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Original poster

Do other Mum's ache all the time?

30 replies

Anenome · 21/09/2010 11:09

Is it normal if you're a busy Mum of 2 under to ache all the time? I am 38 so not a spring chicken....but even an early night doesn't stop me aching...back..neck..shoulder...knees...
wrists.

I dont have any health probs that I know of..not overweight, DH is working abroad and I look after DD aged 2 all day and my elder DD is 6 and in school...at night I work from home, so long hours at the comp.

I walk long distances to keep fit...around 2 to 4 miles a day...is it just part of being a tired Mum? Or should I visit the doc? Its making me grumpy and doing every day things like carrying the younger one or shopping...is becoming a nightmare...Sad

I do take painkillers now and then but dont like to take them lots...just over the counter things.

OP posts:
Kathyjelly · 21/09/2010 16:16

I'm 47 and have a 2yo. At the mo I have achey heels from wearing cheap sandals yesterday but otherwise, no aches or pains.

When was the last time you changed your mattress? Sleeping on a knackered mattress means eight hours with all your joints unsupported which could do it.

Original poster
Anenome · 21/09/2010 16:30

Kathyjelly good point...it's 5 years old...is that old?

OP posts:
pud1 · 21/09/2010 16:34

my back aches alot. i have a 2.5 yo and a 1 yo. i am not over weight ( although i am at my biggest) and my matress is newish. i just put it down to being constanlty on the floor or with a child on my arms.

redrobin · 21/09/2010 16:40

i ache all the time too. my back kills me! i've started pilates to see if that helps, but i think its general running about and lifting heavy children. or maybe age....('m 42 with 3 under 5)

moragbellingham · 21/09/2010 16:58

I used to ache after I'd had DD1 so much that I couldn't get out of bed to feed her.
My HV said it was all normalHmm and took a year to recover from having a baby. It got to the stage where I couldn't move without being in pain.
After a few months it turned out to be something medical and easily remedied that my HV should've spotted and been advising me on!!

I would go and see your GP for check up just in case. Blood tests/deficiencies etc.

Original poster
Anenome · 21/09/2010 17:38

Well...seems some aches are normal then...maybe Im starting with the blinking arthiritis already...I mean my youngest is over 2 now...so I''m not still recovering...wrists an knees is a biggie with me.

OP posts:
Mervynne · 21/09/2010 18:14

I went to the dr when ds was a baby because I hurt so blimmin' much. Turns out it was hormonal but he did a good range of tests. FWIW I am your age now and I have started aching again Sad I think it's..... elderliness (in my case).

Original poster
Anenome · 21/09/2010 19:11

I agree to some extent Mervynne...but really...is 38 that old?

Not really...I mean..if I were overweight and never moved then I could understand it...but Im pretty fit...I gues its the docs for me!

OP posts:
Mervynne · 21/09/2010 19:13

I never thought it was, but it feels it!

moragbellingham · 21/09/2010 22:13

Did you BF?

moragbellingham · 21/09/2010 22:14

Oops, misread your post - thought you had 2 under 2. Ignore the BF question then.

NonnoMum · 21/09/2010 22:19

I ache from the ludicrous tightness of my control knickers.

Alwaysworthchecking · 21/09/2010 22:48

Nonnomum, I just snorted with laughter at that!

Anenome, I don't think it is normal, in that I don't think you should just put up with it. I'm 39 and have a lot of aches and pains, but then I also have lupus. That's the kind of thing that makes it 'normal', but it isn't normally normal...iyswim.

Are your aches symmetrical, are they worst first thing in the morning, do you have any swelling around your joints and are you generally more knackered than you'd expect for being a parent at 38? If the answer to any of those is yes, then I'd trot or hobble off to the docs and ask to see a rheumatologist.

Sending you sympathy and hoping it all clears up soon.

Alwaysworthchecking · 21/09/2010 23:00

Sorry. I just thought about my reply and realised it may have sounded like I am attempting to diagnose you with lupus. I'm not and I'm sorry if it sounded that way. I just meant that those were some of my symptoms and if you have them too, it's worth getting them checked out. They are also some of the symptoms for Rheumatoid Arthritis. (I was tested for that too.)

I just know how hard it is to be in constant pain and yet have to get on with all the things you have to do as part of a normal life.

I also should have added that I no longer ache all the time - just some of the time.

I also should have read through my post before I posted it. Sorry.

spinspinsugar · 22/09/2010 00:20

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spinspinsugar · 22/09/2010 00:22

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spinspinsugar · 22/09/2010 00:24

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Kathyjelly · 23/09/2010 08:16

Anenome, back to the mattress thingy, could you stay with your mum for a couple of days. People usually have relatively unused mattresses in their spare rooms and if you get up on day two with no achey bits, then that would give you a good idea.

But 38 isn't old enough to have general achiness surely. Or we'd all have retire at 50. And you do plenty of exercise. So if not the mattress, agree with the others and go to the doc's. You can't ache for another forty years and not say something! Smile

dandruffandarguments · 23/09/2010 08:29

sorry if this sounds like I'm challenging your notion of fitness, because that is very much for you to judge - but walking 2-4 miles a day might not really be enough for the fitness that you need to deal with a fairly hectic life with lots of lifting. Different activities need different levels of fitness, but i've always found the fitter you are the easier things feel generally, and the more stamina you have.

You might find that if you managed to jog the 2-4 miles a day, then a lot of the aches and pains go away, if they are muscular pains. It can be great for relaxing your back muscles.

I realise that may not be feasible with a 2 + 6 yo - are there any modifications you could make that would let you get a bit more vigourous exercise?

marenmj · 23/09/2010 08:32

ooo, I ache all the time and I'm 10 years younger than you!

Not overweight, not especially fit either, just terribly bone-tired Sad

Bonsoir · 23/09/2010 08:45

It's the carrying that makes you ache. If you walk long distances (good) and carry/push/drag (bad), you will ache like hell!

Stop wearing any form of shoulder bag (even an across the body bag) and wear a bum bag instead - this makes a huge difference very quickly. And use the internet for all heavy shopping.

And, yes, make sure you are sitting properly at the computer.

marenmj · 23/09/2010 08:50

Bonsoir, had to laugh when I read this as I am leaning back in my computer chair with ny feet up on the wall! In my defense, it elevates my feet and gives my lower back a good stretch, since it's always so sore from carrying/dragging 21 m o DD everywhere we need to go Grin

nigglewiggle · 23/09/2010 12:19

Alwaysworthchecking I was diagnosed with Discoid Lupus (only affects the skin) about 10 years ago. It has been dormant for years, but has recently flared again. I am also suffering from constant muscle aches. I am now wondering whether this could all be Lupus related. But it is not symmetrical and I don't have swollen joints. At the moment I have a stiff neck a sore shoulder and an achey hip. It is more like pulled muscles than arthritic-type pain.

I had to see the GP for steroid cream for the rash, but she never asked me about any other symptoms, mind-you she had to look in a book to find out what a lupus rash looked like.

Sorry for the hijack Anenome.

Canadiangirl · 23/09/2010 17:41

I'm also a bit achey at the mo and was going to start a post just like this! I'm also 38, with a 17 week old boy. I'm getting random pins and needles in my feet, legs, arms and hands, not any particular time of day etc. I also have some aches and pains in my limbs, kind of like they're super tired, like I've just run for awhile, or lifted weights. Also have achey knees, but my dr said it seems like there's something up with my cartilage and if it continues he'll send me to a physio. He did say my pins and needles aren't limited to one place so it probably isn't MS! The fact that he even mentioned MS has now massively panicked me. Anyone else having similar pins and needles or aches that can put my mind at rest?! I assumed it was down to carrying around a 15lb boy all day...!

zen1 · 23/09/2010 21:33

Another 38yr old achy person here Smile. With me, it's mostly my hips and back. I have 3DCs aged 7, 4 and 22months (still carrying 22 month old everywhere as can't walk yet). Also, my ankles are really stiff if I get up after sitting / lying down for a while, but within a minute of moving around the pain / stiffness weras off. It also seems to be worse after walking then resting ( I also walk 2 - 4 miles a day).

moragbellingham, I don't know if you're still around but I was interested in why you asked the OP if they BF? I am still BF and wondered if it might be linked to the aching in some way? I had the stiff and achy ankle thing for a long time after DC1 was born, but it subsided and only came back each time I had a new baby (even though DC3 is nearly 2 now!)