Bad post birth care

[Weathermerrier]

Hi I'm new to this so bare with me!
Has anyone else since having a baby felt totally abandoned by the health service?
I've seen my health visitor once since the birth of my DS in October and I don't feel I have anyone I can contact if I'm worried about anything.
He just got over a bad case of viral meningitis which was left undiagnosed for a few days before he was rushed into hospital and I felt like it was all my fault because I didn't know that if a baby has a temperature u should take them to A&E
I just feel that sometimes mothers aren't given enough information about health, and what to do in certain situations.
He has a cough ATM and I have no idea what I'm supposed to do about it? I'm going to take him to a walk in centre soon but I just want to hear others opinions and whether or not I should complain?
It's like the NHS think that just because you are a mother it should all be instinct.
What do you think?

Seeing your HV once since LO arrived seems pretty poor. Do they run a drop in service or a postnatal support session or even a weigh in session where you could ask things?

As for the temperature, I think the advice is to go to the GP if the babys temperature reaches 39. The NHS website is a pretty good one is you want to know anything, here's what it says about www.nhs.uk/Planners/birthtofive/Pages/Recognisingsigns.aspx illness]].

Think though at the information you get regarding pregancy, childbirth and baby care is all pretty poor.

If you want to know anything though, have a look on the NHS website, or this book or just ask MN.

As for his cough, have you spoken to NHS direct?

Sorry my NHS link didn't work, here it it again

Where I live weather you don't see a HV at all. I had to spend three weeks begging a HV to come and see me and when she did, she asked why I had wanted her to come out since it did not appear DS was "at risk". I said I just had lots of questions and concerns and so on and she seemed amazed that I had bothered seeing her as just a standard first time mum.

Anyway, I took my DS to the doctor for a cough or two when he was very small. Just because I didn't know how serious it was. Now he is older, I wouldn't do that unless he was really unwell. But I never found that the doctor minded just checking him over when he was small. Sometimes I would ring NHS Direct too if I thought maybe I was being a bit mad and wasn't ready to call the doctor.

Of course no parent knows what they are doing when they have a small baby (I didn't) but it sounds like you are doing a good job so good luck.

Oh and in terms of practical stuff, I think jilted has given you some good advice.

HV visits us within two weeks of birth. I think if they assess you as needing more help (eg social services) then you see them more. Otherwise there's a three times a week drop in clinic or you can ring them. And you can see the GP too within the day (if you phone at 8am!)

So around here there is help but you have to ask for it.

Thanks guys. V helpful.
I'm gonna look up a drop in clinic :)
I'm taking DS to te doctors today.
I just think something should be done to provide more support for mums. It must be so hard for first time mums especially if they're on their own :(

there should be regular weigh clinics where you can talk to a hv in your area? once i was discharged by the midwives then it was up to me. with my first i went every couple of weeks to get him weighed and have a chat but with my 2nd and 3rd i went much less, but phoned the hv and asked her to come round when i was really struggling.

if you're worried about your baby's health then go to a gp, if you can't then ring nhs direct.
you should also have a birth to 5 book from the midwife/gp that has a check list of when your baby should be seen by a doctor.

for general support i found the nct, children's centre and local baby groups have been brilliant - especially the children's centre.

natural I found the local playgroups and the nct local group great too, they didn't have children's centres when I had DC1.

Weather are there any local groups that you go to? Sometimes you just need to chat to local Mums .

Our local children's centre have run free baby massage courses, healthy cooking and are focusing on mental health at the moment.

Our baby group leader would go round and talk to every single mum during every single session, and she had a library of baby books and a folder of local groups/courses/activities. I really miss that group!

See I didn't get anything from the hospital, I was discharged (kicked out) 2 hrs after having him even though I couldn't walk properly. They didn't do his newborn checks or anything. I dunno maybe I'm old fashioned but I really felt totally pushed aside.
It turn out he has broncholiotis and according to the doctor hell be ok.
Thanks everyone I'm gonna try and get out there a bit more, but I've always been secretly terrified of mother and baby groups.

It does sound like you've had a bad experience at the hospital, they really should do the newborn checks before letting you both go. I'd look into complaining if I were you, then you know you've gone a little way to making the service better for other mothers.

Please don't be shy of mother and baby groups, what you have to try and remember is that it was everyone's first time once and there may even be new people there on the day you go. Have a look at the NCT to see if they run a group near you, then you could always phone them up and ask about the group, the person who runs the group should help to make you feel welcome. Please don't be scared though, it can be very isolating with a new baby and they are a great way to have some adult conversation.