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General health

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Original poster

vasectomy.....can dh have one at 29 or is he considered to young?

24 replies

poi · 12/04/2006 15:38

We're 100% sure we don't want any more children (2 already). Other contraceptive methods are driving me mad. He is happy to have one.

OP posts:

jampots · 12/04/2006 15:41

dh had one when he was 30 - ds was 3 months old.

expatinscotland · 12/04/2006 15:42

dh is 28 and tried to get one. was told he needed to be 30 - we have 2 children as well.

Moomin · 12/04/2006 15:43

only thing i know is that not many clinics will consider doing one until at least a year after your last baby

gscrym · 12/04/2006 15:44

DH was 35. The doctor wasn't happy to refer as we only had one child and he was only a couple of months old when DH asked for a referral. Would have went private if GP hadn't agreed. If we had had a baby when DH was 30, we would still have been asking for snip.

expatinscotland · 12/04/2006 16:10

That's ridiculous that someone who's friggin' THIRTY-FIVE years old is treated like he/she can't make a decision like that about their own body.

I mean, wtf? MY body, MY choice.

And I find the 'what if your kids died and you'd been sterilised' line disgusting. As if kids can be replaced by just having more. Or as if I need to validate every relationship I'm in by having a kid w/the partner. Hell, I'd have dozens if that were the case :o.

gscrym · 12/04/2006 16:13

I know. When the GP asked DH 'what if your son died, what would you do', DH replied 'well I wouldn't be trying to replace him would I'. After that, they referred him. Still took almost a year to get seen.

desperateSCOUSEstrife · 12/04/2006 16:17

dh was 31 or 32 when he had the V

Original poster

poi · 12/04/2006 16:29

Thanks girls, just need to persuade him to make that trip to the GP now!!!

OP posts:

gscrym · 12/04/2006 16:30

Tell him if he doesn't go, it's 2 bricks and a bag of frozen peas for pain relief.

intergalacticwalrus · 12/04/2006 16:32

Dp wants to "go to the vets" after we have had this baby, he's 31. I think he'll be really pissy when the GP asks about if one of our children died. I didn't know they asked that.

If we had another baby after this, I think DP would have a heart attck. The snip will do wonders for his health

gscrym · 12/04/2006 16:35

Bricks and frozen peas all round then!

expatinscotland · 12/04/2006 16:40

they ask, intergal. they also ask 'if you and your partner split and you meet someone else and blah blah blah'. if i met someone else and he wanted kids he'd need to find someone else. that'd be the end. been there, bought the tshirt. don't want to ride that merry go round again. am old enough to be able to figure that out.

Passionflower · 12/04/2006 16:44

DH had one when he was 29 and he went for referral when DD3 was only a month old. He already had 4 LO's though and the Dr was happy that we both knew what we were doing. Have to pay privately here though as can't get it on states health insurance. Short sighted IMO.

Mercy · 12/04/2006 16:46

I know two men who have had this done.

One already had 4 children (2 different relationships) which meant he automatically qualified for NHS treatment even though he was just under 30.

The second was had 2 children and was about 34 at the time and he and his wife were referred for a brief counselling session beforehand. The emphasis was not on 'what if one of your children died' but 'what if you and your wife got divorced' and 'what if your wife died'. I think more fathers generally speaking have subsequent relationships than mothers do, so I personally think the questions were fair enough.

I also agree that it's a minor op. for a man compared to a woman being sterilised or indeed having to deal with an unwanted/unexpected pregnancy.

desperateSCOUSEstrife · 12/04/2006 16:48

dh never had all this questioning stuff
he just went into docs and asked for a referral
he had the snip a few weeks later

renaldo · 12/04/2006 16:50

you do have to remember though you are absolutely sure now you dont know what the future holds and quite a lot of people do regret thier decision and try a reversal..
\link{http://www.umm.edu/patiented/articles/what_factors_should_be_considered_before_a_vasectomy_000037_2.htmsee this link}
the doctors are only doing thier job by questioning you both thoroughly

expatinscotland · 12/04/2006 16:52

how many kids did he have, scouse, cuz that makes a BIG difference.

one of my mum's cousins had FIVE kids by the time she was 26. her husband was the same age. the second he uttered 'i have five kids' as his reason for wanting sterilised they referred him for the snip.

renaldo · 12/04/2006 16:53

sorry

\link{http://www.umm.edu/patiented/articles/what_factors_should_be_considered_before_a_vasectomy_000037_2.htm\see this link}

joanna4 · 12/04/2006 16:53

My hubby was 31 I am sure of it.

desperateSCOUSEstrife · 12/04/2006 16:56

expat he has 2 from prev
and 2 we have together
he has also taken on my 4 from prev marriage

he said he was getting too old for all the baby lark iykwim and wanted me to be sterilised
but as i pointed out to him
he would be done and dusted in 10 mins and sore bollies for a few days
where i would be in hosp for 3 days so he would have to manage the house on his own

that thought scared him shitless, so he took the snip option instead

Sparklemagic · 12/04/2006 18:01

my DH had his in his early thirties, and we have just one child. Dr. didn't question him in anyway about his decision, even about just having one child.

He simply wrote on his referral form "family complete".

peaches27 · 13/04/2006 19:59

DH had one at 29, we had a boy and a girl and were sure, it was on the NHS, consultant saw us both and just made sure we were sure.

Eulalia · 13/04/2006 20:30

Dh doesn't ever want to have one and he is 60... just had our 3rd baby 8 months ago. If he had one however during his previous relationship (has 3 grown up kids) I doubt if we would have stayed together. I was 24 when we met and he was 44. I wanted kids and so did he (again) and fortuantely he was able to. I think its this kind of thing that can happen. No-one wants to think they will get divorced but unfortunatley it does happen and really my dh has had a completely new lease of life with me and our 3 kids. OK he is 'old' but we are happy. I think the link that renaldo provided covers a lot of good points.

lact8 · 13/04/2006 20:36

Does anyone know how many children you have to have to fall into the automatically qualify for a vasectomy category?

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