Still homesick after 5 years

[nomadwantshome]

Wasn't sure where to post this. Moved up north 5 years ago and still homesick. We moved originally to start a business but that wen bust 2years ago. It was all fairly traumatic. Since then we both got jobs locally which was no mean feat at the time as the recession was kicking in. We we renting and deciding on our next move. Iwas hoping to move southwards but dp talked me out of it, you know we have to keep our jobs, which of course I understand.

Since then we recently bought a house but I keep coming back to the homesick thing. It's becoming really troubling now. I keep having dreams that obviously relate to these issues. My dd is nearly 7 and ds. Is 5 and have just started in a new school. Added to that dp is bipolar so wants stability. I feel trapped now and I don,t know how to get over it.

could you maybe manage to go back for visits maybe a long weekend or so every now and again so you dont miss folk so badly and they could visit you in between.

I visit every so often but visiting is different to actually living. I just don,t feel settled at all

Are you missing the location of family and friends?
Have you made any effort to get involved in your new community?

I did the reverse move 30 years back. I was lucky in that my work provided me with friends- and I was single at the time.

It's very complicated really. Its not just one thing. We moved to set up a business and we did not have the time or energy to socialize. When that went under we stayed where we were and considered our options. We were always going to move from that particular area so didn't make an effort. Now we,ve bought a house and the kids are in a new school, ive started to get involved. Our new neighbours are nice and we've had a birthday party for ds and all his friends. I do miss my family and friends and that's a big thing.

I never wanted to move so far north but dp talked me into it. I do love the countryside and all the things you can do. It's a lot more outdoorsy compared to down south and I'm an outdoors person but I miss the gentle landscape and the little villages and market towns. It's the difference in building styles, I know it's odd but its the familiarity of the surroundings. I've just never felt comfortable here like I don't belong and I don't know how to get over that. Bugger!

Is there any way you could move back? It sonds like you're really misearable which is a shame.

i moved here 8 years ago and it took a lot to feel like I belonged here. It's an odd feeling this 'belonging' and I think that's what you're feeling, that you don't belong there.

I'm happy where I am, but these feelings are sometimes still there and I really don't think they'll ever go away.I accept it, in a way it's part of who I am!

I think maybe you'll just have to come to terms with the fact that you'll always have these feelings. But if they are taking over your life and ruining your everyday existene maybe you should move. Your DH should be more flexible. You moved for him. Now he'll have to move for you.