Should I complain about this doctor?

[fluffydressinggown]

To preface, I have named changed and I don't want compensation or anything just to make the doctor aware of how she made me feel.

I cut myself (self harm) yesterday afternoon, it was a longish and deep cut so I went to A&E.

After a 3 hour wait I saw the doctor. She stitched my leg with 10 normal stitches (the amount is relevant), I expressed concern that as the wound was gaping quite a bit it might not close very well. I also did not feel that she had given me adequate local anaesthetic because I could feel the needle going in as she did the stitches and it was pretty painful. At this point she said "well you shouldn't have self harmed then." She also asked me my job. I am a teacher and in response to this she said "it is just playing with children and not very stressful."

I had to dress the wound myself, she did not wash her hands at all throughout the procedure and she seemed to really struggle with actually doing them and they looked really loose and the wound was left gaping inbetween the stitches.

Got up this morning and 7 of the stitches had opened up and come out and the wound was gaping. Rang A&E and they said to come back. Seen again by a different doctor who referred me to plastics straight away. 10 internal stitches and 20 normal stitches later my leg is properly closed up, I had to have the wound re-opened and the edges cut open again so they could close properly and it took about 2 hours for them to sew me up.

My husband is fuming that the first doctor did such a shoddy job and she said what she said to me. The doctor I saw today also suggested I complain.

Part of me thinks that I should just get over it and because it was self harm I kind of deserve everything I get. The other part of me is frustrated that she did such a poor job of managing the wound and I had to go back again today and spend another 5 hours at hospital being treated.

AIBU to complain or just being fussy?

Complain.

How dare she judge you, that is not her job!!!

Hope you are okay, and getting the support you need.

No, complain.

You have an illness, it's not your fault and you deserve proper treatment.

Complain.

You have an illness. How would we feel if it were our daughter being treated that way?

Definitely complain. It could happen to another vulnerable person, perhaps someone without any family support. Hope you are feeling better and so sorry you were treated so appallingly.

Tbh I am more upset about the shockingly bad wound care I was given. I knew that those stitches were inadequate (unfortunately I have had stitches for self harm quite a lot - although not recently) and I tried to explain my worries. She just didn't seem to put any thought into what she was doing. The doctors today were quite shocked that she had not referred me on to plastics.

It is hard though because I feel so guilty for wasting everyone's time in A&E when there are genuinely unwell people waiting and I am there because I am basically a twat.

Complain! Put yourself in someone else's shoes - say it was your best friend or mother/father or daughter/son going through what you are. Would you expect them to tolerate this unprofessional, uncaring, downright fucking awful behaviour and treatment?

If not for yourself, then make a noise about this for someone else's sake.

You self harm.
That does not mean you 'deserve' anything

Would you say that about someone turning up in A & E drunk?
Would you say that about someone obese?
Would you say that about someone who smokes?

Nope. Everyone deserves proper care.

A modern version of the hypocratic oath:
I swear to fulfill, to the best of my ability and judgment, this covenant:

I will respect the hard-won scientific gains of those physicians in whose steps I walk, and gladly share such knowledge as is mine with those who are to follow.

I will apply, for the benefit of the sick, all measures [that] are required, avoiding those twin traps of overtreatment and therapeutic nihilism.

I will remember that there is art to medicine as well as science, and that warmth, sympathy, and understanding may outweigh the surgeon's knife or the chemist's drug.

I will not be ashamed to say "I know not", nor will I fail to call in my colleagues when the skills of another are needed for a patient's recovery.

I will respect the privacy of my patients, for their problems are not disclosed to me that the world may know. Most especially must I tread with care in matters of life and death. If it is given to me to save a life, all thanks. But it may also be within my power to take a life; this awesome responsibility must be faced with great humbleness and awareness of my own frailty. Above all, I must not play at God.

I will remember that I do not treat a fever chart, a cancerous growth, but a sick human being, whose illness may affect the person's family and economic stability. My responsibility includes these related problems, if I am to care adequately for the sick.

I will prevent disease whenever I can, for prevention is preferable to cure.

I will remember that I remain a member of society with special obligations to all my fellow human beings, those sound of mind and body as well as the infirm.

If I do not violate this oath, may I enjoy life and art, be respected while I live and remembered with affection thereafter. May I always act so as to preserve the finest traditions of my calling and may I long experience the joy of healing those who seek my help.

COMPLAIN

You are not and you're not wasting everybodys time. Please don't feel bad. Sorry the doctor was bad to you.

I would complain. And you are ill. Self harming is part of a illness and part of the treatment is stitching you up properly

Oh definitely complain.

It sounds like this doctor has difficulty both in wound care, and also in dealing with deliberate self harm. Both are huge parts of A+E work.

If you complain then her supervisor will see the complaint and can assess her educational needs in this area, and help her to address them.

Do complain.

How are you feeling now? And what led to you self harming again? It sounds as though you must have been feeling pretty desperate...

You need to complain. She did a very bad job of taking care of your wound.

you should not have been treated any differently from someone who had received an injury from falling etc, so you are perfectly justified in complaining

Did she or anyone you saw suggest counselling? no offense and sorry if it something that has been suggested or tried before

I'm an A&E nurse, I very rarely agree with these 'should I complain' threads, but even I think you should complain. A&E staff see enough self-inflicted injuries to know that our judgement is not necessary or welcome, we are there to treat the physical injuries and refer to appropriate services to address the underlying illness. By the sounds of things, the doctor didn't even treat the physical injury properly. I wonder if she had undergone the appropriate training in wound closure?

Do complain. If she's a trainee it will go on her record/portfolio. She's failed you on two counts: wound care & attitude.

Same as feather, complain it's important she gets the feedback.

Harsh why and not really the same.

Fuck no YANBU your post has made me so angry for you.

Previous self harmer here and I have to say the common attitude even among professionals is utterly disgusting.

I was in a psychiatric unit for 6 months, run by someone who had become a psychiatrist because of schizophrenia in his family (a fair reason). However he made it perfectly clear that he had no time for people with depression or self harm. His view was (and I quote) "SHers are manipulative, attention seeking and a waste of space". This was the man in charge of my Wellbeing. I was treated like dirt because this view filtered down to other staff members.

One time after a consultation with him (where again he made his opinion perfectly clear) I cut myself so badly there was blood on the walls. Nurse found me and just sent me to the sluice to clean the room up. I felt like a guilty puppy having my nose rubbed in it. I was so humiliated and I didn't even get to say why I did it.

I never complained. Please do it, you have support from us at least - views like this need to be challenged.

Also, I am sorry you needed to hurt yourself yesterday. We are here to talk about that too, if you need to.

Gosh Why that's disgusting. OP please ignore why.

why - how do you know she is not getting treatment?!?

OP - you think you deserve it because of your MH issues. The damning way you were treated will only add to your feelings of self loathing. Dr is a medical professional and should know better. I'm anti-complaining the vast majority of the time but I think you should definately complain.

Mediaclly she didn't do her job properly. The way she spoke to you was awful. I remember 'oh tried to kill yourself again, attention seeker'- it was second time in 2 months. I was severely depressed with no support network, my mother had died the year before and I took a kicking off my XP on a regular basis. I half wanted to die and half wanted help. I didn't have it in me to complain. Truthfully it never crossed my mind as I was so low and thought I deserved it. I didn't - I deserved understanding, empathy, care - just like you.

Please complain.

You won't be the only self harmer that person ever sees, and you could be helping someone else.

Sorry, whyisthatok, but you don't get it. Self harming is nothing like smoking and there is no magic 'help' to turn the need to do it off.

complain - she treated you appallinglh! and also had she referred you for help with the reason you are self harming? If not only failed you in not treating your physical wounds and insulting you when you were vulnerable but she did not ensure that you were referred for further help.