room is only 9'x9') I've "found" loads of stuff I'd forgotten I'd bought :) I definitely have more than enough stuff to last my lifetime, even if by some miracle I live to 90

x-post really - I know just what you mean, the kids (mine are 5 & 7) keep me going and provide a welcome distraction of fun and laughter. :)

Ruby That was another fine experience your hospital has put you through. I suppose at least you weren't in a cupboard this time. I get more angry each time I read about your latest experience. No wonder you were crying. Do they ever ask their patients what they could do to make their experience of treatment a bit easier? You cope with it with such good humour, they don't deserve you. I hope you get another date soon. When do you go off to uni? I just dropped Big Pigeons off at her latest student flat via the inevitable trip to IKEA. As you would expect she had to leave the desk we got last year behind as she has one at the new flat, but buy a Billy bookcase for her because there isn't a bookcase at the new one (but a huge one in her last room). I may have contributed obscenely to landfill with all the Billy book cases I have bought and tipped over the years.... We followed around lots of parent and student combinations. We also bought a fluffy white unicorn head, with leaves in it's mane , I know that you find Big and Little Pigeons IKEA purchasing desires inspiring

Reallyand Mom It is shitty when you find out it is in your nodes, it is usually incremental and so just feels like one bit of bad news after another. Mine showed up in a PET scan, Consultant having not picked it up in ultrasound either, the technician refused to tell me even though it was pretty bloody obvious that he was taking lots of readings so I imagined the worst until they were removed. However those of us who are in the positive nodes club on here probably outnumber the ones that aren't and in my group of friends who went through all this twelve years ago we are all still here even those with 7 and 8 involved. We were all also moms of two small kids

gigs Sorry you are now paying for your Paris fun but I'm sure a bit of woo will do wonders.

Little pigeons has come home very down as the sixth form were kept back this morning to be told that one of them has just been told that his Cancer treatment has not worked and there is nothing more they can do. His older sister is in her year as well. It is such a horrible horrible disease and little pigeons has no illusions about it. It sounds as though they were very good about telling them the facts without any smaltz and sentimentality, offering those who need it / are close counselling and telling them not to make a fuss of his sister, but to talk if she wants to. Very very sad.

So sorry that it has been a shitty day for Really, Ruby, and even Amber. Hope for a brighter day tomorrow - I am going in to discuss lung drainage with onc.

I have been trying to find a holiday let in France with a large pool and six double bedrooms (we go with extended family) . I am a bit nervous about booking for a year ahead but sod it, I have to stay positive!

really what a fabulous boost :) you must be a wonderful nanny. The children sound very sweet.

Thank you everyone :) the crying came before the cancellation though that was the embarrassing thing haha, it was just being all alone for hours in a cubicle thingy in the place where most of the rubbish of the last year or so has been focused! I'm feeling much better now after a little nap and dinner and game of cards :)

topsy I remember you asked us about the blanket a while back, yellow would be gorgeous, it'll make a lovely change from all the blue or pink stuff she will get when the baby is born!

MomofTwoGirls welcome but sorry you've found yourself here :( and especially sorry for today's rubbish news. Give yourself time to take it all in. It will seem much more manageable once you've got a plan.

betsy it's surprising how tiring it is sorting craft stuff isn't it! We sorted lots last week and got rid of most :( I was torn as so many lovely ribbons but no idea how I'd use them.

amber what an utterly horrible fright :( just knowing someone tried to get into your property I hope the police catch them. for you!

gigs boo to pain, I hope tomorrow's woo puts it right :)

kurri you're so kind. I knew you would all understand. My dad came to collect me but mum came too and she isn't great with emotions, quite impatient, and didn't get what I meant at all. She would probably have used the time to create lists and plans and mentally organise a few cupboards or something :)

I love you all lots :) x