Need help reducing my alcohol intake

[TooMuchBooze]

Im currently drinking three quarters of a bottle of wine every evening. The thought of not drinking panics me slightly. Every morning I wake up feeling slightly jaded and world weary which I know is the booze (mild hangover I guess.) So why can't I cut down? It just seems to be beyond me. It feels like a major support I can't cope without yet I know it makes me grumpy.

Yet its only with wine, would go teetotal rather than bother with spirits etc. (I always make sure I have wine in tho!!) Never drink before 7pm. Don't drink in front of the children either.

So I have some standard/rules/sense yet I still just cannot seem to cut down.

Where do you go if you aren't quite AA level, yet really need some support with it?

I tend to drink half a bottle of wine without thinking in the evening it creeps up gradually find I miss it for the first few days of giving up and then love the feel of feeling better and manage without for a month or so then something happens normally DH being a prat and I am of again on day 2of no drink and have more energy all ready no idea of who would support sorry

Try your GP - a lot of areas have alcohol specialist nurses who the GP could maybe refer you too. Or try just gradually cutting down to healthier levels - not dramatically fast but by half a glass a week say? Then it's less mentally scary and also less likely to send your body into withdrawal.

I'm the same. Maybe get smaller glasses and pour less in to them. I've started doing that. Best of luck x

You need professional help...if you cannot cope without it and it makes you grumpy then you are AA material. It will give you a support system while you try to stop. Alcoholics come in all guises and not just swigging from brown paper bags on street corners, a lot of alcoholics are also middle class professionals and everyday ordinary people who drink a bottle of wine a night while not thinking they have a problem.
Sorry to be harsh, but you probably wont do it on your own as the drink has become a crutch so go to your GP who will do the necessary referrals

Dont' buy it. Just don't have it in the house. & everything that other said.

I'm probably not best placed to advise as I have had to give up alcohol completely (been sober for seven months now). It is only wine that I had a 'thing' about, if that makes sense, I have drunk spirits and beer/cider in the past but would never bother - indeed DH has had spirits in the house whilst I've been recovering and I've never been tempted.

I don't think you're drinking enough to worry about a physical withdrawal problem, although I didn't suffer a withdrawal (somewhat to my GP's astonishment).

My boss is similar to you in that he knows he's drinking more than is healthy but can't find a good way to cut down, even though, as he charmingly points out, he doesn't want to 'end up like me'. In fairness I don't want him - or anyone - to end up like me!

Lots of people do an alcohol-free January, which I think can be a good way to explore the benefits of not drinking - my bro says he always loses about half a stone - but isn't as daunting as giving up all together. One thing you could then use the time for is looking at your triggers. I had a very strong one at first which was: get home from work, first thing I did was pour a glass of wine. Didn't matter if the day was bad or not, it was always the first thing. It's ritual and habit.

The other thing a period off booze might give you is a mood improver. I always thought this was bollocks, even though I knew alcohol is a depressant. I figured my life was so stressful I needed wine to make it okay. Wrong. Overall I have found life a great deal less stressful since I stopped drinking.

The other key thing I think is to make it 'real' by admitting it in real life. I know you don't want to go to AA (I don't go) as you don't want to give up alcohol completely, which is reasonable. But what about going to see your GP? At least he/she could take some blood and refer you as delusions suggests. No-one else needs to know, and your GP can't make you stop drinking; indeed I think he/she will probably try and be supportive for as long as possible (this is the impression I get from my GP although he's never said as much).

So. My feeling is that, like for my boss, cutting down is not for you, rather cutting out and then building slowly back up as and when. BUT that is based on my own experiences as a heavy drinker and I generally try not to evangelise, as nobody needs the 'soberer-than-thou' routine pushed at them against their will.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

Contact your GP and ask about your local PCTs alcohol services. Where I am we provide either brief interventions or individual counselling for someone in your position. Help is available but you usually have to root about a bit to find it.

Hopefully you have a drug and alcohol treatment service - if you look in an nhs website.

It's fantastic you want to start changing, my dh had a twelve week counselling session which really helped get all the reasons for his behaviour out and gave him perspective.

He had rules too, but at stress points he would literally drink everything in view, one of his tricks was to have loads of squash, coke, sprite (choice was important) to distract from the alcohol. He hasn't stopped, but he's drinking reasonably now with a very occasional blip.

Phone up your gp and get an appointment and referral sorted

Thanks (belatedly) for your replies and apologies for being awol. I was a bit nervous about what the replies might say!

I have to say, I am very nervous of talking to the GP about it. Maybe its too much of an admission of the problem its become. I somehow feel it would be a blot on my (hardly impeccable!) health record. I think I should tho. Im finding it impossible to cut down on my own.

Time for a think. Thanks for the reality check everyone!

Just go to AA, they are great and as its anonymous, your gp or hv doesn't need to know.

Do not drink at all Monday to Wednesday and limit yourself to half a bottle on Thursday to Sunday. That way you are drinking two bottles a week - a little over the guidelines but a great improvement on what you are doing at the moment.

Get yourself some nice soft drinks for your non-drinking days and enjoy the feeling of going to bed entirely sober. Don't have wine in the house Monday - Wednesday. If you can just get into the habit of not pouring the first glass you will find it surprisingly easy, honestly.

Distract yourself with keeping busy, clean or watch a film?

We used to drink half a bottle of wine every evening and decided that we would cut back to just having it at the weekend. At first we found this hard we kept making excuses for having a bottle - Stressful day at work, wanting to have wine because there was a good film on TV, working from home the next day etc. It got to the point where we realised enough was enough and we said no more excuses.

We now just indulge at the weekend and feel so much better for it. I don't miss it at all in the week and it makes that Friday glass taste so much nicer!

Hi OP - I got to the stage a few years ago of drinking very heavily (I think mainly to cope with anxiety problems I used to have) - I quit for a year and felt better for it - then started again, but trying to have more control. A few years down the line I occasionally have a beer or a glass of wine (usually at work / social events), but not very often, I don't enjoy it very much and I know I have to be very careful. I have a close family member whose life was saved by AA and went on to run a meeting. There is lots of help out there, AA being one, your local PCT might also have a service that could help. It's nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed of, far from it. If you think you might have a problem (and that doesn't necessarily mean you are a down and out drinking meths or that you will never be able to touch a drop ever again) it is worth having a chat with someone about it. Hope all goes well.

I am coming to the party late, as it were. I suspect that if you want to cut down you will be able to. I also felt I was drinking too much wine. Two years ago, I decided to have three nights 'off' and now drink around a half a bottle of wine, four nights a week, although it is sometimes more than that. To be honest, I would like to cut down to only drinking three nights!

I have found that it helps to put in another thing you can look forward to. For me, I have found that some posh tea with honey and curling up early in bed with a good book or a trashy mag, is something nice to look forward to. If you have really posh tea, it feels like an occasion - try Tea Pigs - REALLY expensive, although obviously cheaper than a bottle of wine! And you can get great flavours. You will feel very pleased with yourself.

Once you start, it really is not as hard as you think it will be - once you get past 'wine witching hour' of 7pm then after a while the urge will go away. Anyway, this is what I do. I know that for some people it is better to cut out all booze. Good luck

Hi mucky - not too late! Yes, thats sort of my plan. But I always crack afer 2 days for some reason, so only doing 2 days off a week. Better than nothing, but it seems to creep up again more eeasily from only 2 days off. You are absolutely right about finding a replacement activity. I hate to admit it, but I get bored evenings. I am tired and often a bit stressy from the day (my own small children still at home, plus I childmind and I do find it fun but demanding!!) I just sort of want to blob, but Im not a telly watcher. I do like reading tho. Could do with another home based brain dead sort of hobby to distract me! Still, its basically up to me. And actually, this thread has made me realise that its habit and laziness that perpetuates my drinking to a great extent.

Perhaps you could try to find a "grown up" and not too sweet soft drink e.g. not lemonade or coke to start the evening with so that it would at least stop you requiring wine as a thirst quencher.

I find sparkling mineral water with a dash of lime quite good for this.

As has been suggested, having 2 or 3 alcohol free days per week might work. Then you've got the weekend to look forward to. Or, failing that, have some night where you only start drinking later - say 10 pm.

These are just one or two things that I have found to work to some extent.