Getting nervous, counting the days until I have preventative breast surgery.

[tiredteddy]

less than a week now until I have a double mastectomy and reconstruction. I feel really nervous about the anaesthetic as I have never had one before. I am worried how my boys will cope with me away. I am nervous about my recovery and what I will feel like and be able to do. Has anyone had this operation who could advise me or reassure me. Thanks for reading!

Sorry to hear that you're going through this. I'm not qualified to help you but the lovely lovely ladies on the tamoxifen thread will be able to. Search tamoxifen 14.

Thanks for your reply philmassive, I will search for that thread.

I've had two mastectomies - one for BC last year, now one preventative, less than 3 weeks ago). I've had implants as reconstruction for both sides. Feel free to ask me anything. You really will be okay though. I'm pretty good now. Bit sore, but honestly much okay again.

Thanks for replying smee.
I just feel nervous really about the op as I have never had anything done to me in my life before. I am definitely anxious and am finding myself increasingly snappy with my children when all I really want to do is enjoy half term with them. I am not sure how long exactly my recovery will take as I am having implant with strattice recon. It is a shorter operation and the dr says shorter recovery and that I should be fine by Christmas. I guess I am just wondering about what it is like in the early days? What you felt like? What you could do?

YOU WILL BE FINE. Honestly, just let the anaesthetic drift you off to sleep and you'd be amazed how little pain you'll be in when you wake.

That lattice op is supposed to be amazing and get good results. My surgeon told me she's not allowed to do it, as it's too expensive.

Few things you might already know, but here goes:

• You'll wake with tubes coming from the wound site, which are basically to remove excess fluid. They're a bit yuk and annoying as they get in the way. Think transparent sports bottle and long tubing and that's what they'll be like. Take a bag to carry them - something which slings over your shoulders and has an opening at waist height. That way you can hide it all under your pj's.

• Drains stay in for anything from 2 days to 12. That's the max my surgeon let them stay. It's fantastic when they come out. I was only in hospital overnight, though I think that's unusual.

• Take button up pjs to hospital as that's the easiest thing to unbutton so they can check the wound. Hard to pull anything up over your head for a while, so make sure you've got a few things for home that button up too.

• Pain wise it's honestly not too bad and they'll give you strong pain killers to take anyway. You'll be sore for a couple of weeks and the worst thing is if you pull the stitches under the breast, as that feels like you're ripping, so really does hurt. You soon get used to working out what you can and can't do though, so can avoid that.

• biggest nuisance is it's hard to sleep afterwards, as you have to lie on your back really until the drains have gone and any swelling has calmed down. I've found propping myself semi-upright is most comfortable.

• I only had one done this time (though had implant on other side removed and replaced too) and was walking DS half a mile to school and back after 5 days. I felt very wiped out, but that was mostly the anaesthetic.

• I had my op 2.5 weeks ago and am managing half term pretty well so far. I still feel sore (feels a bit like when your breasts are engorged during pregnancy, though worse!), but it's not too bad. I stopped taking pain killers well over a week ago, just a few paracetemol to ease it from time to time.

• You will feel wiped out and maybe quite depressed too. Apparently it's common to have the op and build yourself for that, then afterwards you can feel quite low.

• Not sure how old your children are, but my son's 7 and he's been fine, but hated the drains. I've been very matter of fact about it, so just explained basic truths. Seemed to work well and he hasn't really noticed very much.

hope something amidst that helps. Ask me anything and I'll try and think. When are you going in?? Will keep everything crossed for you xx

Yes that does all help thank you so much. My sons are 7 and 4. I will talk to them about the drains then so they know what to expect. I go in on Monday 31st oct so just a few days to go now. The hint about the bag is brilliant. I have plenty of front opening stuff, pyjamas and tops for afterwards. It's good to hear that you can manage so much. Thank you for your honest answers. I will be fine!

You really will be fine. Sod that you have to do it, but think how you'd feel if you backed out and then cancer appeared. That's what got me through. Will be thinking of you on Monday. Come back here if you want to ask anything, or PM me. xx

So it's Tuesday and I am alive! Worries abated, sore and tired but doing okay. Thanks for your support smee!

Well done tired teddy,you've done it!

like you I have bad family history but when they tested my mum she was negative for bcr1 and 2.The genetics team said they are sure its a gene but not one thats been discovered yet so I can't be tested.But if I'd had a positive result like you,I'd have done the risk reducing surgery.In fact,since having some problems ,I've been wondering if I should do it anyway.

So keep us informed on how your recovery goes,fingers crossed for an easy ride for you.Have been thinking of you since you posted and wishing you well.

I'm sure smee will be along soon to check on you.
take care.

Thanks for your reply 14K I am ok. Not sleeping too well as I don't naturally sleep on my back. Also morphine is making me very nauseous. Not so tearful today. Will update again later when I have seen the very clever man who gave me my new boobs!

yes please do,when do you get your first look?
How long are you expecting to be in for?

I hate morphine because it makes me sick and itchy.Had it after 2 c sections and stopped it asap.They gave me other painkillers by mouth and it wasn't bad.Nausea is bloody horrible,I feel for you.

I'll come back later to see how you're feeling.

Hi,i had bc at 27 and had lumpectomy chemo etc.After 2 years still felt scared so had them both off anf had reconstruction at the same time.
It was scary as i went down to theatre cos it felt as if it was unecessary and i didnt have to put myself thru it.

Afterwards it was painfull yes but not unbearable,its obviously hard to move for a few days but i was up and walking to the loo the next day.
I had a patient administered pain relief machine,but the morphine made me very sick and that was worse than the op tbh.

At the time i had 3 boys 8,6 and 3 and was able to cope fairly well when i came home.They were curious so i showed them as soon as the bruising had gone down.Didnt do a load of housework but could help get l;ittle one dressed etc or prepare a light meal.

The difference though is incomparable.I went from being fearfull and depressed to confident and relieved.My friend who was with me siad she could see the light go back on in my eyes.

My boobs look really good,the one that had previously had cancer is abit scarred and hard but the other one is perfect and i could go topless if they were both like that.

I have been divorced and remarried since and also had two more babies which i wouldnt have risked if id not had the op.

Good luck,you are having it done so just go with the flow and let it happen,it will hurt but not for long and will be so worth it.

Happy for you to pm me if you need to xx

Oh sorry teddy you've done it! Wow well done. You will be on your side soon and once you start to heal it is quick.

I had the saline implants which they top up later week by week,it was very funny watching them grow before my eyes.

Well done.

Ooh teddy, well done. Had been thinking of you - brilliant to hear you're through and the only way is better now. Hope you're not still feeling sick. Drugs always do that to me too, but it soon goes. How are you coping with the drains and more importantly when are you going to get home??

I can't have morphine and they gave me oxycodone instead for my recent major surgery and it was fantastic.

Well done for getting through it!

and they should also be giving you an anti-emetic to stop the nausea. Mine were little strawberry flavoured ones.

I had lots of anti sickness drugs now and they took away the morphine at lunchtime now on other tablets for pain relief much better and not feeling so sick. Apparently everything looks healthy, hard to move thouh that is to be expected. I think they are aiming for drains out on third and home on Friday at the moment. they are being very careful though to monitor how the strattice takes to be sure as it is quite new thing to use. Feel very tired and emotional. Glad to see my devoted hubby every night, sure I have done the right thing in the long run. Thanks for reading and checking up on me everyone xx

You definately have done the right thing-im still here look of course you are emotional but i think its more to do with the surgery rather than the boobs tbh.

Its interesting about the sickness cos i always assumed it was from the morphine but when i went onto have my sections they gave it me with no sickness.
I was sick for 5 days after my mastectomy,i didnt really respond to the anti emetics.

Its only uphill from now Teddy x

Thanks again ledkr! I am a bit nervous about seeing my new boobs. Have got saline so will be adjusted over time. They look pretty good through the dressing and bra, just nervous about seeing the stitches and scars I think. You get used to how you look don't you. Thanks for your support it's brilliant. X

Friday home sounds good and you'll feel loads better day by day am sure. Be a bit weird if you weren't feeling a bit weepy, as even without all the drugs, what you've done is huge. I'm sure you've done the right thing. You're incredible for being so strong and as ledkr says it's all good from now on. Hope you like the new breasts. Don't worry if they're a bit unneven. The saline will round them as it goes in.

lovely to hear you sounding better already

Mine looked like flat small boobs with lots of bruises after surgery.
The saline going in makes all the difference and doesnt hurt at all.At one point i was a bit too big and had jordan esque under the chin boobs so they removed some-spoil sports.

Another advantage is dont need to wear a bra.I do but if want to go with out i can.

I wore a backless top to a friends party when i was 41,all the women were asking me how i could go bra less

Hope you are feeling better today.I had to turn the car around 6 days after cos my stupid friend couldnt

Well they don't look too small at all! One drain came out today, hopefully the next one tomorrow. Doing okay, things seem harder in the morning I think where the drugs where off overnight a bit. Watched a film in bed today which felt very grown up without interruptions.

Good for you,the drains feel weird when they come out dont they? I actually found the drain sites felt sore longer than the breast ones.

How lovely that its all over and your all comfy in bed watching movies.

Im sure my life would have been so worrying had i not had it done,complete relief.

Mornings are worse cos you've been led still for so long.

Now stick another film on.

Watching films and drains going sounds good and you're maybe home tomorrow too? Hope you get rid of the other drain. Be far easier at home if you haven't got that to lug around.