Genital Herpes

[droopyxmastree]

My dh has it and swears blind it is not sexually transmitted. (Bless him) he says he had his first outbreak when he was 21 and with a gf for a year. He said he never strayed so it can't be. (a little naiive I think as his gf probably gave it to him and kept quiet!)

Just being nosey as it's a bit of a non issue as we have finished having kids now but is it DEFINITELY always a STI ?

As far as I know. But why do you think it's not an issue? If you're having sex with him then you're at risk

Is is extremely common and can occasionally be transmitted in a non sexual way but it is an sti and is isn't always protected by condoms (if outbreak is somewhere not covered by condom iyswim. If he hasn't had a breakout in ages then you will hopefully be okay but if he ever gets the warning tingle (like with coldsores) you need to abstain from sec til it's cleared up.

Sec!? Sex!

You are at risk before symptoms show. Google viral shedding.

You really need to see your gp and get up to date advice, you do realise how painful it can be?

It is not a non issue.

Well, it is highly unlikely to have been transmitted through non-sexual contact, or via fingers, but if his girlfriend got coldsores on her lips (which, I think we are all agreed, can easily be acquired through non-sexual means from babyhood onwards...) and then gave him oral sex, then she could actually have passed that strain of the herpes virus to his genital area, even if she was a virgin prior to meeting him and even though that strain of the virus mainly afflicts a less embarrassing part of the body. It is also possible to get the genital strain of the virus around the mouth.... The only way to be certain which strain - the mainly genital type or the mouth type - you have is to have a blood test, although you tend to get more severe symptoms if the right strain of the virus hit the right spot...

When your dh claims it was not sexually transmitted, he may be raging at the notion that he or his girlfriend of the time were in any way sexually promiscuous, unfaithful or lax in their contraceptive choices (although, for example, unprotected oral sex is actually a very risky activity). In other words, it doesn't feel to him like it ought to be described as sexually transmitted, because in his mind you only get "that sort of thing" if you or your partner sleep around (unfortunately often not the case).

ps it is thought that people who have genital herpes infection are more likely to get abnormal cervical cell changes as a result of HPV infection if they are also infected with HPV (ie abnormal smears), so for that reason as well as the fact that herpes infection can be pretty painful (albeit some people are never even aware they've got it, despite being able to pass it on to others), it is worth trying to avoid it if possible.

The above info is all true.

GH is an STI. it is likely his first GF gave it to him BUT you can get it without having intercourse; using condoms does not prevent it, it's acquired through skin to skin contact. This means that any bare skin touching can transfer it.

Has he had recent outbreaks? How does he know he has it if he was 21?
Most people get recurring attacks that are less severe as time goes on.

People who have the virus in their bodies- it is always there- forever- shed the virus roughly twice a year through their skin. They don't know when this will happen.

1:4 people has the virus. 80% do not know and have no symptoms. it islikely that you have it already but your immune system is overriding it.

You may get an attack if you get really low and run down.
if you do, go to the drs or STI clinic as anti-virals can reduce the attack.

Meanwhile your Dh needs to wise-up- and if he has any tingling etc or any signs of it- seek help.