Ileoscopy and Feeling Very Down and Overwhelmed

[newbiedoobiedoo]

Hi everyone, this is actually for my dsis who is not on MN but I would like to show her any responses I get here!

Basically not too long ago dsis started suffering with severe abdominal pain. I won't go into the details because it's long but basically after 3 unsatisfactory trips to the A&E she was admitted to hospital in the week before Christmas. While in there her bowel perforated and she ended up having emergency surgery and now has the bag.

At the moment she has just come out of hospital having been kept in for 2 weeks after the surgery due to infections and complications, not least of which the wound becoming infected while she was in there.

She has to go back in for surgery in the future (they haven't said when) as the surgeon feels that the part of her bowel left in is very possibly diseased and that will have to be looked at.

On to my point! (Sorry, so long) She is really struggling with just everything. Obviously she is still weak and sore from the surgery, she is also very malnourished but is struggling to eat much and is still vomiting a fair bit. I know it's quite common to be very down after a surgery but I just think it's all gotten too much for her.

She is sad about it, tired of fighting and I think, tired of people telling her how great she is doing and how great it is that she didn't die! She realises that the surgery saved her life but it doesn't stop how she's feeling about having this bag, more than likely forever!

If anyone has been through or is going through similar I'd appreciate if you could post your experiences/stories or advice to maybe help her through this a little. :)

As footless says the stoma nurses are fab for practical advice and supplies. She's been through a big trauma, major surgery and a change to her body image, she's bound to feel down and unwell.
I work with a lady who has a colostomy and you wouldn't know unless she told you.

Hi thanks for the replies. Yes she has a stoma nurse, she actually came out to her today. I tell her it's something she needs to try to get used to but I told her not to even try to deal with it until her body is healed as she has no energy. Easier said than done I suppose!

I think you mean an ileostomy newbie. If you google this you might find some really useful stuff, from appliance manufacturers, ostomist websites and health organisation. The IA is probably the best place to start.

It is very early days and she will still be very unwell. She needs to allow plenty of time for her body to recover.

Your sister does need to pay great attention to her nutrition. Finding the right way to eat for her body will take time and emotional effort. It will pay off but it's not always quick to sort out.

The body image thing is tough. If she can talk about this now that's probably a better thing than bottling it all up and crashing later.

Perhaps you could help her with working out what to wear which still looks good but allows space for her ileostomy pouch?

In time she can adjust and live a normal life even with a poo bag, honest!

yes that's what I mean Glam - I should probably start off by calling it by the right bloody name! :)

Thank you for your advice and the website. I'll pass it on. I think the clothes thing is a good idea as it's a positive step to focus on, rather than just the negatives.

Stoma nurse has been with her this morning and thinks she's doing fine. She said she expects her to be up and at 'em in two weeks. I'll see her later but hope that was a little spur for her :)