Why won't GP admit my mum to hospital?

[DukesOfTripHazard]

She is vomitting green bile today and has eaten/drunk very little for days and felt nauseous for weeks. She has a churning stomach that is very tender and painful and she's extremely weak and shaky with chattering teeth even though she doesn't feel cold. She's 81.

Last Thursday when she slightly less unwell than this, but was feeling desperate, we took her to A&E where they did various tests, which came back normal but because of 'slow movement of stomach gases' seen on an xray, they kept her in overnight. They discharged her the next day with a letter for her GP to request a colonoscopy.

Since then she has deteriated to the point where she can't keep food down and (please re-read first sentence at this point - Mobius loop of old age, perhaps!).

My sister called the GP out today and said she and mum were at end of their tethers and whatever is wrong with mum's stomach needed to be looked into with her as an in patient as she is getting very weak. GP was eventually persuaded and told my sister to collect a letter from the surgery this afternoon. BUT GP has just called to say he won't admit her, but will come round tonight at 8 with an anti nausea injection and discuss things then.

We feel that he is not doing enough. Any medics have an opinion on this?

:(

what a palaver.

I hope that she's going to get the proper care she needs now. :(

Dukes What a mare.

Will you / your sis be able to get back to the hospital to keep an eye today?

Hope things get better today ((hugs for u all)).

That sounds awful. I hope that things get better today for her.

Omg... And work in a hospital.
Sounds like there was no room at the inn, and at London I would expect there to be more beds.
But that does not excuse what went on! I think you have solid grounds for a compliant.

Lw

Spoken to staff nurse. Her blood pressure is over 200. Imagine if she had been sent home

Thanks for all the support. It helps.

This sounds like a situation where a complaint could be helpful to the staff in the unit too. It sounds like they are terribly overstretched.

Oh Dukes, what a nightmare.

Thank goodness your sister was assertive enough to get something done.

Let us know how things go today.

Dukes, I'm so sorry, I've just seen this thread. Your poor mum and poor you and your sis. I hope she is more comfortable today. My only piece of advice is to keep asking the staff what is going, politely, adorably, but firmly, so they know you are not going to go away. And when you do get somewhere, be really vocally grateful to whoever helped you. IME of these things, being a polite squeaky wheel works best in overstretched hospitals.

How is she tolerating the antibiotics, if she's on them? Worth getting some good quality probiotics for her, if you can, they do really help if the ABs wipe you out.

Dukes this brings back terrible memories of what i went through with both is is my mum and dad. This is Britain 2011. Omg its terrifying. I had to fight fight fight every step of the way for my parents, especially my dad last year. It was shocking. The stand up rows i had were a sight to behold and that is if i could get anyone who could understand English well enough. Your poor poor mum i know where you are coming from and i hope her dignity remains because if my story is anything to go by.......good luck Dukes and i send a hug to you and yours.

She is so lucky to have you and your sister fighting her corner for her (not for being so ill)

Just spent the weekend in a 4 bed NHS hospital and seen the best 1 to 1 nursing of a confused elderly lady with a full bladder during the night shift and the worst neglect of the same lady the next day. Her family popped in for less than half an hour of the time I was there.

The underfunding is cutting staff levels, only those who shout the loudest and longest get what they need it seems and if they or their family can't the patient suffers.

You know what is best for your mum, dont be afraid to keep asking and pushing

Yes, polite squeaky wheel is absolutely it Wilbur. Sis is squeak central and I'm quite assertive and also my mum is charming and interested in staff and remembering names when she's up to it so we are playing the game.

Chipsticks sounds like you have had an awful time of it. We will ask and push away eaglewings. So interesting what you say about the lady's care. It's moment by moment, intervention by intervention sometimes, it seems. Can't believe how much we had to fight to get her in. GP was alright last night really. I just think he should have acted sooner. She's been in hospital half a dozen times in last few years but it has always gone much better, more efficiently. I suppose it is cuts. You live and learn. Asking and pushing from now on. About to eat then go and visit now DH is back.

How awful.

Hope your mum is getting the treatment she needs.

What caused the retention-do you know?

how dreadful .
FWIW after similar nightmare A&E experience I try very hard to avoid it at peak times ,especially night .
Your experience has strengthened my resolve to continue with this approach .
( am talking elderly frail people )

So sad. :(

And only likely to worsen as the population ages.

I hope your mum starts to respond to treatment soon Dukes.

Thinking of you. xx

Yes gingeroots, night time not great idea. Was speaking with friend who works with CAMS it's that pressure for throughput that results in 'treat the most acute symptom and send on their way'. So in the case of this hosp with it's dubious 'trauma centre' accolade which means they can't say 'too busy. Send to another hosp that isn't bursting at the seams' what has happened, in this case, anyway is that the treatment would have been inadequate. If my sister had tried to take her home in a cab, as suggested, rather than ask for an ambulance and that Paramedic had kicked arse to have her admitted.

Anyway. She was past exhausted last night not having slept for two nights. The nurses seem very good and we made friends with them. Hopefully she will have got a good sleep and be able to cope a bit better today. We have decided to tell anyone dealing with her 'She was driving herself to Sainsbury's 3 weeks ago and regularly completes the big crossword in the Guardian' so that they see what is normal for her and where she should get back to.

Thanks whomoved and didl for thoughts.

I work on an emergency ambulance at times and the situation you describe of waiting at a&e for a bed is not unusual. Ambulances are used as overflow beds when there none left in the dept. Was working last week and picked someone p, went to a&e and joined the queue of ambulances. We were there three hours before handing our patient over.
There were four other ambulances there for similar times. So eight paramedics/ technicians getting paid for sitting about drinking tea. And of course it impacts on numbers of available ambulances.

Hope your mum improves soon.

Viva that's pretty grim.

How are you coping? Hope your mum is soon driving herself to much nicer places than the supermarket again

Dukes - one of the things I did when my dad was in hosp was take in a framed picture of him looking fit and tanned with his 2 (at the time) grandchildren and put it on his bedside so that people could see him in a non-hosp environment, not just a frail old man. The nurses and orderlies all noticed the pic and asked about it.

very good idea to remind staff of your mothers normal healthy state
it is all too easy for staff to assume someone that age is listless and confused
and ignore serious symptoms

She is being cared for very well. BP still high and finding it hard to swallow, so food not going in and medicine coming back out. No-one talking yet about what might be wrong but tests due back. No-one talking about discharge either which is a relief! Especially for sis who lives on top 2 floors of same house as mum.

Good idea re pic Wilbur. She has excitable cards full of pics and 'why did the nurse tiptoe pass the medicine cupboard? So she didn't wake the sleeping pills' from dds 7 and 10.

That's good news Dukes. Fingers crosssed they get to the bottom of it asap.