Never had a smear test-HELP

[SirVixofVixHall]

I need one.obv. I've been really nervous partly as I'm shy and self conscious, partly due to an assault when I was younger. Anyway, I have a slight lumpy area which I need checking and am worried it could be HPV, and need the smear too. Would the nurse at my GP be able to tel if it is an HPV thing? OR would I be better off going to a bigger health centre. No Marie Stopes near me or I would go there. I am dreading seeing a nurse who isn't sure and then having to go through it all again. Have only slept with DH in 20 years, had one other partner who I used condoms with, but I guess HPV is stil possible? I know I sound really silly but am in a complete panic.

Good luck with your smear, I think you are doing exactly the right thing.

My top tip is to wear a long loose skirt. Then you only need to whip your pants off before you hop on the bed. Keep the skirt covering your legs for as long as you need to and then just whip it up while the nurse actually does the smear. Then drop it back and jump off the bed - ta da!

Oh, and don't take your 3yo who will insist on a running commentary from the other side of the curtain .

+1 to piprabbit's advice!

You should get it all checked.

HPV can be present without warts- as someone else said.

You don't necessarily have warts with HPV.

You need a smear in any case.

You also need someone to look at your vulva. Look- it's just another part of your body. I know this is hard to accept but to a medic it's simply a bit of the body- it is not special to them like it is to you!

I don't want to worry you but any unusual lumps and bumps should be ckecked out as vulval cancer is one cause, and other problems like lichen sclerosis.

You could go to a walk in GU clinic , or even a family planning clinic where the staff are usually all female.

Just do it!

I called today, but the nearest appointment they had was the end of May. I thought I could get it done quite quickly. I really don't want to wait that long, my father is very ill at the mo and I'm under enough stress. They do have a family planning clinic so I now have to call them to see if they can do it. Otherwise I suppose private? I live very far away from any large town so that is more tricky.

I did tell the receptionist I'd never had one before and had psyched myself into calling and so couldn't face waiting that long, but she didn't suggest anything other than calling the family planning clinic. I don't think I could deal with waiting for a cancellation, (although that was a good idea,) I want to fix a date so that I can relax a bit. Also my cycle is slightly erratic and next week would probably be fine but harder to predict later than that. Would be horrible if I had to cancel it after waiting for weeks. I will have to wait until Monday now, will call the family planning people and see what they say. Do GUM clinics do smears?

If you'd like the other issue looked at then you can make an appointment to see the GP and ask if they'd take the smear as well. It would be better probably to see a practice nurse as they do more of them.
GUM do take smears occasionally, also check whether there are any well woman clinics. Some of the FPCs are open in the evening too.