Smear test phobia - WTF am I going to do?

[Petrifiedforest]

Yes, yes, yes, everybody hates them. But I am way past that - I am literally phobic about them and find them hideously painful. I cry throughout every one and they're always really difficult. I know all that gubbins about 'just relax, don't tense, put your hands under your bum' etc, - all of it making no difference whatsoever. 'Just relax' is for people who are nervous, not people who are phobic. Anyway, have just found out that next one is due at end of Jan and have been having panic attacks since I found out. I was actually sick this morning from the thought of it. Can't stop crying, have taken 2 valium on several occasions and even that doesn't stop me panickning. I've had 2 c-sections and would honestly rather go through a C-section and it's associated recovery than have a smear test.

GP has said I can have one early (can't stand the panic if I waint until it's due at end of Jan!) but I can't get in until Monday evening at the earliest.

WTF am I going to do until then? I'm in tears just typing this post. Feel barely able to look after mself with the panic, let alone the DCs.

Anyone had one privately under sedation? Is that even possible?

I was going to suggest asking your GP for valium, but see that they don't stop you panicking. Did your GP suggest anything else you could take before the smear? Well done for trying to find a way to deal with it rather than just ignoring it though.

I think you need to have a proper talk to someone about this. Have you always been frightened of them or has someone made you frightened?

Have always been frightened but also had very painful experiences before, which doesn't help. I hadn't thought of asking for anything else as I thought Valim would be the only thing. I did think I'd ask what the maximum possible dosage I could take if someone else drives me though.

I think you should go back to the GP and ask what they can do to help you to be able to have the smear test, without meaning to sound patronising, it is great that you are facing up to it and not just ignoring the reminder.

Talk to the GP about your fear.
I was in your situation many years ago and got prescribed temazepam and the lovely GP said she'd do it herself and arranged a half-hour appt to try. No idea if temazepam is better/worse than valium, but you're being very brave facing the problem. Good luck.

It's really good you are trying to face up to your phobia op, and not avoiding it like so many of us do.

You need to speak to your gp again. If he/she is happy to prescribe you something, it may be worth asking about Lorazepam. It is quicker acting than diazepam and can be very effective for anxiety as a short term measure. It is addictive, like diazepam though.

Thanks everyone. I'm actually on some Lorazepam at the moment, just from thinking about it!

There is a place half an hour's drive away that might be able to do to tonight but I really ought to have DH drive me (cos of lorazepam) but DD is ill, so not fair to drag her out in the car all that way :(

The GP could refer you to colposcopy; the staff there are used to seeing women who are anxious and have a lot of experience with trying different ways when they are uncomfortable, painful etc.

Well, after a very traumatic few hours, I've DONE IT!!! I was in tears the entire time but it really wasn't as bad as last time (it hurt but wasn't agony like before) I went to a new place and they were lovely.

I suddenly found out they could see me tonight and it was either now or never. She had to do it twice which wasn't much fun but fingers crossed that this is it for another 3 years now.

Thanks, everyone!

well done -v and sleep well tonight x

well done - hope you can relax now

Congratulations! Glad they were lovely to you.

thank you! But Bela, could you swap that for a ? :)

Feel quite shocked and still very shaky and panicy but am hoping that I'll wake up calm tomorrow :)

Thanks for the referral suggestion, Bela, but I decided that the panic was worse than the actual pain so I just wanted it done ASAP, wherever, as couldn't bear the panic. The receptionist kept offering me biscuits and ran up to give me a cuddle when it was all over :)

Well done PF. I am a bit late to the party here but just wanted to say that after years of painful smears, I had my last one done at a family planning clinic instead of at the GP. When I said how painful it was usually the doc examined me gently first, told me I had a v long vagina and needed a long speculum. She found one, used it and it was the first ever pain free smear I have had. Just a thought for next time!

Well done, that's great