chronically ill parents with small children

[marykat2004]

Hello. My DH has a heart condition. He spends most of his time in bed, especially the hours between the end of school day and DD's bedtime. I would guess he has 5-10 years left. I feel like this is an awful situation for a child. She is 6 years old. He dad is always sleeping and she has to be quiet when she comes home from school. I feel tired of looking after him. I feel like it would be easier to be a single parent, just with a child to look after. But what is better for her? A sick dad or no dad? I want to get him into a care home but I think he may too young. He is only 49.

This is totally the wrong place to post this but I don't know where to start.

Does any one else have a very ill SO? How do you cope? Am I just the wrong kind of person for this? That I can't just devote my life to being a proper carer. I am 44.

I don't have personal experience of this, but have you looked at respite care?
How does she feel about him/the situation?
Could he manage to slightly alter his day so he has usually some time awake with her, even if it's only 15 minutes for her to tell him about the day, read a book to him or (perhaps only on a good day) play a brief game. Even if all they can do is watch a TV program together I'd have thought it was beneficial for both of them.

try to get him to alter his sleep pattern so he is awake when DD gets hoime from school,does he need caring or can he see to his own needs when awake(toileting,bathing etc),Maybe you should speak to your doctor and see if you could get some help fromCNs or some respite care.British heart foundation my help too.