please help my 8 year old son with cerebral palsy (I'm not asking for money!)

[kakamg]

hi my name is karla griffiths and my son has severe cerebral palsy and other complex health problems, he lives in a nursing home where i placed him in 2008, social services do not agree with this and are continually hunting for foster carers as it is a cheaper option, the people they bring in are not experienced or qualified enough let alone equipped for the job. in short my son needs the 24 hour MEDICAL care and attention he currently receives.

please read this and if you support this cause please sign the petition and pass on to your friends.
the more people, the more impact we will have against an extremely flawed system.

please follow the link to

Keep Miles Griffiths In Footprints.

many thanks for taking the time to read this i will answer any questions you may have.

Karla xx

Many parents struggle with very little respite,or no respite.LA`s vary in their willingness to pay for a residential place.Residential places are so expensive it takes from the budget that would allow more respite.I last got respite for my severely disabled 22 year old son in AUGUST and I was very lucky to get those 3 nights.I think there should be a more even allocation of resources,which if this family got support at home they may have felt able to care for their child with complex needs.Perhaps the situation evolved gradually,until it became too established to reverse.

@ checkmate

how unfair is it that we cannot afford to give up my husband's income yet foster families seem to have plenty of money given to them. Sorry just cements my opinions that these people do it for the money not for the love.

Karla, I didn't want to not reply to this. Whether foster families do it for the money or the love is a tough one to answer. Most wouldn't be able to do it without the money; just like your case, a child with complex needs (which virtually all looked-after children have) are time consuming and can't be looked after alongside a job. So foster caring becomes their job. But this is just like the staff at Footprints who look after your son now;they do their jobs for money , but its not to say they don't love the children they're caring for.

The fact that you're not getting the funding and support to look after Miles at home is a separate one, and for what its worth I'd be well up for singing a petition/making a donation for that. It's horrific. But there is a lot of non joined-up thinking in SS, and the division that finds and supports foster carers will have that money available to train and pay them for doing so.

swanker Tue 07-Dec-10 12:03:11
You may not be asking for money, but you are hijacking our forum.

No she's not. As far as I am aware, and I have been here in one guise or another for blardy ages, lots of parents make requests (and yes, sometimes for material items) and I don't see this as any different.

You have never been in this unimaginable situation - try to dredge up some empathy.

well said grumpypants!

Karla - I've signed your petition and wish you all the luck in the world. You and your family are the best placed to judge what is best for your son, and I think it is shameful that you are forced to fight so hard for it. You are not "sending your son away" but making sure his needs are met. My niece is in a residential care home, after years of her mother struggling to care for her and destroying her own health along the way. Niece and family are all much happier and healthier now. Good luck to you!

I think the general public think that parents have a choice when it comes to residential choice.We dont -its extremely hard.We have a son with complex needs and working full-time has been very difficult.I do think it has an effect on your health,certainly ours.I can recommend waving not drowning for anyone in our position ie working and caring for a severely disabled child with very little respite.

In terms of empathy, I've been there as the child (in hospital, in residential school, and in the type of provision that children who need 24 hour nursing care aged post-16 get put into).

I would say, look for other homes in the area, and try to dialogue with SS even if you are certain that foster care is a no-go (and make sure you've got reasoned argument for this).

I believe the right of SS to change provision if they are being asked to pay/contribute is fairly well-established now :S (e.g. from a home like this, to one half or a third of the price).

Listing and ranking Miles' needs as you see them in importance for him may help with this (family contact, knowledgable care/medication, school continuity etc).

I am saying this out of empathy...because the alternative may be, (although in this situation it looks less likely), for Miles to be completely sent away in terms of distance and provision as I was...talking hundreds of miles, not in the same or neighbouring county.