Just found out my Mums Dad is not her real Dad but how can we found out who is?

[lavenderbongo]

My grandmother recently died and my great Aunt then let slip to my Mum that my Grandad is not actually her biological Dad.

Now this makes no difference to how Mum feels about her Dad but it would be interesting to know who her real father is. My Grandad is still alive but my mother doesnt want to upset him by letting him know that she is aware he is not her biological father. We dont think that my great Aunt knows who the real father is.

My parents have tried looking online for my Mums birth certificate but they are unable to find it for some reason. Her copy of the birth certificate looks like it has been altered (they noticed this years ago and Mum was teased about it but thought nothing of it) the year of birth has been changed from a 1 to a 2. Mum was born in the south Wales Valleys.

Does anyone have any idea how we could trace her biological father and even if it is possible. We would like to find a copy of her original birth certificate but guesse she might have initially been registered under her biological fathers name but we obviously dont know what this is. Has anyone got any suggestions. Thanks.

Have they looked in the indexes for births under your grandmother's maiden name in the year starting with a 1 (and the year starting with a 2)? Is the certificate she has a long form or short form certificate?

When did your grandmother marry her husband, in relation to your mother's birth?

It's actually very unlikely that the biological father will be named on the birth certificate, so I suspect that with the death of your grandmother her chances of finding the name have been lost (your grandfather might know, but she doesn't want to ask him).

P&L is correct - unless your grandmother was married to the father of your mother then it is only if the father was present at the registration that his name will be on the birth certificate. You are not allowed to just enter a mans name on the certificate unless you have his permission or he is present.

Look at your mothers full name - does it give any clues? i.e. is her middle name Hilary for exaple an unsexual name? Is her middle name similar to a mans name or surname?

Your grandmother has died - are there any letters or diaries tucked away that may give clues around the time of your mothers birth what was happening and who was around her at the birth or more likely 9 months previous.

Is it in fact that your grandfather is the biological father and that your grandparents had to get married as your grandmother was pg at the time - thus the change of date on the birth certificate? Has your aunt got hold of the wrong end of the stick - this does happen a lot.

To find your mothers birth certificate you can search the GRO (gereral register office) index which is the index of births marriages and deaths from 1837 - 2007. You can search this on line at several websites. Search the year you think your mother was born and then at least two years each side of that. Then go to the gro website and order the birth certificate for the price of £7 if you do it online or £8.50 if you telephone. You need to make a note of the vol and page number as the gro will need these references to find the original certificate. Google GRO to get there webpage and then follow the links for obtaining a copy certificate.

hope this helps

Thanks PortandLemon and IvyKaty44. My Great Aunt told my Mum after Nan had died and I believe her as it makes sense as Mum didnt live with Nan and Grandad for 14 years which was always a bit odd.

We have searched online for the birth certificate and cant find it. Will try the GRO website.

I think we might never know - I dont think Mum is that bothered but myself and my sis are quite curious.

If you are not fining the reference online (the online gro is not always complete - some have left out variuos quarters by mistake and some are transcriptions so therefore not complete) Go to your local library and ask where you can look at a copy on fiche (a fiche is a negative thingy) a lot of large libraries hold them and so do county records offices sometimes.

Birmingham, cardiff etc will have copies and you can search through.

go gently with your mum as it may be bothering her more than she is letting on (sometimes people do hide these feels away) I am sure you and your sister will be sensitive though.

good luck