Not sure if this is the right topic but any ideas please?

[BelligerentGhoul]

I wonder if anybody can help/provide any perspective on this?

Work has been a really hard slog for the last 18 months or so and doesn't look like it's going to get any easier. If I could come home and switch off, it would be easier.

However, because I am a stupid perfectionist, and because I am no longer being told that I'm doing a superb job (I don't think I've got worse necessarily; just that the goalposts have changed somewhat) and only ever get told 'good' I feel that I'm questioning myself and pushing myself all the time but that however hard I try, it's never going to be 'good enough' as it were.

How can I get myself out of this pattern where 'good' seems to be a criticism and how can I help myself to switch off so that I'm not over-analysing everything all the time and driving myself bonkers because of it?

Sorry for the rant - I hope that somebody can pass over some useful ideas, rather than just telling me to take a chill-pill or ignoring me! Thanks in advance if you've reached this far and not been driven into a Ghoul-induced coma!

I have felt like this. Not sure how you can reassure yourself you are doing a good job - maybe speak to line manager about concerns?

To switch off - I find a weekend away helps - tis the wrong time of year but we often go camping in the summer, dirt cheap night away makes it feel like you have had a break.
I also have tried a guided meditation cd to help switch off which was cool - tea is ready now, I'll link later x

Thank you so much.

I think I maybe need to look into some sort of white noise CD maybe?

Its a tough one. I used to work as a coach and it can help to mentally, put down your bags at the end of the day. If it helps, either mentally or by writing it down. Make a list of the stuff you need to put down at the end of the day and the positive stuff, family, kids that you will focus on for the evening. Put on some nice music or what ever helps you relax. If you find yourself straying back to the work stuff remind yourself that you have packecd it away for now. It takes practice but it can help. Also, write yourself a positve list of the good things in your life eveyday and re read it when you get stressed

here

Is really self hypnosis. I'm awful for watching telly or being on the computer and the don't really help me unwind.

You need to take a step back. We work in the only profession where 'satisfactory' means unsatisfactory.

Strive for adequacy for a bit Good is good enough- but our profession is one where anything less than excellence is unacceptable.

It's time to coast for a few weeks. You may even find that the quality of your lessons goes up if you relax. Bollocks to 'high expectations', try a few lessons where you have no expectations and use class discussion to decide the format of the lesson. Just relax, and let the kids take responsibility for their own learning for a while.

Put yourself first, because no matter how hard you work, there will always be more to do. The work is never finished.

Oh sorry hadn't clicked that you were a teacher, snap. I also found it really helpful to not do any work at least an hour before bedtime and just allow myself to have wind down time, I find if I do that I sleep much better and have much more energy.

Thank you all so much.

Tethers - I totally agree that lessons are better when relaxed. Unfortunately, in the climate we're in (can't really say more online) relaxed is a very difficult state to reach!

'Bollocks to high expectations' will be my new mantra!

How come I can lower my expectations re the ironing pile and the dust but not re: work? :) And the more I get 'good' instead of outstanding, the more I feel I have something to prove. It's stupid I know but it's like I've got stuck in that mindset.

At our school they just don't give out outstanding grades - you should be happy with good, no? Is fab to consistantly teach at that standard.

Have PMed you, BG. Message me back if you want to say more about what's going on at school

Oh thanks so much you two. Wonderstuff: I know that you are right. Didn't really want this to turn into a conversation about teaching though: just ways to deal with having stupidly high expectations of myself and how to switch down that horrible voice in my head. This is helping a lot!

Tethers - will deffo email you: if you don't mind me ranting!

The point is, this happens far more in teaching than in most other jobs. It's not you, it's teaching.

I am now an advisory teacher for children in care (since sept). For the first time I realise what a normal job and work/life balance feels like.

Oh, I don't mind you ranting at all!

Health warning to Tethers - you may wish to avoid your inbox: it is now full of untethered rant!