Is there such a thing as a reasonable, well-adjusted, non-dysfunction, normal f***king doctor's receptionist?

[Caligula]

Or is that a myth like King Arthur will return when Britain is in great danger?

DS has been ill all day. Can I see my GP? No, I have to phone the out of hours emergency service and drive 8 miles. Even though the surgery is open, and I've said I don't mind waiting for a gap when someone turns up. The costs to the environment is irrelevant; the fact that if I didn't have a car and it would cost me £20 is irrelevant; the fact that I'm supposed to have a personal bloody relationship with my GP and the government keeps telling me that I need a GP because of a personal bloody relationship that doesn't exist, is irrelevant.

Why do I need a GP at all, if I can never see him? Why can't I just go to any old doctor? I just hate this gatekeeper system, and I hate the f*ing bitch who considers herself the gatekeeper to the doctor, even more. Seriously, every single time I have asked to see a doctor when this woman is on duty, I have been refused. It must be some kind of record. I wouldn't mind if I could just go to the out of hours service every time, because I don't like my doctor anyway, particularly, and would much prefer to keep any doctor I ever see at arms length (personal relationship my arse) but no, they tell me I have to see my GP when he's open. They're really annoyed (with me, not with the receptionist) that I'm coming to see them when my GP's surgery is open.

Ah, feel better now I've got that off my chest.

Not read all these but my doctors' surgery is really good.

Phone lines open at 8.30am so you have to stand on redial but usually within 20 mins you get through and I always, always get an appointment the same day.

I only ever phone for my girls so maybe the fact that the appt is for a child makes a difference.

They are a Health Centre and have about 5 doctors and 4 Practice Nurses, so if you can't see the doc, the nurse can look at mysterious rashes/examine chests etc.

I phoned for an appt for dd2 age 4 last week. Twenty minutes on the phone on redial, then when I finally got through, all the appointments were gone. But, I could go and wait at the end of surgery and she'd definitely be seen by a doctor - so I went. In the car she announced she wanted to be sick so when I got to the surgery I asked where the nearest loos were in case we needed to make a dash for it. One receptionist came out immediately with a sick bowl and kitchen towel and the other fiddled the list so we went in almost immediately. And they said if she was actually sick to let them know and they would get her a drink of water, another sick bowl, more kitchen towel.
They were great, really helpful and I now think I should write and thank them just so that they know how much I appreciated their help and kindness.

I must admit, next time I am job hunting I want to apply to doc's surgery as receptionist - I know it can be frustrating etc dealing with the public, but you have to remember you are dealing with real live human beings, and patients are not simply there to annoy you!! (I currently work as an administrator for a counselling service, so I'm sure I'm already halfway there, in terms of patience, confidentiality etc) Got to change things from within, it's the only way.

To those who expressed horror at my story would like to explain that afterwards, was just so grateful my child survived, these things just didn't seem important anymore. I now am way more assertive and would not even bother getting into a dialogue with a frigging receptionist if there was something I was concerned about. I only ever go to the docs if i need antibiotics. Anything else can be sorted by common sense, pharmacy or A and E IME :)

We used to have to beg and plead with a receptionist for an urgent appointment. The system is better now because a triage nurse phones you straight back.

I like the nurses - they give good advice, get you in with the doctor if you need to, or see you themselves and are always fantastic. I'd almost rather see a nurse with childrens stuff, because they're often mums too and have seen it all before.

The receptionists though...oh dear, lets not even go there. 'Attitude' and 'problem' must be part of the job description. God help the patients with blood pressure!

No. My mother is completely dysfunctional (I mean, she's completely barking in a 'The Shining' sort of way & what makes her even worse is that she was the receptionist at the homeopathic doctors that Prince Charles attends somewhere posh in London.

Can you imagine?!? I'm amazed I survived to adulthood. She's scary.

I have learnt over the years how you handle these receptionists.Use a polite but assertive voice.Stay calm and be very insistant you should be seen that day if it's urgent.And never tell them what exactly the problem is.If you still can't get past them phone again and just ask when you can speak to the doctor then phone him and explain the prioblem.He will usually sort you out an appointment on the day.

haven't had a chance to read all of the posts but I actually changed surgery because I was so hacked of with the receptionists at the old surgery...

ds was 3 months old and coughing his little heart out, including any food I managed to get into him. Was walking past the surgery in the morning anyhow so went in to enquire whether a doctor or the nurse could possibly have a look at him sometime during the day, being very nice about it. What did I get? 'did you call to see whether there is an appointment?' and that I really need to call before I drop in. Erhem, I didn't drop in to demand to be seen there and then ffs! I just enquired as I would have by phone. Then she proceeded to tell me that I could come by at 1630 but no guarantee that ds would be seen... ffs 3 month old baby coughing and vomiting you'd think she'd keep me there and try and squeeze me in.

The surger where I am nwo the receptionists are great, though I never get to see the same doc twice :)