Can't sleep at all

[longingforsomesleep]

So I went to bed at midnight. Lay wide awake until 1.30. Got up and lay on the sofa with book and laptop. Got up at 3.30 and did some work. Tried lying on the sofa again and here I am - 25 to 6 and still wide awake. The problem is this is happening about 3 nights a week. Dh is a snorer but I can usually cope with it. HoweverI just can't at the moment so the only time I've had any sleep for the past month or two is if one of us has slept on the sofa.

When I'm awake I feel like someone has given me a shot of adrenaline. I feel anxious and panicky and like I just have to get up and move around. I'm sure it's connected to the fact that my dad died last month. I was with him a great deal during his final week in hospital and was with him when he died - it was devastating. Last year I discovered that dh had had an affair and for months this had a similar impact on me but at the start of the year we were really starting to put it behind us. We have a very good relationship now.

I'm really starting to feel quite desperate and dread bedtime because, of course, it now becomes a self fulfilling prophecy - I don't expect to sleep so I don't sleep.

Any thoughts on how I can deal with this?

Have you tried Rescue Remedy? I had this sleep problem for a few weeks ago. When I can't sleep I get really frustrated. I stopped drinking caffeine after lunchtime, and if I couldn't sleep, took RR to calm my body and brain down, it seemed to work.

Hi longing. Just sending you some supportive thoughts. I don't often look at this section of MN, but noticed your post. My dad died the week before Christmas last year and the only way I could get to sleep (and this is not very good I know) was by bfing my baby daughter, who was 6 months old at the time - I think the sleepy hormones helped. I would be pretty sure that your current sleeplessness is connected with your dad's death - I am so sorry for your loss. Do you have anyone you can talk to about it? Sounds like your DH might be supportive. Losing a parent is devastating, and I can only imagine what you went through with your dad at the hospital, and am sure you were a great support, but these things do catch up with you - and in different ways and at unexpected times. Sorry I've got no great tips for sleeplessness - other than giving yourself lots of tlc and asking for it from others - good luck. Also, if you felt like it, I'm wondering if there's a bereavement service you can access either through your local voluntary sector or via the GP. A friend of mine who does bereavement counselling recommended the Cruse website to me and I recall finding it helpful.