health anx really bad

[choclab]

posting as suffer with HA , seems to be so bad at moment with many things on my mind ..

ways to cope please other that going to doctor again...

I really understand just how debilitating this can be as I suffer myself, plus it's a very misunderstood condition!

I got a specific book on Living with Health Anxiety from amazon which was my starting point. It gets you to rationally think about symptoms and assign values to other likely causes rather than something terminal!
It also helps you to understand how other HA behaviours can make your symtoms seem worse.

I have also set myself some strict rules;

Firstly if I get a symptom I must firmly remind myself that I suffer from health anxiety disorder.

Secondly I must never google EVER, even if I think it is to reassure myself, it won't it will only make me worry more.

Thirdly I must NEVER self examine at night ie, prodding to feel lumps etc, looking at spots; things always look brighter in the mornings.

Also I remind myself of all the imaginery cancers I've had over the last few years that helps to remind me I had HA and this is likely to be HA rather than cancer!

Finally rather than killing myself with worry, see a doctor and this usually puts things quickly back in perspective

Hope this helps!

Many thanks pip ..

sounds very familiar ...

got a few things going on ...worried sick trying to put in perspective ....

i got lots of book i can go a while bit better , i even think im cured then something is triggered , something on TV in a magazine ..or someone telling me a sad story about a friend of a friend ...then im off ...self checking ..bla bla bla ..you know the drill ...

trying to put off going to doctors as , went last week , there all sick of me ...can tell ...but to be honest i came out worse than went in ..
considering paying for health check to get FBC , all sorts of tests just to be sure ...but going to cost around 300 to do it ..

bad day today as i said ...

thanks for listening ..

HA is really a horrible condition choclab it really sucks all the fun out of life as you just keep worrying about death!

I find my symptoms do seem to improve if I immerse myself in something else much more interesting.

£300 is a lot to spend for reassurance, my poor dad funded a £400 consultant ENT appointment for me when I convinced myself I had nose cancer postnatally, I still feel guilty about this.

Perhaps private CBT might be an option ínstead but I do understand that when you are worried that reassurance is priceless!

I go through periods when I think i'm on top of my HA only to get something new crop up so I can totally relate to having bad days!

I am in the unfortunate position when I work on a acute medical ward so see lots of different new nasty things to die from on a daily basis, at points I've thought I need to change my job. I will never watch casulty or read depressing magazines as I instantly will start to worry.

I really hope you start to feel better

thanks again.

gosh how do you do that job , take my hat off to you ...i really do ..

i never watch those programs either ..or magazines ..or if someone starts a conversation and i can tell its going to be health and bad ..i tell them to stop i cant here it ...

hopefully i will pick up again in the next day or so ...

i tried private CBT so expensive just couldnt afford to carry it on ...i also had been having a good patch ...so cant justify it when i think im cured ....
but here i am again .....

iv booked an appt with doctors ...for 2 weeks time if im still worried i will have to go..only way to get reassurance and move on ...
not the answer i know .....so hard though ...

cant see woods for the trees ... if you know what i mean ..

I completely understand how you feel. I have recently suffered with a really bad bout of HA. Mine seems to have got uncontrollable since my father's death from cancer.
I have just started counselling with CBT and I am really hoping it will help as HA is taking over my life.
Maybe you could spend the £300 on getting help with your HA?
I think avoiding the triggers like other people have said such as Google and health scares in magazines. Although its hard to avoid real life around you.
I think its hard for people who don't suffer with this to know how awful it can be.
I would maybe take another trip to a sympathetic GP it might help to settle your current worry?
Good luck

sorry xposted

thanks , alphabill

so sorry for your loss of your Dad ....

i lost my mum 6 months ago

will just have to see how i go .

good luck you to .

I also suffer from this and have done for 9 years now but luckily it comes and goes. I saw a therapist for years and am seeing her again as it seems to be at it's worst in the winter months. There is a good book on amazon called Overcoming Health Anxiety by David Veale which is helpful as there are lots of CBT exercises for you to do yourself.

My tips are:-

DON'T GOOGLE - it never makes you feel better and not all the information on the net is correct

Try and keep yourself busy. If you get bad thoughts stop yourself - try the rubberband on your wrist that you flick when you get a bad thought.

Reassurance is not helpful really. A good doctor will try and get you help so be honest with them about your feelings. Are you depressed at all? Would medication help? I don't do medication myself but know it works well for many.

The best thing I did was to look at where I was unhappy in my life and make changes there. More socialising with friends, getting a job I enjoyed etc etc. Made a big difference. Also getting lots of exercise is a great way to lift your mood and being healthy and looking after yourself makes you feel much better.

Remember chances are you are not sick. It is very very easy to pay too much attention to your body.

What is it that is worrying you at the moment? What do you believe is wrong?

I also found talking to other mothers that this is not uncommon although some are more prone than others - generally people who are worriers in general. Of all the many, many people I have spoken to who have this problem none of them were actually sick.

Did losing your mother trigger this? It would make sense as when we lose our parents we feel like we are 'next' but most of us will life a long life.

There are some forums on this which I can direct you to if you think it would help and not make things worse :)

Oh and in the 9 years I have had this I believed I had:-

HIV
Throat Cancer
Oral Cancer
Bowel Cancer
Breast Cancer
Motor Neurone Disease
Dementia

So far I have been wrong everytime.

thanks nikki978

sounds like me ...

will try elastic band on wrist ....

i go to gym all the time , plus running club, that really has helped ..today i couldnt go was working ...plus i ran hard last night and have pain in back of leg , behind knee , been there for some time comes and goes ...but worse last night ...
so worried now maybe something bad .....

went to doctors about it last month who said was just muscle strain ...

other things at mo are ,

moles , C ...
am very freckly moley , so i go to skin clinic , every 6 months (for own peice of mind ) went November last year all was scanned and fine ...worried as saw bit in paper on SC so now worried i may have it ...due to go agin in may for 6 month check , considering bringing forward for peice of mind again ...

also lump in arm pit /went last week to doctors , saw locome doctor , man , said was fine and normal , but yes i still worried ..

thats it ...

yes the loss of my mum im finding very hard to deal with and poss making my anx worse and i miss her so much and would normally talk to her about this to , and like a mum she would say i was alright and not to worry ...
miss her so much ..

thanks for listening to me going on ..

Hi, I suffer from HA which came on really bad after I had my second child. My mum died when I was 15 from cancer, it was 9 days from diagnosis to death.

I have been on anti-d's for a few years and had lots of CBT/counselling which I am very lucky my private health care pays for. Having private healthcare can be a god send if you have HA but it can also be a noose around your neck as you can almost demand MRI's etc.

I keep a list of the things I've had over the years, what the symptoms were and what it eventually (if anything) it turned out to be.

I've had:

bladder cancer
arm (?!) cancer
ovarian/womb cancer
breast cancer
brain tumours
DVT (every time I step on a plane)
leukeamia (sp?)
lymphatic cancer
skin cancer
bowel cancer
liver cancer
gall stones
bone cancer
MS

current faves are brain tumours and leukeamia

CBT and drugs are the way forward. I have just come off my drugs in the last 10 days so we will see how it goes. Usually by now I'm needing to take them again but feel ok now, interestingly I had my mirena coil removed 9 months ago and I've suddenly got my libido back too (which is s shame as DH is away in USA for 2 weeks!!)

Good luck, I know how utterly AWFUL HA is, that terrible adrenalin hot/cold feeling you get when you realise you have got a terminal illness (again...)

Take care, big un-mn HUG :-)

Oh and how could I have forgotten my several heart attacks leading to emergency dashes to A&E and also several ectopic pregnancies! Madness I know.

Are you poking that poor lymph node again, choclab? Eh?

Maybe you should try CBT again?

Intermittent pain behind the knee- you go the gym and run-logical explanation is the muscle strain plus the doctor had a feel around, I would imagine?

The node is a node is a node- doctor said it's fine and I poked myself for you last time, too...yes, we all have one biggish node deep in the armpit.

Moles-you go every six months. What else can you do? If there aren't any new moles/weird changes, there's nothing to worry about.

Deffo sign up for more therapy. You know it's HA. Use your money and energy to tackle it, don't spend it on countless and needless doctor's visits.

choclab don't be to hard on yourself. You have just lost your Mum who you were obviously very close to. The grief is immense and its still early days. I think that the grief is making the HA worse, or your current anxiety is related to grief. Try and keep your Mums voice in your head and imagine what she would say to you about your current health worries.
That feeling of missing your parent is dreadful and I still miss my dad 4 years on, it gets easier to bear but I will never stop missing him even if I lived to 100. I also used to talk to him about my worries and I used to find his words quite reassuring.
See how you go but a kind GP that you could talk to about all these issues might be helpful.
Be kind to yourself!

Thanks all ,

winnybella - yes having another wobble ..

alpha- i have asked doctor to reffur me for grief consoling as i am not coping with coming to terms with the loss of my mum ..
gosh i cry just saying that ...and thinking about it all ...

i miss her soooooo much and so sad as im discovering things surrounding mum passing and its complicated ...

forgive my spelling im so rubbish at it ...

thanks again x

off kids to school then work ...

Sorry to hear you are struggling choclab. It all sounds so exhausting, i really feel for you.

I have HA too but it is not as severe as yours. I look at it ike this - there is nothing i can do if i am going to get sick so i am not going to ruin my life worrying about it. Worrying changes nothing just makes you miserable. If i feel a lump or have something serious that i can actually see or feel i go to the doctor. I don't check for these things anymore (apart from the normal breast checking etc)

I have these thoughts that i have ME or MS, leukemia, cancer, gum disease, cervical cancer (my fave at the moment seeing as i seem to be the only 25 year old i know that hasn't been sent a letter to get a smear ) etc etc....it is just in the background and doesn't affect me day to day as i know it is HA.

I would definately go to the GP and get referred for CBT. Ive just had CBT for my severe panic disorder/agoraphobia and i am a completely new person!!! I can do anything i want now. Amazing. Please go, it is worth it :)

Good luck and have a hug from me x

Glad I found this thread. I'm not alone!

My father, mother and sister died from different cancers. Someone very kindly said to me "So for you it's not if, it's when" - so I am constantly fearful now.

I can't read any magazine or health section of paper. I've even stopped buying anything for myself because I feel it's tempting fate and I won't get any long-term use out of it. I have thought about going for a full body scan. Would that put my mind at rest, do you think?

still a bit worried today ...moles today , no change in any i dont think just reading about them in a magazine ..made me double check mine ...

had full body scanned last year NOV all ok , none at mo got bigger {hmm] dont think ...or sore itchy , red, etc ...

god i hate this ..