don't know where to post this but feeling really crappy

[smilingthroughgrittedteeth]

As the title says really I'm not sure if this is the right place but I'm feeling to vulnerable for IABU and to much traffic in chat, I just want a bit of a moan and then if you all want to tell me I'm being unreasonable then that's fine but hopefully someone can help me.

I'm 29 and I'm a nanny, after months of feeling tired, sick and dizzy I was diagnosed with an under-active thyroid about 3 weeks ago am on medication to correct it but currently haven't found the right dosage so still feel like I'm only firing on about 50%, when I say I'm tired I can't describe the bone aching exhaustion I feel. I am also waiting for a scan as my periods are so unbearably painful and heavy. This has been going on for about a year and a half so I am feeling very run down, last week I caught a stomach bug so had to take 2 days off of work (the only 2 days I have had off in 3.5yrs). I feel like the bug has wiped me of any stores of energy I had left and have been lightheaded and dizzy, I had a dizzy spell coming down the stairs slipped and managed to hurt my foot so am now hobbling around! to top it all yesterday I started my period so have cramps and have had a very high temperature.

So in summary I am exhausted, have stomach cramps, diarreah, feel sick and dizzy, have a temperature that hit 41.3 yesterday afternoon, have a headache, shooting pains going up and down my arms/legs/wrists and a sore, swollen and bruised foot (I know I sound like a hyperchondriact but I promise its all true)

Yesterday I felt so unwell that I allowed my charges to chose something for tea from tesco they chose lasagne, for the first time ever I fed them a ready made meal, usually everything is cooked from scratch and is healthy, there is also usually batches of food in the freezer but where I was off last week bosses have used them and there was nothing in there to just reheat, I truely could not have stood up long enough to have even made scrambled eggs, in retrospect I should have just stuck a pizza in the oven or jacket potato but at the time all I could think of was getting home from school, feeding them and getting them bathed and ready for bed.

This morning my boss reprimanded me for feeding them ready made processed food (fair enough), he then told me I have to write a menu for the next week, and gave me a lecture on giving the children veg with every meal, for the record I do, I've been a nanny for 10yrs and have always made healthy homemade meals full of vegetables, this was a one off after months of feeling ill and my employers know how ill I have been, I just could not cope I had already rang and begged my boss to come home early.

I have been in tears all morning and just need someone to tell me if I am over reacting because I feel so unwell and accept that I did the wrong thing and take the telling off that I got or should I infact say something to defend myself since it really was a one off in exceptional circumstances?

I have made a doctors appointment for tomorrow and plan on asking to be signed off since im clearly not capable of doing my job to my usual standard but I'm also wondering if doing this is just a reaction to what happened this morning!

I've tried not to take time off because my bosses struggle with back up childcare.

God that's long, I'm sorry

I guess all I want to know is, am I doing the right thing in asking to be signed off? I don't want to cause problems on a knee jerk reaction but unless I can find ways with support from my employeers to make work easier then I can't cope.

I'm just so tired and unwell I don't actually know which way to turn

I think your boss is an idiot. Feeding a ready-meal once in a blue moon because you are feeling dreadful is more than reasonable behaviour. If you were my nanny, I'd be insisting that you take a few days off even if it screwed up my childcare plans. You have a temperature over 40 degrees FGS! At the very least he should be concerned that you have an infection you could pass on to your charges.

A lot of this will clear up once you get your medication right, but you sound exhausted and in dire need of a couple of weeks off to rest and recharge your batteries. It will speed up your recovery and make you better able to work than if you try to power through it (which might not work and actually see you collapsing).

I don't know how this would work for you financially. You may have to rely on SSP if your boss needs the money to pay for backup childcare, but if there's anyway you can manage to take a couple of weeks off, I'd really recommend you do it. It will benefit everyone longer term.

Thank you, I really am doubting my own judgement but your right I need to take some time off to get well

Well, you need to do two things in this order.

Get yourself down to A&E. A temperature of 41.3 is NOT NORMAL and could be indicative of a serious bacterial infection.

Tell your bosses you need time off and are not safe to be left with the children. This is true. Imagine if you passed out while looking after them.

Finally, when you feel better you need to have a long talk to them about how they need to value you properly or you are going to leave. You do not give someone a telling off and ask them to write a meal plan when they are ill, you ask them what you can do to help.