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Original poster

Someone help me :( !!!!

12 replies

Meganlillymai · 23/02/2013 21:43

Where to even start since I was younger I've always worried about cancer ever other week I diagnose myself with different cancers. Latly I've been petrified of lymphoma as I found a lump in my cheek over 2 month ago that doc said was just a lymphnode and wasn't worried. The lump hasn't changed in size at all but now I'm full of cold and my glands behind my ears are slightly up so I'm back to thinkin I have lymphoma. I'm terrified of the docs. Not the actual doctors but what the outcome might be. I know everyone will say go for piece of mind but if it was that easy for me I'd of been by now. I just don't no what to do anymore it gets me down all the time!

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peapop · 23/02/2013 21:55

I think you need to tell your gp just how much this concerns you. you can't go through life constantly worrying like this. I know only too well as I am a natural worrier and if I don't talk about it it builds up and becomes overwhelming.
Go back just to double check it is ok but talk to your gp too, be honest about how you're feeling amd take it from there.

Yotamsrazor · 23/02/2013 22:01

That sounds really miserable megan. Have you had or considered counselling to help you work on strategies for managing this anxiety? If not, I think a trip to the GP would be v useful.

I think it's normal to be scared of getting cancer, or of the people we love getting it, but if it's really impacting on your quality of life, to the point where you are on permanent red-alert looking out for signs and symptoms, then you need some help in working through this fear.

You shouldn't have to live with such anxiety. It's miserable and exhausting and the thing with phobias is no amount of reassurance will truly put your mind at rest. So the phobia itself, rather than visits to GP, to rule out different cancers whenever you are worried, is what needs tackling. Hopefully your GP will be able to refer you to someone who will be able to help.

Original poster
Meganlillymai · 23/02/2013 22:02

If only it was that easy. My gp is German I can barly understand him and all he tells me is I'm 22 and healthy.... I'm just such a worrier

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Original poster
Meganlillymai · 23/02/2013 22:06

I could speak to me about helping me find out who to talk to and how to go about it. He's an amazing doctor but he's usless when it comes to the açtualy talking bit he jus says what he think (he's properly right) and I always feel better after I've been but I just wish I could get this anxiety out my way! My mam keeps telling me I'm 22 I have a cold that's why my glands are up and I agree and then I start thinking more into it and why I have the bloody cold in the first place... It's draining

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Lucyellensmum95 · 23/02/2013 22:09

You could be me - once i was hysterical at the doctors because i happened to notice i had tonsils (but of course they wern't tonsils, they were throat cancer) Hmm It is no way to live your life, it drove me to a nervous breakdown that i only got through wiht the help of MN actually. Please talk to your doctor about your fears - they are not completely irrational, cancer is scary shite but your level of anxiety is too much.

If you poke around your neck and face you WILL find lumps and if you keep poking you will make them bigger because they are lymph glands, salivary glands that are SUPPOSED TO BE THERE. Most of the time you dont notice them but you will find them if you look - i remember walking around tescos once, literally pawing at my neck and throat, i ran back out of the shop telling my DP that i was going to die Blush

I was put on ADs and it did help. I do still suffer from anxiety but funilly enough i dont have health anxiety (which is what you have) anymore. I do worry but i just wont let it get the better of me. So now i never google (difficult, im a biology lecturer!) and just wont allow worries to fester.

The ADs helped me better than counselling did but some people respond better to counselling - talk to your GP to find out what your best approach is.

Original poster
Meganlillymai · 23/02/2013 22:13

Thankyou Lucy! It's so good to see I'm not the only one. Even talking on here I feel betters just to let it all out and get out what I'm thinking instead of it all bottling up. I have my good days and bad like everyone else I suppose. I think il phone my docs and speak with him over the phone to see where he can lead me from there, I've poked and prodded my neck for nearly 2 weeks a, no wonder there swollen.....

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Lucyellensmum95 · 23/02/2013 22:13

Can you ask to speak to the practice nurse? a lady doctor if your GP isn't supportive - it is very bad of him to dismiss this, Health Anxiety is a recognised disorder that responds really well to treatment. Please find someone to talk to - do you have children? A health visitor maybe?

Go to your doctor - tell him that you want a referral for a pyschiatric assesment, he can't refuse. That sounds drastic but all it will be is a chat and they will refer you to a counsellor and maybe suggest ADs.

Original poster
Meganlillymai · 23/02/2013 22:24

I have a darlin little girl. My lillymai. I had a c section with her n after that I had every stomach problem you can imagine.. Well I thought I did but it was all in my mind. I've diagnosed myself with bowel throat and even cheek caner in the past year!! Saying it sounds silly I know but I'm terrible. And now uve diagnosed myself with lymphoma even though I only have 1 symptom!! (Swollen lymph nodes) but I also have a cold... (Why there swollen) its so hard cos I know myself I'm being stupie but getting myself to really believe it seems impossible

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Lucyellensmum95 · 23/02/2013 22:30

you are not being stupid - (i too have had all those cancers Blush) but your anxiety levels are too high. It is really common to get this after you have children so please don't feel it is just you, you would be surprised - if you do a search for health anxiety on here you will find loads of threads.

I have always been a bit paranoid but it became ridiculous after i had DD and i was eventually diagnosed with PND.

If you still have a health visitor maybe talk to her and ask her to refer you if you find your doctor difficult to talk to.

Original poster
Meganlillymai · 23/02/2013 22:34

That's a great idea. I fel more comfortable talking to a nurse or health visitors I get scared to talk to doctors incase he tells me I need MRI or CAT scans!!

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Yotamsrazor · 24/02/2013 09:25

Megan can you change doctors? Are you living in Germany? If so, you really need someone who is fluent in English because it's hard enough having something like this, without not being able to really talk on a more emotional level. Definitely though, if you think it would be easier talking to a nurse/HV then that's a great idea as hopefully they will have some idea as to what is available in your area. Huge good luck.

Original poster
Meganlillymai · 24/02/2013 10:28

No England. And he's I'm going to. I feel better today just wish this cold would piss off my face is achin lol x

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