Hysterectomy a step too far right now?

[JiminyCricket]

Hi long term mner, haven't posted for ages, grateful for any thoughts, and sorry if tmi. I have a large fibroid which is causing me the full range of incontinence problems (go about a million times a day, bladder not emptying properly, leaking, often can't go at all first thing in the morning for about half an hour, which is kinda painful, have wet myself quite badly now in various locations - M & S cafe, tesco and a swimming pool change room so now pads all the way). But I don't get bad (any) periods from the fibroid because I have a Mirena in place (but the threads are lost - I wanted to have it out becasue its causing me annoying itching on my arms and legs which is one of its side effects). Stressed and not sleeping well too. Saw a gynae doctor the other day and have gone on waiting list for hysterectomy (sub-total, leaving ovaries and cervix). But now reading about hysterectomy more I think I might be better off just putting up with it? But then some days it all makes me really miserable, other days its kind of just normal. I'm guessing my symptoms would get worse (periods) if I had the coil out. Slightly worried the coil might get expelled, because my last two did and now I'm guessing that was becasue of the fibroid. But I guess I would notice because I did last times. I'm 39, don't want any more babies. Feel kind of stuck.

I'm in banking....the Spanish one! My (male) boss has inferred I'm getting an extra 6 weeks 'holiday' out of this!

I have BIG issues at home & with care....in short, DH & I are separated but live under the same roof. However we do not speak & he will do absolutely nothing to assist around the house. He is rather put out he's going to have to do the school run (which he tutted & huffed about!). Because of this situation it makes having anyone over to help me really awkward because the atmosphere is awful & I'm generally holed up in my own little bedroom to steer clear of him.

I'm having the op done privately (one benefit of having health cover through work!) and I am hoping to be able to get 5 nights in hospital because my poor boys will be my carers when I get home & I don't want to be a total invalid for them- it's not fair on them. I can't really ask anyone else to chip in because of 'him' still being here & making everything so difficult & unwelcoming for visitors.

I have had to book the op to coincide with half term to ensure my boys are about to help out. Fortunately they are quite caring & whilst they will undoubtedly not keep the place tidy, they can get drinks & make me a sandwich etc.

I wondered if more days in hospital would be an option for you - glad you have that in place. Maybe people will want to rally round though, or be a back up if you're having a bad day? Jeez, I'm having a bad day today and i haven't even had it yet.

Jiminy how are things going? Are you still having a crap day? Hope you're ok.

Jiminy, hope your day got better & you are feeling OK.

Have you shopped for your essentials yet? I'm definitely going to get the Peppermint Oil capsules that SS suggested.

I have my pre-op on Wednesday so am making a list of questions.....some seem really silly but I know I'll feel better the more prepared I am.
SS, maybe you can answer- when could you shower? I hate feeling dirty & strip washing is no substitute. Also my boys would like to visit me but I don't want to freak them out- did you have a drain & a catheter? If so, how long did they stay in for?

I had a drip with morphine in (self medicating), a drain in my side and a catheter, all but the drain were taken out the morning after the op, with the drain being removed later on the same day. I would maybe get the boys to come in on your second day when all your drips and drains should definitely be out.

The nurses came first thing the morning after the op and gave me a sponge bath, it really made me feel so much better and once I was up and around I had a shower.

Can I just add I'd also start taking arnica the day before surgery, really helps with reducing the bruising and the swelling - carry on taking it as soon as you're able to eat again.

Thank you Almostfifty and RandomMess

I was thinking maybe 2nd day for the boys to visit. One of them is especially sensitive & squeamish and worried I'm going to die :( I am being as reassuring as I can be with him. I don't want to deny him seeing me if it will help him, but equally I don't want him to panic if I'm not feeling or looking too bright.

Hi - thanks - I am kind of OK now, but I had a minor melt down on Friday - something on the radio started me crying and I didn't stop blubbing until lunchtime. And then on and off for the rest of the day. Its a good look on the school run. I guess I have had a lot on recently, as well as all this. I had a day at home and feel a bit more OK now. Been painting the kitchen most of today (DH making the most of me while I am helpful . I will get the arnica, fab stuff. I am thinking day two for the girls to visit too - they seem fine at the moment but guess it will unsettle them a bit, especially as they are addicted to 'emergency hospital' type programmes at the moment. DD2 will probably just make me about a million sweet hand made cards, and DD1 will try to be all helpful and organised for me and then find it all too much and burst into tears .

Jiminy just popping in to wish you all the best for Friday & for a speedy, uncomplicated recovery.

Will look in again on here once we are both 'done' & on the road to recovery.

By day two, you'll probably be as normal as you can be. With a bit of luck they'll just think you just look as you do when you're in bed.

When you get home, be sensible both of you won't you?

Thank you demo and almost fifty - all packed and ready, feeling OK, I will post when I get home - and if that's not before you go in demo, then all the best. Here goes...

Thank you Almostfifty.

Thinking of you Jiminy. I hope you are early on the list so you don't have that long, nervous wait.

I had a hyster about 6 years ago now ( not fibroids) and had a sling put in for a prolaspe too. Cannot be more positive about how it has given me my life back, to the extent I did two triathlons in the following year. (although couldn't do it now - but thats due to being lazy!)

Good luck ladies, you will not regret it!
xxx

Good luck Jiminy.

I am week 7 post op hysterectomy due to large bulky fibroids.

Listen to your body and rest as much as you can (easier said than done I know).

Second the big knickers and loose stretchy jogging bottoms.

Keep us updated.

babybarrister I have no bleeding at all with mine, but I'm on the mini-pill so that has disguised the usual symptoms. Heavy bleeding is a common symptom though.

watfordmummy if your username is a hint to where you live, we are very close!

We should start a gang I have three external at 20 by 20cms and one internal. I have a massive belly, I feel tired all the time and bleed heavily. Im been told a hysterectomy is the only option at 42. I have no children but, have accepted that. Its still alot to get your head around though.

Another little tip for when you are going home ,place a pillow on your abdomen so the seat belt is not directly on your body. And dont have a dh like mine who drove me down a road that had lots of humps in when you go home !

brightnessfalls I've never heard of external ones, sorry to be thick but where exactly are they?

A hysterectomy was the only option for me in the end.

I was severely anemic and had to have a blood transfusion the day after my op. I'm feeling positive that I can put the last two horrendous years behind me and life is going to be so much better.

Hello...thought I would check in on this thread as I am booked for a hysterectomy on 18th Feb. I'm 40 and have had very heavy periods for quite a few years. All came to a head a few months back when one didn't stop and went on a few weeks.

Was whisked in for scans/endometrial biopsies/camera etc which has revealed an abnormal thickened womb lining, polyps and adenomyosis. Am severely anaemic to due to blood loss as periods are no longer regular and am now bleeding 2/3 weeks out of 4.

Had pre-op assessment yesterday which went well. Will be off work for 8 weeks...I'm a Teaching Assistant so the 6 weeks from op date will take me up to the start of Easter Hols and then obviously the 2 weeks from then. Work have been brilliant and when I spoke to the Head yesterday, she had prepared herself for me to be off for anything up to 12 weeks, so am certainly not feeling any pressure to return too soon.

Good luck to everyone else waiting...and hope you are feeling OK Jiminycricket. Will check in to follow everyone's progress x

Hello Slinky You sound pretty upbeat & about as prepared you can be. Glad your Head is being so supportive too-that makes the world of difference.

I had my pre-op yesterday as well & I'm going in on Wednesday. I have been out today and bought everything that has been suggested so apart from packing I'm done ready.

I hope Jiminy's op went well yesterday- not sure I'll see her on her before I go in.

Thanks to everyone who has shared their experiences- it has helped calm my nerves!

pilates they are the ones that grow outside your uterus and so shouldnt affect fertility, I dont think this is true though and I often wonder if they are the reason I never conceived . One is on the right side and blocked out my ovary so it couldnt be seen on the scan, one is above and right accross, the other is lower left side and a new one is internal.

Can someone tell me if they lost weight, if their stomach went down? there has to be an upside to all of this?

I haven't lost weight - I thought the same as you.

My stomach still has swelling from the hysterectomy. I'm told it can take quite a long time for swelling to completely go down.

good luck demolition.

Hello! Guess what I am home already (at ten this morning, sunday).

I went in at 8 on Friday morning, having been nil by mouth since midnight (well 9pm), and was told my op was third on the list, scheduled for 2.30, but since they didn't have any beds yet, we should anticipate the possibility of being sent home. About one pm I was given a lovely big side room all to myself (just luck I think). One of the ladies before me's op ended up taking a really long time (think she was fine though, as she still went home before me), so I didn't go in until about 5pm. DH waited with me until then, but had to go to get the girls rather than wait for me. Waiting was oK but just got really dehydrated (humungous bags under my eyes).
The anaesthetist and the guy who pushed my bed down to surgery were really sweet (I had felt fine all day and then had a few tears until given the lovely drugs). The nurses were fab, just appeared to give pain meidcation and take my blood pressure really regularly. Had a catheter and a drain thingy in my hand. wasn;t allowed any food until saturday morning but to be honest didn't really want it anyway, just sipped loads of water through the night. Feeling tired (obviously) and a bit of a sore throat (fine now) have been the main after effects, and a swollen windy belly - obviously the scar is tender, but as long as I'm careful and take the pain relief it has not been too bad (
was very sensitive to the bumps on the way home though - I second the advice above about a pillow, which i didn't have with me). Was able to speak to DH and the girls on friday evening, and then had them in to visit on saturday afternoon. Got out of bed on saturday morning for an assisted wash. My surgeon was a man of few words, but he did pop in to tell me that it 'was a nasty old lump, you're better off without it', and that they had done exactly what had been planned (sub-total hysterectomy preserving ovaries and cervix). Going to the loo is already easier than it has been for ages, DH can't believe that I am experiencing the benefits of the surgery already. The heating on the ward broke down for several hours yesterday - bit chilly in all that snow! Glad I took a dressing gown. I have a feeling my energy and patience are going to be in short supply over the next week or so, and hope my belly reduces in size a little soon, but glad to report that everything is going well for me so far.

To those of you that are scheduled for it, I hope it helps to hear how it has gone, and hope you are feeling OK about going in (I know all the info tells you it is normal to feel a bit tearful afterwards, but I was really tearful before, every time someone spoke to me on the school run I was in bits)- I will be thinking of you Demo and Slinky - let us know how you are feeling and how you get on - and thanks for all the support information and advice, I have really appreciated it.

Jiminy! I wasn't expecting to see you so soon! Great to see you back & hear that everything went well. And excellent news that the benefits are already evident.

I hope you get plenty of rest over the coming weeks so you are in full health soon.

At the moment I'm OK....not teary or stressed but want to get it over with. It's my last day at work tomorrow, where I'm sure the lack of sympathy will be oozing from my boss! Tuesday I plan to blitz the house cleaning & changing beds etc as I won't be doing it for a while.....and nor will anyone else!

Take it easy & rest up.