Phobia getting out of control.

[Mirage]

This makes me feel so stupid,but things are getting out of control & I don't know what to do.

I seem to have developed a phobia about barking dogs.I know what caused it-in our last house,a neighbour left her 2 dogs to bark all day whilst she was out & they barked & yapped from 7am until about 10pm at night.It drove me to tears.I couldn't use the garden without them starting up.

We moved away to a place I've always wanted to live & I visited loads of times to check that we weren't going to end up with the same problem & our 1st few weeks here were fine.Then we found out that someone down the street ran a dog agility club 2 nights a week,in the field behind their house,which was bedlam with excitable dogs barking.Now someone else has bought what sounds like a puppy & leaves it on its own during the day & of course the poor thing whines & cries until its owners come home.

It is unrealistic for me to expect that everyone around keeps there dogs quiet or doesn't leave them-& moving again is out of the question.I really need to come to terms with this & get over it.I just don't know where to start,just the sound of a dog barking makes me jump & go all panicky.I'm starting to get irritable & snap at the children because I'm on edge all the while.I feel like crying because it is so irrational & nobody else seems bothered by it.

Please,can anyone help?

hi mirage i don,t think you should have to listen to dogs barking,just because owners decide to leave them on their own,could you have a word with them,i know sometimes some people are not approachable .i have a westie she loves to bark at the postman when i know he s on his way i bring her in,i don,t let her bark,i don,t like it myself,sorry i cannot help but hope you can sort something out soon.

Thankyou Beetroot.What is nlp? I live about 100 miles from London,so unless he can do phone sessions I might be struggling,but I'd appreciate his number anyway,just to see what he says.

Thanks edgetop,my mum & dad don't let their dog bark either,I think considerate people like yourself are in the minority though.I don't know the people with the puppy,their house is behind a big wooden gate & I've yet to see them.I might see if I can have a word with them,but as we live in quite a remote village,the mentality around here seems to be that barking dogs are a good thing because of intruders!My nextdoor neighbours have a collie which barks if someone comes up the drive,but that doesn't bother me-its the continual hysterical barking which upsets me.

I really need to deal with why I am affected so much by it,because,unless we move to the middle of nowhere,I'm going to have to face it wherever we are.Even dogs on the TV make me flinch now.I'd try anything to get rid of this phobia-even hypnotism if I thought it would work.

I had a course of NLP and few sessions of hypnotherapy for a phobia, and found the hypnotherapy worked. It wasn't a case of "you are feeling sleeeepppyyy", more like teaching methods of relaxation and self hypnosis which you can use whenever you need to. Not cheap, (altho it will depend how many sessions you need), but it worked for me.

Hi mirage - our local gp surgery runs counselling sessions but you have to be referred. I will be going to the dr soon to see about my needle phobia.

Oh Colditz - that is what my NLP and hypnotherapy was for.I decided I had to tackle it before I ttc.

Def recommend hypnosis or NLP. You should be able to get someone near to you to do it - though check out their credentials or get a local recommendation.

Poor you though - it sounds like a nightmare, though you are well ahead of the game in recognising that it is a phobia/unreasonable response. You will def be able to get it sorted with the right help - then you'll be able to enjoy your new house .

I totallly appreciate the fact that you feel you have a phobia and I can totally understand why. Hoever I used to live in an area where we had constant loud musid at night and I used to get SO worked up and stressed about it that I reacted like you. It wasn't a phobia but it def affected me. Barking dogs get to me too.

I know you haven't met the neighbours who have the puppy but how about putting a note in their door to say that they may not realise but that the pup is very unhappy being left all day. They may just think that the pup settles when they leave. Maybe they would think twice. I am not a particular dog lover but remember being totally on edge one night due to a dog howling and crying - I can imagine that if that went on I would do something drastic.

Thanks everyone-I feel so much better for just admitting it to someone.

bettythebuilder,I'm glad hypnotherapy worked for you,I am quite willing to try it.I am rubbish at relaxation,2 seperate people have done relaxation tapes for me & neither of them worked.I thinh hypnotherapy might do the trick though.

Colditz-thanks,I dread going to the Dr to admit I have a problem,but if you do it,so will I..I hope you get your counselling sorted out quickly.

Zippy539-thanks,just hearing that these things helped other people makes me feel better.I love my house & the area & this silly fear is spoiling it.

Monstermum,I know what you mean about loud music.That is the other thing that sends my stress levels sky high.Your idea about a note is a good one.I have since heard that the people at the house used to breed dogs,but don't any longer,so perhaps they aren't used to having one dog on its own & don't realise its lonely?

Feeling more positive tonight

I have done it!

I spoke to a NLP practitioner today & she is coming to see me on Thursday.I'm still stressed over 1 thing & another,but feel so much better having taken a step towards beating this thing.

Thanks for encouraging me to get help

Good for you, Mirage.
Hope all goes well on Thursday.Would it be possible for your dh/dp to give the children their dinner, put them to bed etc on thursday so that you can have some time to yourself on thurs evening?
After a "session" I think it really helps to have a break from routine to get maximum benefit.

Well done Mirage.

I have spoken to my midwife and she has agreed to let me have gas and air for my blood tests...